“That was cruel even given the circumstances,” he bit out.
She raised her gaze to his and did nothing to shield her emotions from him. It wasn’t like he couldn’t see inside her. He’d always been able to see to the very heart of her.
“Cruel? If you loved me, Max, you would have at least sent a goddamn message. Five seconds. You can’t tell me you couldn’t tear yourself away from your sister and your mother’s affairs for five seconds! I would have understood. I would have waited, no matter how long it took.”
“I didn’t want you to wait. I needed time to think!”
“Ah, now we get to the truth,” she said scornfully. “You had cold feet. You jumped. I jumped. And it was too fast and you got scared.”
His eyes blazed and anger rolled from him in waves. “You don’t have the market cornered on hurt, Callie. Yes, goddamn it. We moved way too fast. We burned each other up. I’ve never had a relationship that was as volatile and as passionate as ours. I worried I pushed you too hard, too far, too fast. You’re young. I’m older than you. I needed time to sort a hell of a lot out, including us.”
“Then you should have had the decency to at least tell me that over the phone,” she said softly. “Because from where I stand, you took the coward’s way out.”
“Look at me and tell me you were certain about us. Tell me you had no doubts and that you were prepared to submit to me for the long-term.”
She met his gaze and calm descended. She no longer shook. In a clear, steady voice, she said, “I had no doubts. I would have come back with you. I would have stayed. I would have done anything you wanted.”
His eyes clouded and his hands curled and uncurled. He dragged a hand through his dark hair and she noted that his fingers shook. His reaction surprised her. He was always so cool and in control. He was a deeply passionate man, but not much shook him except the two of them when they came together. They were explosive, and yes, as he’d said, volatile.
“I made a mistake, Callie. But I’ll be goddamned if both of us suffer the rest of our lives for it. I don’t give a damn that you think you’re over me or that you’re moving on. I’m not over you and I’m damn sure not moving on.”
He stared straight into her eyes, his face lined with ruthless determination. “Get used to seeing me, Callie. Because I’m not going anywhere until matters are settled between us. To my satisfaction. And to my satisfaction means you back in my bed where you damn well belong.”
Chapter Six
“You honest to God think I’m going to fall back into bed with you just because you arrive with some legitimate excuse for breaking my heart? Yeah, it sounds ridiculous and cheesy. But the truth is you destroyed something inside me, Max. I’m not sure you’re the one to fix it.”He pressed in close and grasped her shoulders in his strong hands. “I’m the only damn one who can fix it, Callie. Me. No one else. You gave yourself to me. Well, I’m not letting you take yourself back. You’re mine. I won’t let you go. I can’t let you go.”
She stared helplessly at him, unsure of what she was supposed to do or say. She was still angry. She wasn’t ready to let go of that anger, because the alternative was more grief.
“You trusted me once,” he said in frustration. “You’ll trust me again. As long as it takes, you’ll trust me.”
Her eyes narrowed and she turned her head to the side. “What are you saying? Are you moving to Clyde? Taking up residence here? Because this is my home. This is my sanctuary, my refuge. I don’t want you here.”
He pulled her in close until her body was flush against his and his heat seeped into her until he surrounded her like a blanket.
“I was your refuge. I was your sanctuary. I will be again. I’m staying here as long as it takes. I’m not shy. I have no problem going after something I want. Just be prepared to see me. A lot.”
“You sound like a damn stalker,” she said in disgust.
His nostrils flared in distaste. “Stalking, Callie? Really? Is that what you’ve lowered me to now? I’m here because I’m not letting you go. If that makes me a stalker then I’ll have to deal. I’m just warning you. Plan to see a lot of me from now on.”
With that, he grasped her nape and held her as his mouth closed over hers. It wasn’t a gentle kiss a man might give his lover in apology. No, Max had already done what little groveling he planned to do. It wasn’t in his nature to pull back. Never during sex. Never with kissing or touching. He was demanding and strong. Always pushing, testing those limits and pulling back at just the right time.
His taste burst into her mouth. She’d missed this. God, she missed him. His tongue stroked knowingly over hers, warm and slightly rough as he explored her tender mouth.
Her body came alive, responding instantly to his touch. Recognition of a lost mate.
He was a wall, hard, protecting, and her soft curves melted against him as he pulled her more firmly into his arms. No escape. He forced her to acknowledge him and the all-consuming passion between them.
Raw. Carnal. They’d always been a combustible force. It was one she didn’t understand. The attraction between them bewildered her in its intensity. She’d been with other men. She’d kissed them. Flirted. Felt the easy flare of attraction. But with Max, she found herself powerless to deny the fire that burned between them.
Even worse than the tide of arousal unfurling deep within her was the fierce ache that bloomed in her heart and spread with frightening intensity. Grief. Regret. So much regret.
She slid her hands between them, intent on pushing him away, but the moment she felt the ripple of muscles across her fingers, her touch became seeking.
He fed delicately at her mouth. Demanding and yet tender. His tongue swept over her lips, as though he were determined to taste every part of her.
His grip tightened at her nape and he angled in sharper, holding her as he ran his other hand up her side to cup her breast. His thumb brushed across one sensitive peak through the thin material of her T-shirt and she went still.
She pushed hard and stumbled away, her knees shaking so badly it was a wonder she didn’t go down. She wiped at her mouth with the back of her hand as if such a gesture could possibly erase his imprint.
Months of separation hadn’t begun to erase his mark on her. One ineffectual wipe of her hand certainly wouldn’t do it now.
