Christian followed Carolyn off the ladder onto_ the platform. When she moved to peer over the rail, he followed, noting that the ground looked a long way down.
The pamphlet had said they'd be as high as 150 feet. His gaze slid over the wild beauty surrounding them and then to Carolyn's pale face and he asked with concern, "Are you sure you want to do this?
She glanced to him and managed a laugh. "Why? Do I look terrified?"
"A bit," he admitted gently.
Smiling, she shrugged. "I'm just nervous because I've never done this before. I'll be fine once I get going," she assured him and stepped up to the guide to allow him to clip her harness to the cable.
Christian listened absently as the guide told her to sit and stick her legs straight out in front of her. He then gave her instructions on keeping her right arm behind the pulley, and lightly grasping the cable with her gloved hand to help keep herself steady. Carolyn was nodding, but she still looked pale and Christian was about to ask again if she was sure she wanted to do this when the guide suddenly released her and Carolyn went zipping away.
He expected her to shriek her head off all the way across, so was amazed when a happy "weeee" sounded that lasted the entire ten seconds before she reached the next platform, and Christian relaxed and found himself grinning as he stepped forward for his turn. His woman had surprised him again. There was more to Christiana Carolyn Johnson Carver Connor than first met the eye, but then perhaps he should have expected as much from a woman who carried so many names, he thought as he was suddenly sailing through the sky toward the platform where she waited.
"Isn't it a blast?" Carolyn cried, hopping up and down beside him as the guide worked to free him from the cable. "Oh my God, we have to do this again."
Christian chuckled at her enthusiasm, as he was freed.
"We will. There are something like eight or nine more platforms."
"Yeah. But I mean another day even," she said quickly.
"Every day. We should do this every day we're here."
Christian laughed and urged her out of the way as they waited for the rest of their party, but paused when she said, "This is better than sex."
That was damned insulting, considering they'd had sex three times in their sleep last night, and he'd thought it had been damned hot. As instructed he'd ensured that the first dream moved to her stoop and he'd happily repeated what had happened in real life, but even more happily had completed it pretty much the way his mother had suggested he would, but taking a little more time and care about it.
"Well, except for dream sex."
Christian barely caught the mutter and asked quickly, "What?"
"Nothing," she said flushing, but he'd heard her and it soothed his hurt ego and returned his good mood for the rest of the zip-line adventure.
"I think I'm going to try the pistachio-crusted chicken breast."
Christian glanced up from his menu at Carolyn's words and smiled. It had been after noon when they'd returned from zip-lining and they'd decided to hire a car and head into town for lunch. Genie had sent for a car for them and they'd asked the driver about restaurants during the ride.
He'd delivered them here, to this lovely, open-air pavilion on the seaside with artwork littered about and benches heaped with pillows.
"Sounds good," Christian decided, setting his menu aside.
"You always order what I order," Carolyn said on a laugh.
Christian shrugged. "And I always like it."
"Hmm," she said with amusement. "Well, if we have room for dessert, do me a favor and order the chocolate banana cake."
He quirked an eyebrow. "Why?"
"Because I'm going to order the apple strudel, but I want to try the chocolate banana too. We can share."
"Sounds good," Christian repeated which made her laugh and shake her head as the waiter arrived. He poured them each an icy glass of water, took their order and slipped away, and Carolyn sat back against the pillow on her bench seat with a pleased little sigh. She glanced around at their picturesque surroundings, and then turned back and blurted out, "Beth wants me to have an affair while I'm here."
Christian raised an eyebrow and teased, "Here? The benches look comfortable, but I think the other restaurant guests might not appreciate it."
Carolyn blinked, flushed, and then tossed her napkin at him. "Not here, here. In St. Lucia, smarty-pants."
"Oh," he drawled with a grin and then asked, "How's she feeling, by the way?"
"Well, she wasn't retching this morning for a change, so I think she may be turning a corner," Carolyn said, and then grimaced and added, "I sincerely hope so since the cruise to Soufriere is tomorrow."
