“Showing you,” he rasped, the moment before she felt his mouth there, his tongue tasting, licking, sampling her like she was some treat.
She bit her lip to stop from crying out at the sheer sinful shock of it. Then his mouth found the tiny nub buried in her folds. She couldn’t describe the wonder of it. She arched off the bed with a strangled shout as his lips sucked.
The waves were back, crashing over her. Hot sensation rolled through her again and again. Still, he didn’t stop, continued working his mouth over her like a man on a mission. She writhed like she was on fire beneath him, and she was. She’d never imagined anything like this was even possible—pleasure so acute, so swift and sharp. A pleasure so intense it bordered on pain.
Finally, she drifted back down and he slowed, easing himself away, collapsing at her side.
After some moments, she found her voice in her parched throat. “Why?”
Why didn’t you take me, satisfy your own lusts on my body? Why did you only give?
He didn’t say anything at first and she thought she was going to be left wondering.
Then he rose from the bed, speaking as he moved to don his clothes. “I just wanted you to know.”
Even in the shadowy room, she could identify his state of arousal. It would be hard to miss. The sight of it alone brought the ache back between her legs. Her body, it seemed, knew there was still more he had to show her.
She pulled the sheet around her n**ed body. “Know what?”
“That not every man is a ravening beast intent on taking his pleasure. That I can control myself.” He stopped and came over her suddenly, his flexing arms braced on either side of her. “You can trust me. Some things—like the number of children you have—can be controlled.”
He was so close. She found herself straining for his mouth again. And then he was gone from her, shoving off the bed. He pulled on his boots and left the room.
She sat there for a long moment, the sheet hugged to her chest as she wondered how in the span of one day she had come to this point—a woman seriously considering marrying the exact type of man she’d sworn off. A man that could be her total undoing.
She fell back on the bed and inhaled deeply, which only brought the warm, musky scent of him washing over her anew. A rush of longing swept over that she quickly stamped down. This wasn’t supposed to be about her. About her wants and desires. She was supposed to be looking out for her family.
She was her mother’s daughter, after all, it seemed—quick to lose her head for a handsome man. It should panic her, but oddly she only felt a small frisson of unease. The need to make a decision weighed on her. She kept hearing his words: You can trust me. Some things—like the number of children you have—can be controlled.
Was that true? She was of a mind to trust him and yet it was so difficult to release her demons and let herself go.
Let herself fall.
Chapter Eighteen
Logan walked Cleo to the front door of her father’s Mayfair mansion, her scent filling his nose. He felt conspicuous as he carried her valise. Even in the dark of night, eyes followed them. Servants peering from windows, people passing in carriages. Anyone who looked at them could see they’d been traveling together. Alone. He wondered if this occurred to her, too. Whether it concerned her in the least. Somehow he didn’t think so. Nothing that happened between them last night or this morning appeared to alter her determination not to wed him.
He’d left his horse in the drive alongside the nag he’d acquired for her to ride the rest of the way to Town. A groom rushed to attend to the beasts. She didn’t bother knocking at Hadley’s front door, simply strode inside.
He stepped behind her, fully intending to follow her, but once over the threshold she turned around and stopped, preventing him from going any further. Apparently, she didn’t wish him to join her inside.
He glared down at her, undeniably annoyed. He felt like a lad of thirteen again when Marlena, the young widow from the village, a very worldly nineteen-year-old, had brushed him off after introducing him to the wonders of the female body. He was too old, had seen too much to feel like this.
“I’d like to speak to your father.”
“I know you would,” she said evenly, giving a brisk nod. “I’ll talk to him myself. Explain everything.”
Suspicion knotted his stomach. Specifically regarding whether she would actually explain everything. Such as how ruined she was . . . and that he wanted to set it to rights and wed her. He glanced beyond her as if he might spot her father. “You can’t stop me from talking to him.”
She nodded again, the motion swift. “He won’t like hearing what happened. It’s best if it comes from me. He sets a lot of store in such things.”
“Things like your reputation?” he bit out. “Fathers tend to do that.”
She winced. “Let me break it to him first. Then you can pay us a call tomorrow.”
He angled his head, studying her closely. “What are you saying, Cleo?”
Her chest lifted on a deep breath. “I’ll marry you.”
His chest eased and loosened. He had to stop himself from grinning like a fool. Especially considering she looked as grim as an undertaker.
She leaned in closer, clutching the edge of the door. “You said I could trust you.”
He nodded at her whisper. “You can.”
Her eyes locked on his, soulful and deep . . . almost pleading. “I’m counting on that. Don’t expect me to be a real wife.”
The tightness came back again, seizing his chest. “What can I expect then?”
“I’ll try . . . but—” She licked her lips and looked over her shoulder. “Intimacy will be . . . infrequent.” Her eyes searched his face, and he read the fear there, the uncertainty. Accepting him was at great cost to her. “And you said there were ways to avoid—” Her voice dipped so low he could scarcely hear her. “Children . . .”
