“Something like that. You do it, too. I saw you the night after Earl Walker tortured you.”
I cringed at the thought of that night. It was not my favorite.
“You went into a deep sleep and healed your wounds almost overnight.”
I scoffed. “It didn’t feel very instant.”
“Dutch, how many people can go through that, then get up and around the very next day?”
“Oh, well, maybe you’re right. But it still hurt like the John Dickens.”
“John?”
“I went to school with him. He used to twist my arm and give me carpet burns.”
He laid his arm over his forehead again. “I could sever his spine.”
“It’s all right,” I said with a soft laugh. “Last I heard, he was selling insurance out of his Buick. He’s paying for his impertinence tenfold. But, so, are you still mad at me?”
“Yes.”
“Okay.” After a long moment, I asked, “Do you know how long you’ll be mad at me?”
“No.”
“Okay.”
“Why did you block me from accessing your emotions? Why did you leave without me after everything we discussed?”
“I don’t know. I was just going to Rocket’s and – I just – I don’t want you to think I’m this fragile thing you have to protect 24/7. I want to be able to take care of myself. I want you to know that I can take care of myself.”
“You can. I know that you can better than anyone. And you’ll get better at it as you come into your powers, but until then, what is so wrong with my company?”
“What?” I asked him. “What are you talking about?”
“It’s like you can’t get away from me fast enough.”
“That’s not it, Reyes. That has nothing to do with it.”
“Right.”
“I was mad, okay? You were talking to that woman and you blocked me first.”
After a long moment, he said, “I can’t feel you. I have no idea if you’re lying.”
But I could feel him. I could feel the hurt I’d caused, and a wave guilt washed over me. I’d never meant any of this in the vein he was taking it.
I brushed a lock of his hair over his brow and said simply, “Aperite.” And with that word, I laid bare my emotions again.
He inhaled sharply with the reemergence of my feelings.
“I didn’t want you to feel my jealousy,” I said, embarrassed. “That newswoman seemed very into you.”
“Dutch,” he said, wrapping a hand around my neck, “all the women who come into the bar are into me.”
I almost laughed. Self-deprecating, he wasn’t.
“Or they think they are.” His voice hardened with resentment. “They don’t even know me, Dutch. Their need is exhausting.”
I truly could understand that. Well, not from personal experience or anything. I tended to repel instead of attract. But I felt it from the women and men who came into the bar. He was like a flame, drawing moths from all walks of life, only to have their wings suffocate the fire within him.
“I know where they’re coming from. I’m the same way. I’ve lusted after you since the first time I met you. And I still am, Reyes. I’m your biggest fan.”
He ran his thumb along my jaw and over my mouth. “No. It’s different with you. You were never a sure thing.”
I snorted. “Clearly you have misinterpreted my interest.”
“No, I haven’t. You were never like them. I wish you could feel what I feel. You’re amazingly different. You may not believe this, but you could take me or leave me any day of the week. You could drop me in your wake and be fine.”
I shook my head. “No, Rey’aziel, I couldn’t.”
“I love that you believe that.”
“There’s no winning with a man who just defended me against a hound from hell.”
He dropped his hand, and I felt a wave of shame radiate out of him. “A man who tried to defend you. A man who failed.”
“What?” I shrieked a little too loudly. I slammed my lids shut and waited to make sure I hadn’t woken the two in the living room. When they didn’t so much as stir in their sleep, I whispered, “What the —? You fought a hellhound for me. Three of them, to be exact. What more could I ask from my affianced? I’m so sorry I went in there.”
“If you hadn’t, we might not be here.” He nodded toward Osh. “They incapacitated us before I could do anything. It was so fast.” He smiled at me, his dark eyes shimmering in the glow from my bathroom night-light. That thing was really bright. “But you were faster.”
“I was slow. A bumbling mess. I stopped time just long enough to send myself into a complete panic.”
“You’re wrong,” he said. “I saw you. You moved with the speed and stealth of a cheetah. They didn’t stand a chance.”
“Only because of Zeus. He worked.”
“The god?” he asked, teasing me.
“The knife.”
“Zeus, huh?”
“Well, I thought about calling him Reyes, but I didn’t want to confuse anyone. Including me.”
“And what about that one?” he asked, glancing toward the bun. “She got a name?”
“Beep. For now.”
“Beep?” he asked, his expression humorous.