A loaf of fresh bread is waved underneath my nose. I come out of sleep smiling, the scent of warm goodness filling my nostrils. For a few groggy moments I think I'm at home with Dervish, it's a Sunday morning, no school, no worries, a long, lazy day stretching deliriously ahead of me.
Then my eyes focus. I see the lined fingers clutching the bread and the bearded face beyond. I remember. And all the good thoughts disappear in an instant.
"How long was I asleep?" I yawn, sitting up, wincing from the pain in my back-I'm not used to sleeping on a stone floor.
"Many hours," Beranabus says, handing me the bread.
"Eight? Ten? Twelve?"
He shrugs.
I look for my watch, but the strap must have snapped during the night of my turning. Standing, I rub the sides of my back, stretch and groan. "Haven't you heard of beds?" I complain.
"You'll grow accustomed to the floor after a few months."
I squint at him. Months? I've no intention of being here that long. But before I can challenge him, he walks over to the fire where the sour-faced boy is still perched close to the flames. I follow, tearing a chunk out of the loaf, gobbling it. The bread's chewy and I haven't any butter, but I'm so hungry I could happily eat cardboard.
Beranabus sits close to the boy. I stay on my feet, studying the curious couple. Ancient Beranabus and the teenager, not much older than me. The shabby, bearded, hairy, suited magician and the boy-his apprentice or servant?-in drab but clean clothes, completely bald. The boy's dark flesh is laced with small scars and fading bruises. The tips of the two smallest fingers on his left hand are missing. His eyes have a faraway, miserable look. He wears no shoes. Beranabus is barefoot too, his boots discarded.
"Grubitsch Grady meet Kernel Fleck," Beranabus introduces us.
"Grubbs," I correct him, sticking out a hand. The boy only grunts. "What about your name?" I ask, trying to be friendly despite his cold welcome. "Is it Colonel, like in the army?"
"No. Kernel, like in popcorn," Beranabus answers after a few seconds of stony silence. "It's short for something longer, but neither of us can remember what."
Kernel sniffs and faces the fire. There are sausages speared to a stick close by. He picks up the stick and jams the sausages into the flames. Mutters a spell. The heat of the fire increases and the sausages cook in seconds. He takes one off, blows on it and eats it, then takes off another and gives it to Beranabus. After a pause, he removes a third sausage and offers it to me.
"Thanks," I say, biting into it. Too hot, but delicious. I ravenously munch my way through it, then gratefully accept another.
"Kernel does most of the cooking," Beranabus says, holding a sausage in one hand, picking at dirt beneath the nails of his right foot with the other.
"I have to," Kernel says. "He'd eat the food raw if I didn't."
"It's all the same once your stomach processes it," Beranabus snorts. "Hot, cold, cooked, raw... it doesn't make any difference when you're squatting over a hole."
"A hole?" I frown.
"No toilets," Kernel says, looking at Beranabus sourly.
Kernel cooks some chicken legs, again using his spell. (I wonder where they get the food from, but don't ask.) He piles them on a dusty, cracked plate, then cooks some ribs and potatoes. That done, he takes what he wants from the plate and passes it across.
Beranabus bites into his chicken leg, then looks over at me. "Tell me everything about the last few months. I know a lot already, but I want the complete story. When you realised your body was changing, how the magic developed, the way you dealt with it."
"I thought you were the one meant to provide answers."
"I will," he promises. "But you first. It will make my job easier."
While we eat, I fill him in on all that happened, discovering my magical ability after Slawter, fighting it, the sickness, using magic to counter the threat of the werewolf.
"Why did you fight the magic in the first place?" he interrupts. "Most people would be thrilled if they found themselves in your position."
"I know what magic entails," I say quietly. "It's linked to the Demonata. I've been part of that crazy universe before. I didn't want to get sucked into it again."
Beranabus and Kernel share a look. Then Beranabus tells me to continue.
I explain about the cave we unearthed in Carcery Vale, going there under the influence of the beast, digging through the rubble blocking the entrance, Loch's accident, Dervish covering up, Juni entering our lives.
"Who's Juni Swan?" Kernel asks Beranabus.
"One of Lord Loss's assistants," Beranabus says, squinting. "Actually she..." He stops and clears his throat. "We can discuss Miss Swan and her background later. Finish, please, Grubitsch."
