Chapter 17
Beau
I decided to completely end things with Nicole. She wasn’t taking it well but Nicole wasn’t used to rejection. I stepped into the clearing and the loud music and familiar smell of burning pecan wood greeted me. I heard my name shouted a few times in greeting but I didn’t pay attention to who it was. I wasn’t here tonight to socialize. I’d come for one reason. There were other things I could have done tonight. But other things didn’t include getting a glimpse of Ashton. My world revolved around seeing her. If I knew she was going to be somewhere, I went. It was to the point where I was considering going to church on Sunday. I knew from hearing Sawyer talk about it, Ash sang solos most Sundays for the choir. I hadn’t heard her sweet voice sing in years.
“Is it true? Did you really break things off with Nicole?” I turned to see Kyle Jacobson walking up beside me grinning. He’d always had a thing for Nicole. I was about to make his night.
“Yep,” I replied, reaching for a dixie cup and filling it up with cold beer from the keg.
“So is she free game or are you going to bust a guy up if he goes after her?”
I took a swig of the beer and chuckled. I’d actually pay someone to get her off my back. The moment she realized I’d ditched her because I was in love with Ashton her claws were going to come out. I couldn’t let her hurt Ash.
“Man, she’s a free bird. Please be my guest.”
Kyle slapped me on the back. “HOT DAMN.”
If he only knew. The girl had issues a mile long. I nodded and continued to drink my beer, scanning the crowd for any sign of Ash.
The moment she stepped into the clearing holding Sawyer’s hand my heart sped up. Just seeing her made me a little crazy. I hated seeing her hand tucked in Sawyer’s but she wasn’t paying any attention to Sawyer. She was searching the crowd, for me. I threw my cup in the trash can and made my way over to them. Once I stepped out of the shadows her eyes found mine and a pleased smile lifted the corners of her mouth. Desire curled in my gut, making it hard not to go jerk her away from Sawyer and claim her as mine. He shouldn’t be touching her.
“Sawyer,” I said, nodding to my cousin before allowing myself to stare at Ashton some more. The tight jeans she wore clung to her hips while her flat, tanned stomach played peek-a-boo with the hem of her pale blue tank top. I knew exactly how soft that little strip of skin felt against my fingers. I lifted my eyes from her stomach to meet her gaze. “Ash.” I watched her blush prettily then duck her head and glance over at the person standing beside her through her lowered lashes. I followed her gaze and saw who could only be a grown-up version of Lana. She smiled at me but I could see it was forced. It took all my restraint to hold back a chuckle. I’d tormented the girl when we were kids but she was always so mean to Ash.
“Beau, you remember Lana. I believe you once handcuffed her to the dog fence and forced her to sing loudly for her release.”
Ashton’s introduction made me laugh. I couldn’t stop myself this time. I remember seeing Ashton’s head full of blonde curls peeking around the tree trunk at me, covering her mouth as her shoulder shook from laughter. I’d been so proud of myself for avenging her honor and making her laugh all at the same time. I met Ashton’s amused gaze, wishing for the millionth time things had gone differently and she was mine.
“I remember that. You tormented Lana so much it’s a wonder she didn’t run screaming when she saw you tonight.” Sawyer’s voice startled me. I’d forgotten he was standing there. I couldn’t think of much else with Ashton smiling up at me so sweetly.
I cleared my throat and turned my attention to Lana. “Ah, yes, but I believe you asked for it. You used to say some pretty harsh things to Ash and I never let anyone talk to Ash that way.”
Lana gave me a smile that said she knew more than she should. Had Ashton told her cousin about us? The idea she’d told someone about our summer together made me happier than it should. I wanted her to think about it. I wanted her to need to tell someone. Hell, I just wanted her.
“Where’s Nicole?” Sawyer asked, glancing over my shoulder as if expecting Nicole to latch onto me at any moment.
It took all my will power not to look at Ashton when I replied, “I broke it off with Nic. Don’t care where she is.” I wanted to see Ashton’s expression.
“Huh, really? I wasn’t expecting that. She isn’t pregnant, is she?” Sawyer’s accusation I’d broken up with Nicole because I’d knocked her up grated on my nerves. Had he always assumed the worst of me?
“No. It’s just over,” I replied in a harder tone than I usually used with him.
“Is there someone else?” Sawyer asked.
I wondered how he would react if I told him his girlfriend was the someone else. No doubt I’d lose him forever. His arm snaked around Ashton’s waist. Right now it was hard to remember he was my cousin. All I could focus on was the intense desire to rip the arm he was touching Ashton with off his body.
“Why don’t we go join the group over there and stop giving Beau the third degree?” This time I couldn’t help but look at Ashton. A smile touched her lips before she turned away from me and gazed up at Sawyer.
“You’re right, baby. I can grill him some other time,” Sawyer replied and winked at me before leading Ashton toward the group.
I stood there unable to follow them. Seeing her cuddled up against his side was painful. Breaking up with Nic had been the fair thing to do since I was only using her to cope but now there was no distraction to keep me from watching Sawyer with Ash.
“This may not be my business but the way you and Ashton keep staring at each other like you want to take a bite is going to eventually tip your cousin off. He’s a trusting person but I don’t think he’s stupid.”
I jerked my gaze off of Ashton and Sawyer’s retreating forms and turned to see Lana still standing there, frowning at me with her hands on her hips. What did she know?
“You’re right, it isn’t your business,” I snapped and started toward the keg. I needed another drink.