Christian nodded mildly, hoping she wasn't. If Bethany was better and they went on the cruise it meant he wouldn't get to see Carolyn all day. He'd already checked into getting a ticket on the day sail, but had been told it was fully booked. It was apparently a popular cruise.
"Anyway, she's been bugging me about this vacation fling thing," Carolyn said, returning to the subject she'd brought up.
"And how do you feel about it?" he asked. She seemed to want to talk about it.
"I'm not sure," she admitted, biting her lip. "At first I was totally against it."
His eyes narrowed. "But now?"
"Well, I've been thinking about what you said last night..."
"What I said?" he asked uncertainly.
"You know, when we had to kiss? And you said to think of it like practice for when I met someone I wanted for a mate or whatever."
Christian just blinked at her. She was completely relaxed about their kiss the night before which was rather unexpected considering her reactions to everything the first night. His mother had said she'd veiled things and made her think it was a pleasant kiss so that she would be comfortable with it, but he hadn't expected this much comfort. What the hell had Marguerite done? He wondered and then recalled that Julius had said Carolyn hadn't experienced real passion and that in her mind her husband's kisses had been pleasant. Cripes, he thought picking up his glass of water, his mother had made the memory of their kiss a milk toast event.
"How am I at kissing?"
Caught by surprise, Christian choked on the water he was drinking and spat it everywhere during the coughing fit that followed.
"Oh, dear. That bad?" Carolyn asked dryly, helping him to mop up the mess he'd made when he finally stopped coughing.
"No, of course not," he snapped and then sat back in his seat to stare at her. "What the hell does that have to do with Bethany wanting you to have an affair?"
"Well, like you said, kissing you is practice. But so would an affair be." When his eyes widened incredulously, she rushed on, "I mean, I haven't got a lot of experience and five years of sexual rejection from my husband-"
"I thought it was seven years," he interrupted with a frown.
"It's seven years since I've had sex. We've been separated for two though," she pointed out.
"Oh, right," Christian muttered.
"Anyway, that hasn't exactly left me feeling confident in my attractiveness or skill in that area," she said with a grimace. "I mean, frankly, up until now I haven't even considered ever getting involved with a man again.
I figured I'd just work and get a cat for company-or a hundred," she muttered with a self-derision he didn't understand.
"And just grow old and wait to die, I guess."
Christian frowned at the depression that settled over her, wanting to reassure her that she definitely wasn't going to grow old alone with nothing but cats. Hell, if he had it his way, she wouldn't grow old at all. But he couldn't say any of that, of course, so bit his tongue and waited.
Still he was surprised when she suddenly brightened and said, "But now I'm thinking maybe it doesn't have to be that way."
"Oh?" he asked warily.
She nodded and leaned forward eagerly. "I think I've hit early menopause."
Christian blinked several times. "Huh?"
"I'm having these dreams at night," Carolyn admitted, flushing.
"Oh?" he repeated, one eyebrow sliding up his forehead.
He knew exactly what dreams she was talking about, but he wasn't supposed to. Besides she looked half-embarrassed and half-eager and wholly adorable and he just wanted to hear her admit to having sex dreams.
"What kind of dreams?"
"Er..," Her flush deepened, but she straightened her shoulders and admitted in a whisper, "Wet dreams, and they're really... um... steamy," she admitted turning an even brighter red and then rushed on, "And I've never had them before so it must be menopause. Right?"
"Steamy, huh?" Christian asked. They hadn't just been steamy for him. They'd been hot as hell. Widening his eyes innocently, he asked, "Who was in them?"
"Er," she said again, and then dropped her gaze and waved her hand vaguely, "Oh, just some celebrity sort."
"Like Brad Pitt?" he asked, feeling bad for making her uncomfortable and thinking to offer her an easy lie, but she recoiled in horror at the suggestion.