"It's Grubbs," I correct him again, then cover the last couple of days and nights, the werewolf taking over, killing Bill-E's grandparents, Juni whipping me out of town and betraying me on the plane. I tell the story as quickly as I can, eager to get it out of the way. I don't go into all the details, like the voice and the face in the rock, figuring they're not important. I can tell Beranabus about them later.
Beranabus listens silently, then spends a couple of minutes thinking about what I've said. "The boy who fell," he finally says, echoing Dervish's concerns when he first came to the cave. "Was it definitely an accident? Nobody else was-"
"No," I cut in. "We were alone, just the three of us. He slipped, fell, died. An accident. No demons or evil mages were involved."
"Good," Beranabus grunts. "When I heard the entrance had been excavated and someone had died in the cave, I feared the worst-especially since my spells of warning hadn't worked. I should have been alerted the moment the first rock was lifted out. I assumed a powerful mage had spun a counterspell and was preparing the way for a demon invasion. I've never moved so quickly in my life."
"He ran like his feet were on fire," Kernel says, smiling for the first time-but it's a brief, thin smile.
"Dervish told me about the cave," I say softly. "How it was used as a crossing point for demons. He said the tunnel between universes could be reopened, that the Demonata could come through in their thousands and take over our world. You don't think Juni and Lord Loss..."
"No." Beranabus smiles wryly, showing his crooked, discoloured teeth. "Lord Loss has no interest in opening tunnels between universes. Most demons want to destroy humanity, but Lord Loss thrives on human misery. He's as keen to keep that tunnel closed as we are."
Beranabus picks at his teeth with a thin chicken bone. His breath stinks. In fact most of him stinks. He obviously isn't concerned about personal hygiene. Finally, laying the bone aside, he speaks again. "The cave brought me to Carcery Vale, but you're why I stayed. I could feel the power in you, bursting to be released. I wanted to be there when it exploded-or when you imploded."
"Imploded?"
"You could have burnt up. If the magic hadn't found an outlet, it would have destroyed you from within. There was no way of telling until the full moon, when I knew you'd be pushed to the point where you and the beast had to settle the matter once and for all.
"The werewolf is the key," he continues. "The curse of the Gradys. Many centuries ago, your ancestors bred with demons."
"Bred?" I yelp. "No way!"
"It doesn't happen often," Beranabus says. "Most demons are physically incompatible with humans. But it's not unheard of. When such unions occur, the offspring are never natural. Humans and demons weren't meant to mix. When they do, their children are freaks of the highest order, neither human nor demon, caught painfully between. Most die at birth. But some survive."
His face is dark, shadows flickering across it from the flames of the fire. "A few grow and thrive, either in the demon's universe or ours. Your ancestor's child was one of those. The magical strand of the Demonata stayed hidden, at least long enough for the child to mature and bear children of its own. When its demonic legacy finally surfaced, the victim turned into a wolflike creature."
"So the Demonata are to blame," I growl, hating them afresh. "I gathered as much from Dervish, but I was never sure."
"I don't know about blame," Beranabus says. "Such couplings are often set in motion by humans. Your ancestor quite possibly made the first approach, and..." He twirls his fingers suggestively.
"Here comes the bride," mutters Kernel.
Beranabus looks into the flames, considering his next words. "You're a unique specimen, even for a Grady. I've never seen or heard of anyone like you. Magic is unpredictable, chaotic. It works differently in each person. But there are general rules which have always applied-until now. You shattered all of them."
"Is that a good or a bad thing?" I ask.
"I don't know. It's the reason I didn't approach you immediately. I wasn't sure how you'd change, what the magic would do when it surfaced. Of course there was Juni to consider too. I didn't know how close you and Dervish were to her, if you knew who she served."
"Of course we didn't!" I bellow. "Lord Loss killed my parents and sister. Do you think-"
"Peace," Beranabus says. "I trust you now, but I couldn't before. For all I knew, you and Dervish were in league with Juni Swan and I was being lured into a trap. Dervish himself might have opened the entrance to the cave to entice me to Carcery Vale."
"Have you been paranoid for long?" I ask cynically.
"I learnt a long time ago not to trust anybody," he replies tightly. "Not until they've proved themselves worthy. And even then I keep a close watch on them."
"I've been with Beranabus for thirty years or more," Kernel says, "and I still wake up sometimes to find him giving me the evil eye."
"Thirty years?" I study the boy again. "You can't be that old."