He nodded slowly. She was telling him she might never want children. It wounded more than he expected. And yet not enough to turn away from her. He wanted her. At any cost.
He wasn’t one of those men determined to populate the earth with his progeny. He had brothers. His family line would doubtlessly stay within his immediate family. He reminded himself that his goal coming here was to secure an heiress. It wasn’t to find himself a broodmare.
He covered her hand where it clutched the edge of the door, her slight fingers smooth beneath his own. “I won’t demand it of you. I’ll honor your wish.”
She released a rattling breath, her expression relieved. With a shaky smile, she slid her hand out from his and closed the door. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
The door clicked shut. He stared at it for some moments before turning and walking down the steps.
He’d won his heiress, but he felt no triumph. He hadn’t won Cleo.
Not yet.
“Cleo!” Her father’s voice boomed across the foyer before she had managed two steps from the door. “You’ve returned!”
She jumped and turned to face Jack guiltily. Partly because she’d just shoved Logan from the house like some dirty little secret. And partly because she’d hoped to escape upstairs and compose herself before confronting him.
He advanced on her with an anxious expression on his face. “I didn’t think Dobson would fetch you this quickly, but all the better. Come. She’s in the drawing room.”
Her father was expecting her? He’d sent Dobson to fetch her home? “Who’s in the drawing room?”
Jack stopped and stared down at her. “Didn’t Dobson tell you?”
It appeared she would have to explain everything right now whether she liked it or not. “Dobson didn’t fetch me home. I returned on my own.”
Jack shook his head. “Thrumgoodie decided to return early?”
“Um, not precisely.”
He looked from her to the door, as though he might find the explanation of how she’d gotten here written upon it.
“Lord McKinney brought me back.”
“McKinney? You traveled alone with him?” Jack’s ruddy complexion darkened, no doubt grasping the implications of this scenario. “Whatever for?”
“I didn’t have a choice.”
His head cocked to the side. “How’s that?”
“You see . . . we were caught.” She bit her lip. Releasing the bruised flesh, she added, “In a rather comprising situation. In my bedchamber.”
Jack gaped.
“Thrumgoodie was quite upset, as you can imagine.” She saw no point in explaining that she’d been engaged to the earl up until that disastrous moment. It would only make Jack’s disappointment more acute. “Hamilton saw fit to kick me and Lord McKinney from his house.”
“I’ll kill him.”
“Now, Jack.” She rested her hand on his arm. “I’m a grown woman and responsible for my actions. You can’t blame Logan any more than you can blame me.”
Jack’s eyes snapped fire. “I’m not talking about McKinney—although he’ll have some explaining to do as well. I’m talking about Hamilton. And Thrumgoodie for that matter. How dare they boot you from the house as if you were some common trash? Thrumgoodie escorted you. I don’t care what you did! The man should have seen you safely home.”
She squeezed his arm, trying to calm him. “No harm done. And I couldn’t really bear to stay in that house a moment longer . . . not after being caught with Logan like that.”
Her father huffed and looked down at her. “Logan, is it?”
Her cheeks heated. She managed a nod.
“You care about him?”
She blinked. Partly because the question was so unexpected from Jack. She never expected him to care one way or another. And partly because she didn’t wish to consider the notion. She couldn’t care for Logan. That would be . . . bad. Bad for her control when it came to keeping him at arm’s length.
“I-I suppose. Yes. I do,” she answered, guessing that was the answer that would most appease Jack. She couldn’t explain her complicated relationship with Logan to him.
He nodded as though satisfied. “I’m assuming he intends to salvage your reputation and—”
“Yes, he’s offered.”
He waved an arm widely. “Then where is he?”
“I insisted he call on you tomorrow. After you and I had spoken.”
He grunted and tugged his jacket down his barrel frame. “Very well. A Scottish lord isn’t what I’d hoped for you, but it’s something at least.”
Her lips twisted. Of course, she couldn’t forget her father’s mission was to see his daughters well wed. She and Marguerite might not have scored the best matches in his estimation, but at least Grier had not disappointed him.
He clapped his hands. “Come now. I’ve a surprise for you.”
He took her elbow and guided her to the drawing room. She followed, curious to meet the mysterious “she” he’d referred to.
He pushed open one of the double doors with a flourish. Immediately, Cleo’s gaze landed on the female knitting quietly on the sofa, her expression soft and serene, but with a lingering sadness.
She wore a drab dress of wool. It did nothing to compliment her rather pudgy shape—or the bland brown hair pulled back into an equally bland bun.
“Cleo, allow me to present Annalise.”
The young woman hastily dropped her needlework and rose to her feet, her expression hopeful and anxious as she gazed at Cleo. A faint awareness tingled at the back of her neck, tightening her skin as she stared at the girl. She almost felt as though she knew her . . . that perhaps they’d met before.
Annalise took a few steps in Cleo’s direction. As she did so, Cleo saw she moved with a slight limp. Annalise trained her large brown eyes on Cleo. Brown like the rest of her except that they were large and lovely, framed with remarkably long lashes. They were quite her best feature—extraordinary really.