"Oh, good lord, no! He isn't hot. I mean I suppose he is, but he isn't as hot as-And he's a blond," she said, her voice rising as she cut herself off.
"Ah." Christian bit his lip. She thought he was hotter than Brad Pitt. Gia said every woman on the planet wanted Brad Pitt. But he was hotter to Carolyn. God, he loved her.
The thought resounded like a gong through the sudden dead silence in his head. Christ, had he really just thought that? Yes he had, Christian acknowledged, but supposed he shouldn't be surprised. She was his lifemate. It was inevitable that he'd come to love her. But up until now he'd just been thinking lustful, claim-her-and-make-her-his thoughts. He hadn't expected these other softer feelings to creep up on him so quickly.
"Anyway, aside from the dreams I think I'm having hot flashes." Carolyn's words caught his attention.
"Hot flashes?" he echoed uncertainly. She was far too young to have hot flashes, wasn't she? He didn't know. It wasn't something often discussed among his people, but it was on the news on occasion and he'd always thought it hit later.
"Yeah," Carolyn said with a sigh. "At least I think so.
I woke up last night in a terrible sweat and... er... all worked up."
Well, that explained the abrupt end to the third and final sexual dream they'd shared last night, he thought. It had stopped abruptly, stirring him from sleep and leaving him too frustrated and wound up to sleep again.
"I was shaking too and kind of panicky," Carolyn said with a frown. "It was a bit scary, actually, but it got better after I got up and had something to eat." She grimaced at the memory. "Anyway, I think it must have been a hot flash, although I don't recall reading anything about anxiety and shaking with hot flashes."
"So," Christian said and paused when his voice came out a husky growl, cleared his throat, and tried again, "So, having these dreams and... er... hot flashes has made you decide maybe you want to have an affair?"
"Well, there're your kisses too," she said with an embarrassed laugh.
"My kisses?" he asked with interest.
Expression turning solemn, she nodded. "I know you're gay, and you would be far too young for me even if you weren't, Christian.
I know better than to be attracted to you or anything."
"Er," he muttered, not sure how he was supposed to respond to that one.
"But you are a very good kisser," Carolyn assured him.
"Er," he said again, but he was grinning this time.
"And I've decided I like kissing, and want more of it," she announced.
Christian continued to grin until she rushed on, "But with a straight man my own age, of course. I mean I know you and I will probably have to kiss again while you're here, for your brother's sake, and I honestly don't mind.
It's good practice, like you said, but it makes me think I might want to find someone else to kiss me too."
"What?" Christian scowled.
"Well, not while I'm helping you, of course," she reassured him. "I mean, it's not like I'd find anyone at honeymoon hell anyway. But I'm thinking that after you guys leave, Bethany and I should move to another resort, one where there are more single men, and then I can practice kissing and other stuff."
"What other stuff?" he asked, outraged.
"Well... you know," she said, with a grimace. "Other stuff."
Christian scowled at her for the very suggestion, but she wasn't paying attention. She was peering thoughtfully upward, several expressions flitting across her face. "Although, you know, now that I think about it, maybe we don't have to wait until the end of the week."
"What?" he asked with dismay.
"Well, think about it," she said cheerfully, her gaze returning to his. "If Bethany and I were to move to another resort, you could tell them you were coming to see me and we could hit the nightclubs and pick up guys together."
"Pick up guys together!" he cried, and then glanced around when she shushed him. Several people were looking their way. He scowled at them briefly, but turned back and lowered his voice. "Let me get this straight... a day or two ago you were totally not interested in a fling, but a couple of dreams and hot flashes later and you're ready to go out and-"
"Well, they're very hot dreams," Carolyn said almost apologetically. "I mean, if the real thing is even half as nice, it's miles ahead of anything I've experienced." She paused and then admitted, "I don't think Robert was very good at it. Which means I probably haven't got a clue. I mean some of the things in those dreams... " She flushed and waved her hand in front of her face. "I don't even know where they came from. I mean, you-"
She paused abruptly, looking alarmed, and then cleared her throat. "I mean, the guy in the dreams seemed to really know his business. But of course, that was my mind." She sighed.