"We'll come to that soon," Beranabus says before Kernel can respond. "Let's finish with your magic first. Where was I?"
"You were waxing lyrical about how unique he was," Kernel reminds him.
"Aye." Beranabus's face lights up. "In every other magician, the gift of magic is evident from birth. Even if they're unaware of their potential, other magicians can sense it. Dervish should have seen the magic within you, but he didn't. Because you hid it from him. From yourself too."
"No. I knew it was there."
"You knew after Slawter," Beranabus corrects me, "but it didn't start then. This power has been with you since you were born. Some secret part of you knew what you were from the day you came into this world-but it was afraid. It didn't want the power and responsibility. So it pushed the magic down deep where it couldn't work or even be noticed.
"No other magician can do that. They can deny their calling and refuse to hone their talent, but they can't bury it completely. But you were so powerful that even as a child you were instinctively able to hide your magic from the world. If not for the Grady curse, it would have lain hidden for the rest of your life, a great power wasted."
"I wish it had," I mutter angrily.
"You shouldn't," scolds Beranabus. "If not for the magic, you'd be a wild, raging animal now. The barriers you erected between yourself and your magical potential began to crumble when you first faced demons. You had to draw on your inner power when you fought Lord Loss and his familiars. You drove your magic back down afterwards, but cracks had appeared in your armour.
"The magic has been buzzing around inside you ever since, trying to break free. You kept a lid on it for a long time, but then the curse kicked in. The werewolf came to the fore. That should have been the end of Grubitsch Grady. But the magician within you opposed the beast. You said you used magic to fight the change, but you're wrong-magic used you. It stopped you becoming a monster."
"No it didn't," I say guiltily. "I turned for a while. I killed Ma and Pa Spleen. Next time, when the moon's full and the werewolf takes over, I'll kill again."
"Do you really believe that?" Beranabus asks.
"Of course." I stare at him, confused.
He shakes his head. "The moon has exerted as powerful an influence over you as it ever will. The beast dominated for a short time, but you drove it back. It will rise again, but you'll beat it then too. It will be easier next time. The beast will always be within you, snarling and spitting, battling to break free when the moon sings to it. But you're in control. You won."
"I didn't win!" I snap. "I killed Bill-E's grandparents. That's not winning. Even if I never again lose control, I've already killed. How can you say everything's OK? Maybe you don't count the murder of your half-brother's grandparents as a big deal, but I do. So don't-"
"Show him how to remember," Kernel interrupts. "I'm not going to listen to him rant and rage for hours. Teach him the spell-let him see how it really played out. That will shut him up."
"What are you talking about?" I growl.
"A spell to help you recall everything that happened while you were transformed," Beranabus says.
"Why would I want to do that?"
"To learn the truth."
"But I already-"
"Just let him teach you the damn spell," Kernel snaps.
I feel uneasy-I don't want to relive the murders-but they've aroused my curiosity, so I play along. Beranabus tells me to close my eyes and focus on my breathing. I breathe in... hold it for five seconds... then breathe out. When I have the right rhythm, he tells me the words to use. Breaks them down into simple syllables so I can repeat them, even though I don't know what they mean.
As I draw towards the end of the spell, a screen forms within my thoughts. It's the huge TV screen from home. Blank, grey, like it's on standby. I'm about to tell Beranabus there's no signal, but then the screen flickers. Bursts of light. Static. Then...
The cave. Just after I froze the waterfall into ice. I see everything through the eyes of the beast. I'm crouched low, howling, squinting into the light of Juni's torch as she pads hesitantly towards me. It's crazy, but as I'm watching, in spite of all I know about her now, I feel concern for Juni. I want her to flee before the wolf attacks. I almost call a warning to her, but then I remember this is a screened replay, it's not happening live.
In the cave, Juni comes within touching distance and regards me coolly. "The great Grubbs Grady changes at last," she sneers, then spits at me. "You pathetic creature! If you knew how much I've loathed these past weeks, having to be nice to you and your mongrel of an uncle."
The beast roars at her and raises its fists to beat her to a pulp. This time I root for the werewolf, wanting it to kill the deceitful witch. But before it can strike, Juni utters a quick spell and it falls to the ground and rolls around with muffled grunts and yelps, before coming to a quivering halt.
"There," Juni smiles, falsely sweet. "That should hold you."