Ashton
Sawyer was going out of his way to make sure Lana felt comfortable with everyone. He had introduced her to the main core of his friends and even gone to get her a soda. It didn’t bother me. In fact it gave me time to watch Beau without distraction. Not having Nicole wrapped around him was a relief but it also made it almost impossible to take my eyes off of him. Beau caught me staring and winked. I bit my bottom lip to keep from laughing. A sharp elbow nudged me in the ribs, causing me to gasp and spin around to find the person the boney arm was attached to. Lana was smiling innocently at me.
“You’re being obvious,” she hissed, keeping a fake smile on her face. Her meaning, however, sunk in.
“I need to go to the car and get my phone. My mom’s probably called me ten times by now,” Lana announced.
“I’ll go with you,” I quickly replied, glancing up at Sawyer who seemed pleased I was being nice to my cousin. I used to seek out this sort of approval from him but now it annoyed me. If I didn’t like my cousin, I’d stomp on her foot just to piss him off.
Once we were safely out of the clearing and headed for the car Lana stopped walking and turned to glare at me. “You’ve about ten minutes or so to get yourself together before your knight in shining armor comes looking for us. I’m going to go get my phone and make a few phone calls.”
I frowned. “What do you mean?”
“I mean you need to stop openly flirting with Beau while the entire football team is around to witness it. It’s like you two think you’re the only ones out there. We all have eyes, you know.”
She spun around and headed deeper into the pecan orchard toward the parked cars.
“She’s got a point but it’s my fault.” Beau’s voice should have startled me but it didn’t. Somehow I knew he’d find a way to get me alone.
“Yes, it probably is,” I said teasingly as I turned around to meet his gaze.
Beau took a step toward me then ran his hand through his hair, muttering a curse.
“I want to rip his damn arms off his body, Ash. Sawyer, who I’d do anything for. I want to hurt him. If he touches you again in front of me I’m going to crack. I can’t take this.”
I closed the space between us and wrapped my arms around his waist. I’d done this. My need to be near Beau had created this impossible situation.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered against his chest, wishing I could make this all go away. He sighed and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me tighter up against him.
“Don’t be sorry. Just try not to let him touch you. When he touches you I see red. I can’t take it. I don’t want to see him or anyone else touch you.”
I pulled back just enough so I could gaze up at him. His jaw was clenched tightly. Knowing he was thinking of Sawyer with such ferocity made me feel so guilty. I hadn’t wanted to come between them yet I was doing it anyway.
“What can I do to make this right, Beau? I don’t want to come between y’all. It’s the main reason I’m doing this. He’s your family.”
Beau slipped his fingers into my hair and cradled my head.
“Staying with him. Letting him touch you, hold you—GOD. It’s eating me alive. You may be keeping Sawyer from hating me but you’re only making me hate him.”
I reached up and clasped his arms, pulling them away from my head as I stepped back. Tears blurred my vision. “What am I supposed to do, Beau? You tell me. What am I supposed to do?”
He opened his mouth to respond and closed it as his eyes settled on something over my left shoulder. A possessive gleam came into his eyes as if to warn off any predators that might get near what was his. I knew without turning around who he was glowering at so fiercely. I didn’t glance back at Sawyer. I wasn’t sure what to say.
“What’s going on? Ashton never yells at people. What in the crap did you do to her, Beau?”
“It’s my fault.” Lana’s voice had me snapping my head up from my defeated stance as I turned to gawk at her.
“What?” Beau and Sawyer said at the same time.
Lana gave us all a dramatic sigh and shrugged her shoulders. “Beau was flirting with me and Ash didn’t like it. She thinks he isn’t good enough for me or something. They started bickering when she told Beau to leave me alone.”
I couldn’t believe my ears. Had Lana just lied so believably for me and Beau?
She smiled and nibbled on her fingernail like some flirty bimbo and smirked. “What? Might as well tell him the truth. You don’t think his cousin is worthy of your cousin.”
I tore my gaze off my shy, meek cousin-turned-drama-queen to study Sawyer’s face. Was he actually falling for this? Surely not. He was frowning at Beau.
“Beau, leave Ash’s cousin alone. She’s not one of your one-nighters. Go find some other rebound girl. There’s no use getting Ash all worked up over this.”
Unbelievable.
I glanced over at Beau and his expression told me he was past furious. He was ready to kill Sawyer. I stepped in between them, putting my back to Sawyer and pleading with Beau silently. I mouthed the word ‘please’ and watched the anger ease some before he turned and stalked off deeper into the pecan orchard.
I needed to make sure he was okay but I couldn’t do that with Sawyer standing behind me waiting for me to return to the field with him. Back to playing pretend. Back to being miserable.
“You okay?” Sawyer asked, closing the distance between us and taking both my hands in his.
No. I wasn’t okay. I was never going to be okay. Beau was off in the dark, upset and angry. I was stuck here pretending with Sawyer. AND I’d made my saint of a cousin lie for me.
“I just want to go home. I’m not feeling well,” I said, hoping Sawyer didn’t read any more into it.
“Of course. No problem.” Sawyer turned his head toward Lana. “You okay? Sorry about Beau. He can be difficult at times. Just overlook him.”
“That’s okay. I’m fine, really,” Lana replied. I could hear the guilt in her voice. This was going to eat her up. She adored Sawyer. Knowing that she’d willingly lied to him for me made my eyes sting. I was causing everyone around me pain. All my bad decisions were snowballing. At some point I was going to have to take the blame and deal with the consequences. I couldn’t keep letting people I cared about take the blows for me. I didn’t like the person I was becoming.