"It must come from books I've read or something. I usually skip the sex scenes, but I must have picked up a thing or two in the few I've read." Carolyn glanced at him.
"But, still, a dream is one thing and real life is another."
"Exactly," Christian said firmly.
Relief coursed through him, until she added, "So, it seems to me it might be best to get the nerve-wracking and awkward first time or twelve out of the way with someone I'm never likely to run into again."
Christian gaped. He'd created a monster. Not that her wanting to explore her sexuality made her a monster, but she was supposed to want to explore it with him, dammit.
Of course, that was impossible since she thought he was gay, he supposed.
Jesus, what had his family done to him? And what the hell was she doing discussing this with him anyway? She wasn't comfortable wanting him, but was burbling on cheerfully about menopause and wet dreams and having a fling or twelve with some guy she hadn't even yet met?
Obviously, she'd totally accepted him as gay. He'd completely replaced her buddy, Brent, who she'd once said she could discuss anything with. Again, what had his family done to him?
"Don't you think?" Carolyn asked, drawing him from his increasingly agitated thoughts.
"No, I don't," he snapped.
"You don't?" she asked, her shoulders drooping with disappointment, but then said, "Wait, what don't you think? That I should move to another resort? Or that I should have a fling?"
"Either," he growled. At least not with anyone but him, and then it wouldn't be a fling. He wanted her for life.
"Well..." Carolyn sat back blinking, and then almost whined, "Why not?"
Christian frowned. He couldn't tell her the truth, and without that he didn't have a single good goddamned reason to give her. And then it came to him, and calm flooded him, his agitation leaving him as he said, "Carolyn, you obviously aren't the type of woman to run around having flings."
"But I can change. I want to be that kind of woman," she said at once.
"What kind of woman exactly do you think that is?" he asked staying calm.
"Confident and sexy and comfortable in herself," Carolyn said at once. "The kind of woman who has sex on a beach, or up against a door, or in the wading pool, or on the terrace rail under the moonlight."
Yeah, that had been pretty hot, Christian thought with a little sigh of remembrance. The moonlight had shone down on her passion-filled face as he'd-Christian shook his head, and cleared his throat to say, "That's passion, not confidence or being comfortable with oneself. And do you really think you'll find that with some stranger you meet at a nightclub?"
"Well, why not? Even you manage to stir some passion in me and you're gay," she said grimly. "There must be loads of it in me somewhere. Surely a straight man could stir up even more?"
Christian ground his teeth, sure if she mentioned his supposedly being gay one more time, he'd-"
Pistachio-encrusted chicken breast for two."
Christian glanced up at that announcement, and immediately sat back for the waiter to set down their dishes.
Once the man had gone, he suggested, "Why don't we shelve this conversation for right now and enjoy lunch?"
Carolyn didn't protest, but her jaw was set as she picked up her fork and began to pick at her food. She was angry and disappointed by his lack of support, Christian realized, and was suddenly worried. So long as she was willing to talk to him about it, he would have some warning if the passion building between them, not to mention the sexual frustration, moved her to do something stupid... and he could prevent her doing something she'd regret. However if she got so annoyed she wouldn't share her thoughts and plans, he wouldn't have that opportunity.
Christian considered the matter as they ate their main dish, and when the plates were taken away, said, "I'm sorry. You're an adult, and know what you want. However, I just worry that you might rush headlong into something when going slow might be easier for you. I mean, you said yourself that you think the first time will be awkward and nerve wracking and I don't think you're considering that.
It's not likely you're going to experience much passion in that state."