“Look at me and tell me we’re done,” he bit out. “Look me in the eye, Callie. Tell me you want me gone. That you never want to see me again.”
Tears flooded her eyes and she stood, so starkly vulnerable, so wasted before him.
He swore softly and moved toward her again. This time he carefully took her into his arms and simply hugged her to his tall frame. He pressed her head to his chest and held her there as he rubbed his hand up and down her back.
“I asked you to look at me,” he whispered. “But never like that, Callie, love. Never like that, with so much hurt in your eyes that it makes my teeth ache. I put it there, I know, but give me a chance to take it away. It’s all I’m asking. Give us a chance.”
She closed her eyes and melted into him. He backed toward the bed and sat, taking her with him, enfolding her in his embrace until she was curled onto his lap, her head tucked underneath his chin.
“I never meant to hurt you like this,” he said in a tone loaded with self-derision. “I handled it badly. I handled us badly. And you’re right. I did run. But I couldn’t go far. You kept pulling me back. Always back to you.”
She pulled her head away so she could look into his eyes. All she saw was a burning intensity. No deception. He didn’t look away. “What do you want, Max?” she asked softly.
“Haven’t you been listening? I want you.”
She looked briefly away but then his fingers nudged at her chin and forced her to look back at him.
“For how long this time? What about when it’s time for you to leave? Or the next emergency happens? Or you decide you’re not cut out for a relationship? This is my home, Max. I’m not fucking around with you or indulging in some hot fling where my family lives. They’re important to me. They’re everything to me.”
He sighed and brushed a strand of hair from her forehead. “I know I have a lot of ground to regain. Your trust has been damaged. I get that. But give me a chance, Callie. You and me. Let’s do it right this time.”
“Define right.”
“I take you out to dinner. You take me to meet your family. We go out on dates. You show me your town. Show me the places you love. Show me what makes you you.”
She sucked in a deep breath. Her heart was fluttering so madly that she had a hard time getting air in and out of her lungs.
“Okay,” she said quietly.
“No, not okay, like you’ve just received a death sentence. Do it because you want me like I want you. Show me that woman I fell head over ass for. The woman who doesn’t take shit off anyone. Who has so much fire she burns me with every touch. That’s the woman I want back.”
Her lips slid slowly upward into a smile.
“I missed you, Max.”
He crushed her to him, and it was then she could feel that his heart was every bit as out of control as hers. It thudded against her skin like the wings of a hummingbird.
“I missed you too. So damn much. There was a hole in my chest that was eating me alive.”
Hope fluttered up, tentative but there. It was tempting to squash it back down. She’d already been hurt so much. But more than the hurt, something came alive inside her, bubbled up until it overwhelmed her. Joy. It had been so long since she’d felt remotely happy that the sensation was alien.
“Tell me yes, Callie. Tell me you’re in this thing with me.”
She reached for him this time, the first time she’d made an overt gesture to touch him. She brushed her hands over his cheeks, felt the rasp of stubble on his jaw. Then she leaned in and kissed him softly.
“Yes.”
He groaned but allowed her free rein. She could feel the tension flowing from his coiled muscles. How he remained so still when his very nature demanded that he dominate amazed her.
She pulled away, her fingers slowly falling from his face. He caught her hands and pulled them between them to rest against his stomach.
“There’s just one other thing we need to come to an understanding about.”
She eyed him warily as his gaze roved possessively over her.
“We’re together. In every sense of the word. Which means you in my bed. Every night. No matter what. I’m willing to do whatever it takes to build us again but that includes us in the bedroom as well.”
She inhaled sharply, her body automatically responding to the dominance in his voice.
“The words. I want the words.”
She licked her lips nervously and then slowly nodded. “All right.”
Chapter Seven
Callie stumbled from Max’s hotel room, her mind and senses reeling. He hadn’t wanted her to go. He’d wanted her to stay with him. But she needed time to process what had just happened. And her parents were expecting her. Lunch tomorrow. She’d told them she’d be back tonight.She hadn’t invited Max. Maybe that hurt him. But she simply wasn’t ready to introduce him to her family. She first had to come to terms with and resolve herself to the abrupt change that was her relationship with Max.
How could she go from deeply wounded to suddenly happy? Her family would smell a rat a mile away. Then they’d want an explanation, and she wasn’t ready to spill what had transpired between her and Max.
They would be angry. Understandably so, and their relationship with Max would forever be tarnished by the fact he’d hurt her so badly. They wouldn’t forgive so easily.
She got into her SUV and drove. No direction. No clear destination. She circled the small town and pulled up to the bar. Dillon would be working tonight since he’d ordered her to take the night off. Which meant that Lily was home with only Michael and Seth.
She’d promised her mom she’d be back, but she couldn’t go yet. Not without talking to Lily. Her mind was about to explode and she needed to unload. Lily was the only person who knew the whole story.
She backed out of the parking lot and turned in the direction of Dillon’s cabin. It wasn’t a far drive from town, but it was down a winding private road that dead-ended at his house.
Her hands shook on the steering wheel, and she took her time, not trusting herself not to wind up in a ditch. When she finally pulled up to the cabin, she breathed a sigh of relief and shut off the engine.
Before she was fully out of her truck, Seth appeared on the front porch and leaned against one of the posts, his gaze sharp as he watched her get out.
She smiled or at least she thought she did. Her entire face felt frozen and her lips were still swollen from Max’s kisses.
“I thought you were staying with Mom and the dads tonight.”