Chapter 27
I figured what Beau didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him. I’d sat in my room debating over going to check on Sawyer for hours. Finally my conscience got the best of me and I’d driven over there. Facing his mother wasn’t high up on my list of things I wanted to do. This year or possibly ever. I passed by his driveway and turned down the dirt road leading down to the hole.
Once I got back there I parked the car and sent Sawyer a text letting him know I’d come to check on him. If he wanted to see me he would. While I waited I figured I would go enjoy our favorite childhood spot one last time.
Climbing up a tree wasn’t as easy as it used to be. But our favorite limb wasn’t as high as it used to be either and it just took one small boost from the tree trunk to get myself securely on the branch I’d shared with the Vincent boys during our childhood.
“Impressive. You made it look easy.” Sawyer’s voice surprised me. I glanced over to see him leaning against a nearby tree. His dark curls danced in the breeze, reminding me of the times I used to watch it do that exact same thing with fascination. I loved burying my fingers in his thick hair and wrapping his curls around them. He really was beautiful.
“I was already here when you sent the text,” he replied with an amused grin. My expression must have shown my confusion.
“Oh,” I replied.
“To what do I owe this visit?” he asked, standing up and walking over to stand beside my legs. He barely had to look up to meet my gaze.
“I wanted to check on you. Beau said you had a concussion.”
Sawyer chuckled and skipped a rock he’d been holding in his hand across the water. “He tell you how I got the concussion?”
“Yes,” I answered him, feeling guilty.
“I deserved it. I was shitty to you all week.”
Had Sawyer just cursed?
“Um . . .” I didn’t know what to say. He was right, he had been, but he didn’t deserve to be beat up by his brother over it.
“I shouldn’t have let them do those things to you. Honestly, Beau beating the crap out of me was a relief. I’d been beating myself up. Having someone physically beat me was a nice release.”
“What?” I asked.
Sawyer turned his blue eyes back up toward me.
“Ash, you were my girl for years. But before that we were friends. The best of friends. I should have never let one snag in the road cause me to turn on you like I did. It was wrong. You took all the blame for something that wasn’t entirely your fault. It was Beau’s and it was mine.”
“Yours? How—”
“I knew Beau loved you. I’d seen the way he looked at you. I also knew you loved him, more than you did me. You two had a secret bond I didn’t get to share. I was jealous. Beau was my cousin and you were the prettiest girl I’d ever seen. I wanted you for myself. So, I asked you out. Without going to Beau first, never once asking him how he felt about it. You accepted and just like magic I broke up the bond you two shared. You guys never talked anymore. There were no more late night roof talks and no more bailing y’all out of trouble. Beau was my friend and you were my girlfriend. It was as if your friendship had never been. I was selfish and ignored the guilt until it went away. Only the times I saw him watching you, with that pained, needy expression, did the guilt stir in my gut. It was mixed with fear. Fear you’d see what I’d done, and go to him. Fear I’d lose you.”
I reached down and ran my hand over his hair. “I loved you too. I wanted to be good enough for you. I wanted to be the good girl you deserved.”
“Ash, you were perfect just the way you were. I was the one who let you change. I liked the change. It’s one of the many reasons I feared I’d lose you. Deep down I knew one day that free spirit you’d quenched would fight to be released. It happened. And the fact it happened with Beau doesn’t surprise me in the least.”
“I’m sorry, Sawyer. I never meant to hurt you. I made a mess of things. You aren’t going to have to watch Beau and me together. I’m stepping out of both your lives. You can get back what was lost.”
Sawyer reached up and grabbed my hand. “Don’t do that, Ash. He needs you.”
“No, it’s what he wants too. Today he hardly acknowledged me. He only spoke to me when he was making a point to everyone else that I was to be left alone.”
Sawyer let out a sad laugh. “He won’t last long. He’s never been able to ignore you. Not even when he knew I was watching him. Right now he’s dealing with a lot. And he’s dealing with it alone. Don’t push him away.”
I jumped down from the branch and hugged Sawyer. “Thank you. Your acceptance means the world to me. But right now he needs you. You’re his brother. I’ll just be a hindrance to you two dealing with everything.”
Sawyer reached out and twirled a strand of my hair around his finger. “Even if I was wrong to take you without a thought to Beau’s feelings, I can’t make myself regret it. I’ve had three amazing years with you, Ash.”
I didn’t know what to say. I’d had good times too but I did regret choosing the wrong Vincent boy. He gave me one last sad smile then dropped my hair and walked away.
Beau
Sawyer wasn’t walking back to the four wheeler he’d driven out here. He was headed straight for me. I should’ve known he’d felt me watching them. I didn’t step out of the shadows. Instead I waited on him to join me in the darkness. Away from Ashton’s view. My body was strung tight as a cord. When she’d hugged him I wasn’t sure I’d be able to keep from jerking him off her and hurling him into the damn lake if he so much as got close to her mouth.
“Did you see and hear enough?” Sawyer asked, coming up beside me to turn around and look back at Ashton. She was no longer watching Sawyer’s retreat. Instead she turned back to the water. The breeze played with her long blonde hair, making my hands itch to go run my fingers through it.
“Yes,” I replied, hating he was as mesmerized by her as I was.
“She’s all yours now, bro. We’ve found our closure.”
I hadn’t needed his blessing but I knew Ashton had.
“From the moment I held her she became mine. I’m sorry I did this to you but you never really loved the real Ashton. I do.”
Sawyer nodded his head. “I know.”