She frowned, but was listening, and Christian continued, "I mean, you're obviously comfortable with me...
and knowing I'm not likely to try to push you into bed, you relax which is probably why it allows your body to react as it does. And then in the dreams you're in control," sort of, he added to himself. "Your dream lover doesn't do anything to make you uncomfortable or rush ahead to...... er...... completion without exciting you first." At least he knew that was true. Carolyn was definitely with him every step of the way in the dreams, including orgasm...... well, when they weren't interrupted, he thought and wondered if she was buying any of this tripe he was feeding her. It was hard to tell from her expression. "So, wouldn't it be better for you to wait until you're comfortable with someone and not rush out and pick up the first guy who looks your way in a bar?"
Carolyn, sat back with a sigh. "I suppose."
Christian almost melted into his seat his relief was so strong. But then he glanced to the side as their waiter appeared with their desserts. When the man left again, Carolyn and Christian arranged the plates in the middle of the table between them to share.
"So," Carolyn said on a sigh as she scooped up a bite of apple strudel. "What are you going to do tomorrow while Bethany and I are on the cruise? If she's feeling up to it," she added, rolling her eyes.
Christian relaxed and smiled. She wasn't angry anymore.
That knowledge stirred a relief in him like none he'd ever experienced.
Carolyn closed the villa door and turned to carry her bags to her room, but paused abruptly when she spotted Bethany at the top of the stairs in a bathing suit.
"You're up," she said with surprise. "And obviously feeling better."
"Yes." Bethany grinned, moving forward to help her with her bags. "I think it's finally done."
"Well, great," Carolyn said with a smile. "Why don't you go get dressed? It's almost dinnertime. We could-"
"Oh no, I don't want to push it and risk not being ready for tomorrow's cruise," Bethany said at once, leading the way to Carolyn's room with half the bags. "Instead, I was thinking we could order room service and eat here, have a glass of wine by the pool, and maybe a swim under the stars. Relax for a bit. Then we could have an early night so we're both well-rested for tomorrow's cruise."
"Oh," Carolyn said with surprise, and bit her lip as she followed Bethany to set down the bags she carried.
"I'm so glad to be feeling better," Bethany said as she sank onto the side of the bed. "I've been alone so long I think I'm ready to start climbing the walls."
"Oh, of course you are," Carolyn said, guilt immediately claiming her. Turning, she bent to hug her, saying, "Honey, I'm sorry, I should have stayed and kept you company. I-"
"Don't be silly," Bethany laughed. "You offered, but I just didn't feel well enough for company. I mean, it's not like we could have talked anyway while I was hanging over the toilet," she pointed out with a grimace. "Still, I'm ready for company now... if you don't mind a quiet night in?"
"No, of course I don't mind," Carolyn assured her.
"That sounds lovely."
"Good." Bethany stood. "Then let's go look at the room service menu and you can show me what you bought while we wait for dinner to show up."
"You go ahead," Carolyn said, moving toward the bathroom. "I'll be right out."
"Okay, but hurry," Bethany said cheerfully. "I suspect it will take a while for dinner to get here."
"I will." Carolyn closed the bathroom door behind her.
Pausing then, she heaved a sigh and withdrew her phone.
She'd made plans to have dinner alone with Christian and then sit with Marguerite and Julius while the band played.
She'd have to call and cancel. Carolyn felt bad about it, but what could she do? She'd come here with Bethany.
Christian and the others were new friends. She owed her loyalty to Beth... whether she'd rather go out or not, she thought unhappily, as she called the main building and asked to be put through to Christian's villa.
Carolyn paced the large bathroom as she waited for someone to pick up the phone, and felt an odd sense of relief when she recognized Gia's voice saying hello.
"Hi, Gia. How are you?"
"Caro!" Gia greeted. "I'm good, but Christian's in the shower. Do you want me to see if he'll-"
"No, no, that's okay," Carolyn said quickly. "I'm afraid I was just calling to explain that Beth is feeling better."
"Oh, that's great," Gia said cheerfully. "I'll tell Christian when he gets out of the shower. He can call down and add another person to your reservation then."
"Uh, well," Carolyn dithered, but finally said, "Actually, no he doesn't have to do that. Bethany wants a nice quiet evening in and an early night so we can rest up for the cruise tomorrow."
