There is a brief moment when I am lying on the floor of the interstellar craft. I feel Alanda and Gaia close. It is possible Alanda even calls my name. She must know I have successfully completed my mission. She must be waiting for me, to smile at me, to take me to other worlds, into a glorious future.
But my battle with Landulf has taken something from me.
Finally I am tired of such adventures.
As Yaksha finally grew weary, I also crave a change.
Before Alanda can call me back to the present moment, I focus my entire being on another page of history. I return to the first vampire, the strange night Yaksha was born, five thousand years ago in India, when I was a girl of seven years. The Aghoran ceremony has ended and the evil priest has been killed by Amba's animated corpse. The corpse finally lies down but there is movement inside Amba's belly, which is still swollen with the nine-month-old fetus she was carrying when she died. My father takes his knife and goes to cut out the unborn child trapped in the womb. I leap from my hiding place behind the bushes.
"Father!" I cry, as I reach for his hand that holds the knife. "Do not let that child come into the world. Amba is dead, see with your own eyes. Her child must likewise be dead. Please, Father, listen to me."
Naturally, all the men are surprised to see me, never mind hear what I have to say. My father is angry with me, but he kneels and speaks to me patiently.
"Sita," he says, "your friend does appear dead, and we were wrong to let this priest use her body in this way. But he has paid for his evil karma with his own life. But we would be creating evil karma of our own if we do not try to save the life of this child. You remember when Sashi was born, how her mother died before she came into the world? It sometimes happens that a living child is born to a dead woman."
"No, "I protest. "That was different. Sashi was born just as his mother died. Amba has been dead since early dawn. Nothing living can come out of her."
My father gestures with his knife to the squirming life inside Amba's bloody abdomen. "Then how do you explain the life here?"
"That is the yashini moving inside her," I say. "You saw how the demon smiled at us before it departed. It intends to trick us. It is not gone. It has entered into the child."
My father ponders my words with a grave expres?sion. He knows I am intelligent for my age, and occasionally asks my advice. He looks to the other men for guidance, but they are evenly divided. Some want to use the knife to stab the life moving inside Amba. Others are afraid, like my father, of committing a sin. Finally my father turns back to me and hands me the knife.
"You knew Amba better than any of us," he says. "You would best know if this life that moves inside her is evil or good. If you know for sure in your heart that it is evil, then strike it dead. None of the men here will blame you for the act."
I am appalled. I am still a child and my father is asking me to commit an atrocious act. But my father is wiser than I have taken him for. He shakes his head as I stare at him in amazement, and he moves to take back the knife.
But I don't give the knife to him.
I know in my heart what I must do.
I stab the blade deep into Amba's baby.
Black blood gushes over my hands.
But it is only the blood of one. Not thousands.
The creature inside Amba's body stops moving.
Alanda turns to Gaia after studying her friend's body. They are not in a spaceship, but stand in the desert at night beside a clear pond. Many stars shine overhead.
"She is not breathing," Alanda says. "Her heart has stopped."
"But she stopped him," Gaia says, who actually can speak in his own way. "The path is now clear for many."
Alanda glances down at her friend. There is sorrow in her voice. "But she was coming back to us," she says.
Gaia comforts her. "She always went her own path. Let her go this way."
Yet Alanda later sheds a tear as they slide her friend's body into the pond. For a moment her friend floats on the surface of the water, and the reflection of the stars frame her figure. And when Alanda glances up, she sees the same outline in the heavens. For a moment her friend is constellation and it gives her a measure of comfort. But when Alanda looks back down, her friend has sunk beneath the mirror of the water and is gone.
"It is like she never was," Alanda whispers.
"It is like that for all of us," Gaia says.
One moonless night, when I am twenty years of age, I am awakened by a sound outside. Besides me sleeps my husband, Rama, and on my other side is our daughter, Lalita. I don't know why the sound wakes me. It was not loud. But it was peculiar, the sound of nails scraping over a blade. I get up and go outside my house and stand in the dark and look around.
For a long time I stand there, expecting to meet someone.
But there is no one there.
Finally I return to my bed and fall asleep.
The next morning I am playing with my Lalita by the river when a strange man comes by. He is tall and powerfully built. In his right hand he holds a lotus flower, in his left a gold flute. His legs are long and his every movement is bewitching. I cannot help but stare at him, and I am delighted when he comes and kneels beside me on the bank of the river. For some reason, I know he means me no harm.
"Hello," he says, staring at the water. "How are you?"
"I am fine." I pause. "Do I know you, sir?"
A faint smile touches his lips. "Yes. We have met before."
I hesitate. He does seem familiar but I cannot place him.
"I am sorry, I don't remember," I say.
He finally looks at me and his eyes are very blue. They remind me of the stars at night; they seem to sparkle with light from the heavens. "My name is Krishna," he says.
I bow my head. "I am Sita. This is my daughter, Lalita. Are you new to this area?"
He turns back to the water. "I have been here before."
"Is there anything I can do for you? Would you like some food?"
He glances at me, out the corners of his eyes, and I feel a thrill in my heart. There is such love in his glance, I don't understand how it can be so. "I was wondering if I could do anything for you, Sita," he says.
"My Lord?" I ask, and I feel he is deserving of the title.
He shrugs faintly. "I merely came to see if you were happy. If you are, then I will be on my way."
I have to laugh. "My Lord, I am not long married. My husband is a wonderful man whom I love dearly and God has seen fit to grace us with a beautiful child. We are all healthy and have plenty to eat. I cannot imagine being any happier than I am right now."
He nods briefly and then stands. "Then I will say goodbye, Sita."
But I jump up. "You came all the way here just to see if I was happy?"
"Yes." His eyes are kind as he looks at me for the last time. "Your happiness is all that matters to me. Remember me, Sita."
Then he walks away and I never see him again.
But I never forget him. Krishna.