“I’ll do whatever I have to in order to be worthy of her. She’s everything I’ve ever wanted.”
“Don’t change for her. She made that mistake with me. She fell in love with you just the way you are. Just be you, Beau. Just be you.”
She loved me. Hearing those words sent a shiver of pleasure over me. I’d finally won my girl. “She had Mr. Perfect and she wanted me instead. Doesn’t make any sense,” I said, grinning over at Sawyer.
“There’s no accounting for taste,” he chuckled and elbowed me in the ribs. “Go get her, man. She’s convinced she has to step out of our lives so we can fix our relationship. Her heart’s breaking. I could see it in her eyes. She is ready to sacrifice her happiness in order to do what she thinks is best for you. Go put the girl out of her misery.”
Step out of my life. Like hell.
I slapped Sawyer on the back and headed out to set her straight. But first I was going to feast on those full lips of hers that were all puckered up in a frown.
Ashton
Two arms wrapped around me. “God, you smell so damn good.” Beau’s voice was muffled in my neck. His warm breath sent chill bumps up my arms.
“Beau?” I croaked out.
“Mmmhmmm,” he replied, kissing my neck, and nibbling on my earlobe. I tilted my head to the side, giving him better access when I should have been trying to stop him. But with his warmth surrounding me and his hands moving up my sides I decided I didn’t care at the moment.
“What?” I managed to get out as his hands teased the lower portion of my bra strap. He was overwhelming me. I couldn’t get my thoughts together.
“I love you, Ash,” he whispered in my ear and kissed a trail from my ear to my shoulder blade.
“Uh,” I squeaked out. His thumbs brushed the underside of my breast and my knees started to buckle. It had been so long since he’d touched me.
“Easy, baby,” he murmured, pulling me back against his chest as he leaned against the tree that held our special limb. His leg settled between my thighs and I trembled.
“I’m not letting you go. You’re mine, Ash. I can’t live without you.” His voice was low and fierce as he held me tightly.
“But Sawyer . . .”
“Sawyer is okay with this. I’ve spoken to him. He and I are working things out. But Ash, I can’t continue to want you from a distance. To love you and not have you. I’d end up in jail if anyone tried to touch you, and God forbid you tried to date someone.”
I turned around in his arms and laid my hands against his hard chest. I loved his chest. Especially when it was bare.
“I only want you,” I told him, staring up into his eyes. Those long black lashes shouldn’t be so ridiculously sexy but they were. Beau buried both his hands in my hair and sighed.
“Good, because I want you too. Now. Forever. Just you.”
The thought of forever with Beau sent tingles of joy through my body and shot straight to my heart. The dread and fear I’d felt when Sawyer had said he wanted to marry me one day had no place here. Because Beau was who I wanted. It had always been Beau.
“Come to my truck with me,” Beau said in a husky whisper against my ear.
Nodding, I let him take my hand and direct me back through the woods to his truck he’d left hidden. Had Sawyer seen him?
“Sawyer was out here,” I told him as his hand slid up my side underneath my shirt.
“Yeah, I know. We talked. He’s gone. It’s just you, me and my truck,” he replied with a wicked smirk on his face.
Opening the passenger door he picked me up and sat me on the bench seat. His hands covered my knees and pulled my legs apart before he stepped up between them and laid me back against the seat. He hovered over me, never breaking eye contact. I was mesmerized. The hungry gleam in his eyes made me tremble with excitement. This was what I wanted. I wanted to be Beau’s. I wanted to touch him and taste him without guilt.
“Ash, baby, I need you tonight,” he whispered as he lowered his body over mine until his erection pressed against me. I loved hearing the desperation and desire in his voice.
“Okay,” I replied breathlessly, lifting my hips to press harder against him.
“I don’t have a condom,” he said tightly as we rubbed against each other.
“Kiss me,” I replied. I wasn’t worried about a condom just yet. I needed him.
Beau’s mouth covered mine and his tongue stroked mine in one swift plunge. Arching against him, the low, pleased groan that vibrated his chest made me a little crazy. More. I wanted more. Beau pulled my bottom lip into his mouth and sucked gently before taking a small nip then slipping his tongue back into my mouth and teasing and tasting me. Frantically I continued to move against him and reached for the hem of his shirt, yanking it up his body and forcing him to lean back so I could pull it over his head.
He chuckled as he gazed down at me. “You trying to get me naked?”
“Yes, please,” I replied sweetly and he reached for my shirt, pulling it off just as swiftly. He undid the clasp on the front of my bra, baring my chest to his view.
“So unbelievably perfect,” he whispered, running his hands over my erect nipples.
“Please, Beau.”
Beau lowered his head, keeping his eyes on me as he stuck his tongue out and flicked my nipple several times, causing me to squeal and squirm under his attention.
“Mmmm, sweet,” he said approvingly before pulling one into his mouth and sucking on it intently.
When he began unsnapping my shorts and lowering the zipper I lifted my hips so he could pull them off. He took off my panties with the shorts and threw them up in the dashboard. His mouth left my right nipple and began kissing down my stomach until he reached to just below my belly button. His hands caressed the inside of my thighs before pushing them back and opening my legs to him. Shivering, I watched helplessly as he continued his downward path. I knew where he was going but I couldn’t do anything to stop it. I was frozen with desire and need. At the first swipe of his tongue my world exploded, but he didn’t stop. Each lick sent me shivering into a bliss like I’d never known. Digging my fingernails into his shoulders I held on and screamed his name over and over as he made everything else fade away. All that mattered was Beau and how he was making me feel.