There was a pause, and then Gia said, "I don't understand, if she isn't going to join you why-?"
"Well, that's the thing. She's feeling well enough that she wants company, so she suggested ordering in room service and relaxing here," Carolyn said quietly.
"Ah," Gia murmured. "So you're canceling on Christian."
Carolyn sighed as a wave of guilt assailed her, but said, "I'm afraid so."
"So he won't see you again until tomorrow night?" Gia asked.
"Uh, well..." Carolyn grimaced. "I'll have to call you back on that. It kind of depends on Bethany. I mean I came with her and can't just dump her to hang around with new friends. Especially when she's been so ill."
"Right," Gia breathed. "Well, have a nice night. You'll be missed."
"Thank you," Carolyn whispered and hung up. Letting her breath out slowly, she stared at herself silently in the bathroom mirror, wondering why she was suddenly so depressed.
Christian was whistling softly to himself as he walked into the kitchen to get a bag of blood. He'd grabbed two to take with him to the shower, but it had been another long day out in the heat with bits of sun here and there and he figured he needed a couple more before he left to collect Carolyn for dinner.
His whistling died slowly and his footsteps faltered halfway to the refrigerator when he spotted everyone standing around looking grim. Christian raised his eyebrows as his gaze slid over his parents and cousins.
"What's up?"
"Carolyn called," Marguerite said quietly and something about her solemn tone made worry slip through him.
"What's happened?" he asked sharply. "Is she all right?"
"Yes, she's fine," Marguerite said quickly, and then added reluctantly, "In fact, she called with good news...
It seems Bethany's feeling better."
Christian's eyes narrowed as the implications hit him one after another. His few days of having her to himself would be at an end. Either it would be he, Carolyn and Bethany, or it would be Carolyn and Bethany and he would be out.
"I'm afraid it's the latter," Julius said, obviously reading his mind. "At least for tonight and tomorrow. She called to cancel dinner. Bethany feels better but wants them both to stay in, and have an early night in preparation for tomorrow's sail... and Carolyn feels she has to do so."
Christian cursed and turned to jerk the fridge door open.
"It's all right, Christian, we can deal with this," Marguerite assured him.
"How are you going to deal with it, Mother?" he asked sharply, retrieving a bag of blood. "Carolyn isn't the sort to abandon a friend she's on vacation with. She's going to stay in tonight, then sail off tomorrow and-Christ," he muttered, suddenly slamming the door closed and turning to them with alarm. "Bethany will encourage her to continue with that cockamamie plan of hers and sleep with the first guy who looks at her cross-eyed."
"What?" Gia asked with surprise. "What plan?"
"Oh dear," Marguerite murmured, her gaze focused on his head and pulling out the information without his needing to say it. "I hadn't considered something like this coming up."
Nobody asked what she was talking about. Everyone was now focused on his head, no doubt retrieving his memories of the entire lunch conversation. It was certainly there on the surface for them to find, he thought grimly.
"Oh, man," Gia muttered.
Marguerite said. "It's all right. We can handle both problems very easily."
"How?" Christian asked grimly.
"Well, Bethany is a simple matter of distraction. We have one of the boys romance her a bit and keep her busy, freeing Carolyn to be with you," Marguerite pointed out, smiling.
"I'll do it," Zanipolo offered at once. No one was terribly surprised. He was still into sex with mortals and something of a slut as Christian had said. But Marguerite shook her head.
"Thank you, Zanipolo, but I think Santo would be the better choice."
"Me?" Santo asked with shock. "Why me?"
"You have that mysterious silent man thing going for you and all that masculine virility. It will definitely distract any woman."
"I'm virile," Zanipolo protested at once.
"Yes, dear," Marguerite patted him soothingly. "I have another task for you."
"What's that?" he asked suddenly wary.
"You need to find an opportunity to kiss Carolyn."
"What?" Christian squawked.
