Rush (Breathless #1) - Page 8/50

“I wonder what you’re imagining I’ll do to you,” he murmured.

“There were words like bondage and pain,” she pointed out. “It’s a reasonable fear.”

“Yes, it is,” he conceded. “But there is no mention of a safe word because for me, it’s as simple as you saying no.”

Her brow furrowed. “The contract was pretty clear that I don’t have that ability. That if I sign, I give up any right to tell you no.”

He sighed. “I’m not some monster bent on abusing you, Mia. You’re right in that I don’t like the word no very much. But my hope is that you won’t be using it often. I’d rather reserve that word for rare occasions when you are truly frightened or uncomfortable. I don’t want it popping out of your mouth just because you’re uncertain and the idea strikes you wrong before you even give it a chance. But if you truly find yourself in a situation that you do not want to be in, no is sufficient for me to stop. I may not like it, but I won’t ignore that word. Ever. You have my word on that. We’ll discuss what made you uncomfortable and we’ll either address it and soothe your fears, or we’ll move on and leave it behind.”

“So just don’t cry wolf,” she said.

“Exactly.”

She was starting to lighten, some of the worry evaporating. There was a tinge of excitement that tugged at her as she contemplated being so close to something she’d desired ever since she’d been a teenager on the cusp of womanhood.

“Is there anything more?” he asked, staring expectantly at her.

She nodded and then drew in a deep breath. He may or may not take her next condition well. But it was something she refused to budge on.

“There’s an entire paragraph devoted to the issue of my fidelity. However, there’s nothing about you being faithful to me.”

Amusement glimmered in his eyes. “That’s important to you.”

“Hell yes,” she said with more force than she intended. “If that contract says I’m yours, then by God it’s going to say you belong to me.”

He threw back his head and laughed. “All right. I have no issue with adding that clause. Now, are we done?”

Slowly she shook her head. “There’s one other thing. And it’s pretty huge. The most important part of any agreement we strike.”

He leaned back a bit, his brows coming together as he studied her. “It sounds like a potential deal breaker for you.”

She nodded. “It is.”

“I’m listening.”

“If we do this thing…Jace can never know. The truth, I mean.”

She hastened to add on because she didn’t like the look on Gabe’s face, “It’s not what you think. I’m not ashamed of you or anything. But if Jace knew everything, he’d never accept it. You have to have given this thought, Gabe. You can’t have made this kind of proposal without thinking of what it could do not only to your friendship but your business relationship. Jace would never understand. To him I’m still his baby sister, someone he’s hugely overprotective of. Hell, he still runs a background check on anyone I date.”

“I would hope so,” Gabe growled.

“Can you imagine his reaction if he were to find out about us in the kind of relationship you’re proposing?”

“I had no intention of him knowing the private details of our affair,” Gabe said in a calm voice. “All he needs to know is that you’re working for me. I am discreet if nothing else. I have no desire for my private life to be blasted all over the media as it was when Lisa and I divorced. People can speculate all they want, but I refuse to give them irrefutable knowledge.”

“Jace won’t take speculation well,” she murmured. “And I don’t want to lie to him.”

“You’ll only lie by omission. And if we’re discreet, the only speculation will be whether we’re having an affair. Jace understands gossip. He’ll know you’re working for me, and that will fuel rumors. As long as we don’t give him reason to suspect differently, he’ll only be angry that rumors circulate at all and he’ll be very quick to put out those fires.”

“I understand. It’s just that if I’m supposed to spend all my time with you, that won’t work. I have my own apartment. I have friends…”

She trailed off, realizing she was already on the defensive before they’d even embarked on their affair. She hated that word. She wished Gabe hadn’t used it. It sounded so…sordid. Like he was married and she was his mistress on the side. As if she were his dirty secret, and she supposed in a twisted way that it was just the opposite. He was her dirty little secret.

“You have a choice to make, Mia,” he said, a harder edge to his voice. “I’m not forcing you to agree to this. But if you do, I expect compliance. We’ll work around the obstacles. I’m not saying you won’t have time for your other interests. Just that my interests will come first.”

His arrogance should so get her back up. It should annoy the hell out of her, but she found it so sexy and so irresistible that it sent butterflies winging through her belly.

“You don’t expect me to move in…?”

“No. I understand you must maintain the appearance of having your own apartment if Jace isn’t to know that we’re lovers. But you will spend a lot of time with me at the place of my choosing. Caroline can cover you with Jace, surely.”

Her eyes narrowed. “How do you know about Caroline?”

He smiled then, his eyes gleaming with that predatory light. “There isn’t much I don’t know about you, Mia.”

She bit the inside of her cheek in consternation. She hadn’t ever imagined that Gabe had paid her much attention at all. Yes, he gave her gifts for special occasions. He’d attended both her graduations. But she hadn’t imagined that he knew any of the personal details of her life. Why would he bother? She was just the little sister of his best friend. A passing acquaintance and someone he saw in conjunction with Jace.

She was beginning to realize that Gabe had had a much keener interest in her, dating back longer than she could have imagined. She didn’t know whether to be alarmed or triumphant over that fact.

“So what is your answer?” he prompted. “Do we have an agreement? Have I allayed your fears or do you have other concerns to bring up?”

She could sense the impatience in his voice. He looked just as he did when wrapping up an important business deal. Hard. Unyielding. And uncompromising. Only he had compromised. He’d made concessions she hadn’t truly thought he’d make, and that comforted her. It made her feel like the balance of power wasn’t quite so out of her favor.