She puts her torch down and walks around me, checking from all angles, then produces a large knife-one from our kitchen!-and lays it by my head. The beast tries to howl but can't. Juni strolls to the wall of the cave, where the crack I created runs up near the icy waterfall. She stares at the ice, then at me, troubled. Shakes her head and chants a spell. I listen for a few minutes.
When the spell shows no sign of ending, I say without opening my eyes, "Is there a fast-forward button on this thing?"
"What's happening?" Beranabus asks.
"I'm in the cave. I've turned. Juni's crafting some long-winded spell."
"Probably calling Lord Loss," Beranabus notes. "Very well. Try this."
He teaches me some new words. Once I've repeated them, the picture fades out, then, after some static and crackling, tunes back in. Juni's still chanting, but she's standing over me now. No sign of Lord Loss, but the wall is red and yellow around the crack and the ice is melting, becoming a normal waterfall again. The heat in the cave is vicious. The beast I've become is sweating.
Juni's holding up the knife. She bends, presses it to the left side of my throat, makes a quick swipe. Blood spurts, drenching the blade. I go stiff, both as the werewolf in the past and me in the present. But then Juni puts her face to the cut, breathes on it and the wound closes. She moves the blade to the other side of my throat and does the same thing. Then she takes the red blade to the crack in the wall.
"What's happening?" Beranabus asks, and I describe the scene to him. "Strange. I never heard of a demon being summoned that way. But Lord Loss is unique. Nobody knows why he's the only demon master who can cross to our world, or how he does it. This must be a method he taught her."
Juni smears my blood down one side of the rock within the crack, then the other. She steps back and chants more spells, louder, arms thrown wide. Finishes with a triumphant yowl, then leaps away from the crack, covering her eyes.
Nothing happens.
Juni lowers her arm and stares at the crack for a long time, then at the blade, then me. She walks across slowly and looks down, confused.
"Juni..." The word comes from deep within the rock. I place the voice straight away-Lord Loss. "Juni..." he calls again, distant, hungry, anxious.
Juni returns to the crack and talks quickly, softly. I can't hear what she says. But then Lord Loss hisses a name that chills me to the bone. "Billy Spleen..."
Juni bows, sets the knife down, looks at me and grins nastily. "Stay where you are, beastie. I'll be back for you soon."
She leaves, not bothering to take the torch.
On the floor the werewolf struggles to tear free of its magical constraints. After a while the beast goes still. Its hands start to glow. The glow spreads and sweeps up its arms, hits its face and chest, then radiates down its body and legs.
The werewolf stands and cocks its head as if listening to someone speak. Then, with a noise that sounds like a growl of agreement, it races for the exit and heads for the surface.
As the beast lurches through the forest, I fill Beranabus and Kernel in on what's happening. Beranabus is unsure what to make of Juni's behaviour. "She seems to have been trying to summon Lord Loss. For some reason the spell didn't work. But I don't see what difference the other boy's blood would make."
"I don't think she wanted Bill-E for the spell," I murmur. "And I don't think it failed. Lord Loss stopped her. He wanted Bill-E to be there when he crossed, so he could kill us both."
"Perhaps," Beranabus says, but he doesn't sound convinced.
The chase concludes. The beast arrives at Bill-E's house. The back door is open. The wolf bolts inside and finds Juni picking up the unconscious Bill-E Spleen. Ma and Pa Spleen are both dead. The werewolf howls at Juni. She drops Bill-E as the beast leaps. They fight, my transformed self ripping at the albino with its teeth and claws, Juni fighting back physically, no time for spells. She screams my name and the beast roars. Juni screams my name again and again, each time adding more distress to the cry.
Finally, after a minute of Juni screaming, the werewolf releases her. She staggers back, bloody and stunned. The beast growls angrily, standing firmly between Juni and Bill-E, protecting the otherwise defenceless boy Then the view goes blurry. I sense the creature changing. Juni sighs with relief, then spreads her hands and talks quickly, faking concern. "Grubbs?" she gasps. "Is that you?"
I open my eyes and the screen disappears inside my head. I stare at Beranabus, open mouthed. "I didn't kill them," I whisper. "I tried to save them. I protected Bill-E. I didn't kill them." The last sentence comes out as a sob. I bend over and weep with relief, all else forgotten, eternally grateful to be innocent Grubbs Grady again-not the loathsome killer that I mistakenly believed I was.