"Well, it will kill any ridiculous notions she has that just any man can stir the passion in her that you do," she pointed out, moving to pat Christian's arm now.
"What?" Zanipolo cried. "I'm a good kisser."
"I'm sure you are," Marguerite said, turning to pat him again. "But the fact that Carolyn believed you might be the one in the band who was homosexual, suggests you are the one she finds least attractive, so-"
"What?" Zanipolo interrupted mournfully. "But why?
Women like me."
"Yes, dear, of course they do. You're very funny."
"Funny?" Zanipolo asked with horror.
"In a charming way," she assured him quickly.
"Women like amusing men."
"He's not kissing her," Christian said grimly.
"Now, Christian," Marguerite said, turning to pat him again. "Zanipolo-"
"Isn't laying a finger on my woman, let alone his filthy mouth," he snapped.
"Filthy?" Zanipolo turned on him with outrage.
Marguerite began to pat him again. "I'm sure Christian didn't mean-"
"The hell I didn't, his lips have been on more women than have died of cancer in all of history. And not just their damned lips. He's not kissing her."
"Now, Christian," Marguerite started to turn to him again, but Julius stepped forward and caught her arm.
"You're making me dizzy," he muttered, pulling her away. He then scowled at both young men. "Zanipolo, you'll kiss Carolyn. But no tongue, and no passion. And, Christian, you'll let him. Once she sees how lame his kisses are compared to yours, she'll give up this nonsense of taking a lover."
"Lame?" Zanipolo gaped. "I am not a lame kisser."
"Julius just means that the nanos aren't there with shared passion so they will seem lame," Marguerite said quickly.
"He's not going to kiss her," Christian repeated.
"Would you rather she kissed some random mortal?"
Marguerite asked.
"She's not kissing anyone but me," he said grimly.
"We're trying to help you here, Christian," Julius said impatiently.
"It's your bloody help that caused this in the first place," he snapped. "Telling her I'm gay of all things. I should just march down there right now and tell her the truth about everything."
"Do you think she's ready for that?" Julius asked quietly.
"She may be," Marguerite murmured, surprising everyone.
When Christian peered at her hopefully, she said, "She did feel comfortable enough to talk to him about sex." She frowned. "Of course, that may be just because she thinks he's gay and therefore safe, but I think if she isn't ready she's very close... Unfortunately, close isn't good enough. I'd rather you wait just a bit longer to be sure, son."
Christian shook his head. "I want to tell her everything and take my chances."
"In front of Bethany?" Julius asked.
"No, of course not, I'll ask Carolyn to come outside."
"And tell her on the stoop about immortals and lifemates and that she's yours?" he asked dryly.
Christian frowned with frustration.
"And what will you do if she runs?" Julius asked.
"Chase her," Christian said without hesitation.
"You can chase her, but you can't keep her if she's unwilling.
We'd have to wipe her memories of you, and you could never go near her again."
"What?" Christian gasped with horror.
"It's what is done," Marguerite said quietly. "We can't take the risk that she'd repeat what you've told her. It would endanger not just you, but our entire people."
"But you said Lucern, Bastien, and Etienne's women ran," he said desperately.
"Yes, but Kate, Terri and Jackie already loved them and wouldn't have turned them in. It would have ripped out their own hearts to harm them." She tilted her head and asked, "Does Carolyn love you already?"
Christian frowned. He'd realized today that he loved her, but...
"Do you want to take that chance?" she asked.
Christian sighed in defeat and shook his head. Not yet.
He wouldn't take the chance and lose her.
"Why not sleep on it tonight and wait and see what happens tomorrow?" Julius suggested sympathetically.
"If Bethany comes down to dinner, Santo can put the moves on her and act as a distraction."
"Put the moves on," Santo echoed dubiously.
"And you can get more time alone with Carolyn. If your mother's right, she's gaining trust, and she likes you.
Perhaps love isn't far behind."
"Right," Christian muttered, and finally slapped the bag of blood to his teeth.