My chair skidded across the floor as I jumped up. Eric Fitch. I knew where he lived. He thought he was going to hurt my Jenny and my Lilly and get away with it. Well, he had another thing coming.
“Are you drunk? Devin, what the hell’s wrong? What’s going on?” The worry in her eyes fueled my rage.
I turned away and headed for the back door. The screened door was ripped off of its hinges as I tore through it. Then I was at my car. I was drunk, I could feel myself dragging, but it didn’t matter.
I couldn’t find a baseball bat, so instead I picked up the tire iron I had used before and hopped into my car, broken glass and all.
“Devin!” I heard Jenny scream after me as I squealed tires down the road.
The ride to his house was a blur. I had drunk too much and I could still feel. I was so angry I was seeing red.
I ran into the back of a car when I finally made it to Eric’s driveway. I beat the hell out of the door for what felt like hours and then finally he answered. It pissed me off more when I saw the look in his eyes. He remembered me and he knew why I was there. He knew it was my baby sister.
I didn’t even say two words to him.
“Look, man, I’m sorry.” He held up his hands like a little bitch.
I yanked him down the front porch steps to the middle of his yard and then I began to unmercifully beat the living shit out of him. I’d left my tire iron in the car, but I think using my fists felt better. It hurt so good to beat him in the face. My knuckles cracked with each hit.
He called for help and at one point I was almost positive someone else was screaming for me to stop, but I couldn’t and I didn’t want to. I wanted him to hurt the way Lilly and Jenny had hurt. I wanted to break him the way that I was broken.
Once he stayed down and I didn’t see him moving anymore, I dropped to the ground next to his limp body. There was blood everywhere, but I didn’t care. That bastard needed to bleed.
When I stood I could feel myself leaning. I hoped that I could make it to the car, but the liquor was in my veins and no matter how badly I wanted it to numb me, I still could feel.
I felt like I was coming apart, like there were pieces of me trying to run away from each other in opposite directions, and it was ten times worse than before.
How was I ever going to feel centered again? How was I ever going to feel anything other than pain and anger again? I needed to feel centered. I needed to be alive and I needed to be balanced again.
I turned back to my car and hopped in. I needed Lilly.
Twenty-Six
Comfort
I hadn’t heard from Devin pretty much all day. My first day back at work sucked and I’d spent the day excited to see him. He was supposed to come over, but he never did. I called him and texted, but I heard nothing.
At one point, Jenny called and asked if I had heard from him. I could tell by her voice that something was wrong, but when I asked she said nothing. That of course made me worry more.
As much as I hated it, the idea of him and another woman popped into my head. He was gorgeous and I knew women found him attractive. It would hurt to find out he was seeing someone else.
I sat up in bed watching TV with my phone in hand. I kept almost dozing off and jumping, and then finally, at some point, I fell asleep.
A loud pounding on the door woke me. I waited for a bit hoping that Shannon would get it, but then I remembered she wasn’t home. I peeled the comforter back and climbed out of bed. Then I remembered I was worried about Devin and ran to the door.
Once I got to the door, I checked the peep hole and saw his face. Relief filled me and I suddenly felt a rush of happiness. I opened the door with a smile on my face that soon melted when I saw his messy appearance.
The doorframe held him up as he leaned all of his weight against it. Expressionless, bloodshot eyes stared back at me as he lifted his hand and ran it roughly down his unshaved face. His hair was disheveled and there was blood on the front of his shirt. Panic rose up as I took him in. I rushed to him and ran my fingers down his body, as I checked for injuries.
“You’re bleeding! Oh my God, Devin! What happened? Are you OK?” I went on and on as I checked him over.
“It’s not my blood,” he slurred.
I took a better look at his gorgeous face. His unfocused eyes attempted to meet mine and it was then that the smell of liquor reached my nose.
“You’re drunk?”
“Abso-fucking-lutely.” He attempted to move toward me and almost fell over.
I wrapped my arms around him and helped him into my apartment. Once we made it to the couch I let him collapse onto the cushion before I went straight to work on his clothes. I removed his blood-stained shirt first and threw it to the side. Quickly, I checked him over again just to be sure that he wasn’t injured somewhere. His skin felt cold and clammy against my fingertips.