There was no doubt there would be a distinct inequality and that the power swung more heavily to his side, but she wasn’t without choices. The fact that he’d shown he wasn’t completely inflexible gave her the confidence to forge ahead.

“We have an agreement,” she said in a quiet tone.

She reached into her bag and pulled out the contract that already bore her signature. She handed it to him, hating the awkwardness wrought by the fact that her sex life had become a business negotiation.

“I wasn’t sure what to do about the changes. I mean, the things I wanted changed and also the part about Jace. I thought it was better to make sure everything was in writing so I struck through the clauses and reworded and initialed.”

He looked a little taken aback and then he laughed, a deep, throaty sound that vibrated over her, sending pleasure up her spine.

“So were you prepared to walk if you didn’t like my answers?” he asked.

She glanced up, caught his gaze and held it, and then she nodded.

He smiled as he took the contract. “Good. In business, the biggest power you have is the willingness to walk away from a deal. You’re not the mouse Jace thinks you are. I think you’re going to do very well as my assistant.”

He rose and then extended his hand down to help her to her feet. She slid her hand into his, savoring the warmth and strength of his hold. Just having his hands on her now that the dynamic of their relationship had changed filled her with anticipation. No longer would his touches be casual. Each would have deeper meaning. She was his. His possession. She belonged to him.

“Come to my desk and I’ll initial your changes and sign it. I’ll have my lawyer finalize it and send you a copy.”

Her nose wrinkled and he halted halfway to his desk. He simply lifted an eyebrow in question, and she sighed.

“It just sounds so…I don’t even have the word. I know I’m being silly. I’ve never entered a relationship where a lawyer was involved beforehand. It sounds so…cold.”

Gabe touched her cheek, just a simple gesture of reassurance. “I do this to protect myself as well as you. But Mia? I can guarantee you one thing. Our relationship will never be cold. It will be a lot of things, but cold isn’t one of them.”

His hand fell away, leaving her to contemplate the heat in his stare and the sensuality of his touch. And the quiet vow in his voice. No, she didn’t imagine their relationship would be at all cold. Hot. Torrid. Breathless. Consuming. All of those words she could well imagine. But definitely not cold.

He went to his desk and hastily scribbled his initials, and then affixed his signature beside hers on the last page. Then he turned, pushing the contract farther across his desk.

“There’s a lot that needs to be done. I’ll set up an appointment for you with my personal physician to have the necessary physical done as well as set up your method of birth control if you aren’t already on it. You’ll be supplied a copy of my last medical checkup as well as a copy of all my blood tests. But first you’ll need to visit my human resources director to set the terms of your employment, and of course your benefits and salary.”

“Okay,” she croaked out, suddenly overwhelmed by just how fast her life was changing. Was she prepared for this?

“It’s going to be all right, Mia,” he said in a low voice. “Trust me to take care of you.”

Peace settled over her. Exhilaration took hold. Like riding a roller coaster and topping that peak only to plunge over, wind in your face, heart beating a mile a minute.

“I do trust you, Gabe. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.”

And maybe that hadn’t been entirely true before now. She’d be lying if she hadn’t had some small fear that she was biting off way more than she could chew. But being here, hearing what he had to say and feeling the intensity and the sincerity of his words…She did trust him, and she had to, because she’d be the biggest fool on earth for ever agreeing to this kind of arrangement unless she implicitly trusted the man she’d just signed her life over to.

She just hoped she didn’t live to regret her decision.

Chapter seven

The rest of the day was a complete blur for Mia. She spent an hour in human resources filling out paperwork and going over benefits and salary. The amount of money offered as Gabe’s personal assistant made her eyes go wide. She hadn’t imagined he’d pay her much of anything considering they both knew it was a cover for their relationship. She wasn’t even sure how much actual work would be accomplished, but maybe he’d surprise her.

But it gave her peace of mind that she wasn’t completely dependent on him—or Jace—to provide anything for her. She already had in mind that she needed to save as much as possible for the day when Gabe no longer wanted her. She wasn’t fanciful—or stupid—enough to believe that their relationship would be any more long-term than his others.

While she didn’t know the exact details of his prior relationships, she’d heard Jace and Ash talk enough to know that one year was Gabe’s max when it came to women, and more often than not, six months was normal.

The one thing she was glad of was that Gabe had made her see that she needed to do more than work at La Patisserie. Her education was going to waste because she was too softhearted to quit working for Greg and Louisa. And maybe there was a part of her that was afraid to brave the business world.

What better way to become initiated than to work for Gabe? If nothing else, it would give her experience and look good on her resume. It would ease the way to her finding another job after he broke things off with her. Whatever job that would be…

She reminded herself often that her relationship with Gabe wouldn’t be long-term. She did so in order to numb herself to the inevitable. So she could accept it when the time came.

She wasn’t a teenager anymore, even if Gabe inspired very teenage-like reactions. It was time to grow the hell up and be an adult in an adult relationship.

After her stint in human resources, she was whisked into a car and taken to a clinic several blocks away, where she was given rush VIP treatment. No waiting. No paperwork for that matter, which she found odd. She peed in a cup, had blood drawn and then answered a host of questions from the doctor, including her preferred method of birth control and whether she needed him to take care of the matter.