I was still standing guard when Wanda came back from shopping. She didn't see me as she walked past with two really big bags full of stuff. "Whoooooo, " I said in my best spooky voice. "Whoooooo . . . " "Argh!" she squeaked. "Don't do that, Araminta!" "Whoooooo . . . What have you got in those baaaaaaags?" I said, flapping my arms like Edmund sometimes does.
"Nothing, " said Wanda, which was obvi ously a lie. A big lie. Then she tried to change the subject. "Anyway, what are you doing there?" "I am on guard, " I told her. "Why?" I was about to tell her that I was stopping our best ghost from leaving forever when a huge crash came from the basement. Wanda rushed off and I followed. I figured Sir Horace would be safe because at least now I knew where Ned and Jed were. They were in the first-kitchen-on the-right-just-before-the-laundry-room. The first-kitchen-on-the-right-just-before-the laundry-room is where Aunt Tabby keeps stacks of plates--but not anymore.
Just as we got there the door flew open with a bang and a stream of plates came flying out and hit the wall opposite. Smash, smash, smash, smash, smash, smash, smash, smash! Wanda screamed and dropped the shop ping bags and I am sure that I heard the crunch of cheese and onion chips getting squashed. I can hear the sound of squashed cheese and onion chips from miles away. We took cover until the plates had stopped, then we peered around the door. Yes, you guessed it--Ned and Jed were sitting at the kitchen table, grinning, in the middle of a sea of broken plates. I added the plates to the Things that Aunt Tabby Will Not Like When She Comes Home list. "Hello, little girls, " they said. of -118
A couple plates zoomed out and hovered above our heads like flying saucers. "Don't you dare!" I told them. Very slowly, the plates flew back into the kitchen and settled down onto the last teeter ing stack. "Why don't you go and haunt somewhere else?" said Wanda, furious. "Why should we? We like it here, " said Jed--or was it Ned? "In fact we like it here so much that we have decided to stay, " said Ned--or was it Jed? "Well, in that case, you can stay in here, " I said and I slammed the door with a bang. Inside the room there was a massive crash. "Oops, " said Wanda. "That's the rest of the plates. " "Well, at least those two ghosts didn't have the fun of smashing them, " I said, then I locked the door and left the key in the lock.
"They can stay in there now, " I told Wanda. "Good riddance. " "But they are ghosts, Araminta, " said Wanda. "Ghosts can go through doors. " "They wouldn't dare, " I said.