The next thing Lily knew, she was sitting up in bed, her throat hoarse from screaming, and Ryder was rushing into the dark room dressed in his jeans, the door shutting behind him. He quickly flicked the light on low and climbed onto the bed, his back braced against the headboard. Then he pulled her shaking body onto his lap, and held her against his chest. “Jesus, Lil. What were you dreaming about, baby? You must have had a nightmare.”
“Nothing,” she gasped. “It’s nothing.”
His arms tightened. “Was it about that night on the boat?”
She squeezed her eyes shut. “I don’t want to talk about—”
“Too bad,” he grunted, cutting her off. “It’s time you tell me. I need to know how you got away that night.”
She wanted to argue, to refuse, but she was cuddled naked in his arms, her head resting back on his right biceps, the look in his dark eyes when she lifted her lashes making it clear that this was important to him. He lifted his free hand, pushing her hair back from her face, and the tender touch was her undoing. Forcing the words from her tight throat, she said, “I don’t remember a lot from when Rado was talking to my father. That monster and his men were hurting him, torturing him, and I was screaming, fighting, trying to reach him as they held me back. Then Rado sent me off with one of his men until he was ready to deal with me, telling the guy to clean me up so I would be ready for him and the others. So the man . . . he took me down to my stateroom.” Her face burned as she gave a hard swallow. “And then I played him.”
His brows were drawn together in a V, a muscle pulsing in his scarred cheek. “What do you mean?”
She wet her lips, trying to keep her voice steady as she lowered her gaze to his chin, not wanting to see the look in his beautiful eyes when she explained. “I came on to him, acting like I . . . I wanted him over the others. Told him that I’d run away with him if he helped me. That I had a lot of money and would make it worth his while. That I’d be willing to do whatever he wanted, as long as it was just him. So he, um, took the bait and started to kiss me. I hated it, wanting to throw up. But I kissed him back until I knew he was focused on me and not worrying about what I might do.”
She could feel the tension creeping into his muscles. “Did he rape you?” he asked in a low, deadly voice.
“He would have. But when he broke the kiss to pull off his shirt, I grabbed his balls and twisted so hard they probably don’t work right anymore.”
She took a quick peek at his face and caught the twitch at the corner of his mouth. “Good girl,” he murmured, rubbing the pad of his thumb beneath her eye. She hadn’t even realized that she was quietly crying until he lifted his thumb to his mouth, tasting her tears. Her breath caught as she struggled to remember what she’d been saying.
“What’d you do after that, Lil?”
“Um, I grabbed what I could, stuck it into the waterproof kayaking pack I still use, and snuck out of my room. I made my way to the deck and slipped over the railing, into the water. When I started swimming away, I heard something that made me look back. They were dumping my dad’s and Nancy’s bodies over the side of the boat.”
“Jesus,” he hissed, pressing his lips to her forehead. “I’m sorry, baby. I’m so damn sorry. I know I should have told you that before, but things have been . . . Shit, I’m just an ass. And I’m sorry.” He pulled his head back so that he could catch her gaze again, his expression confused. “But why didn’t you want to tell me?”
“I didn’t want you to think . . . I don’t know. I felt stupid. You would have kicked his ass, while I had to use a ridiculous deception to get free. I guess I just didn’t want you to think I was pathetic. I mean, you weren’t exactly friendly when I got here.”
“You’re not pathetic,” he said fervently. “You’re amazing. You saved your ass when most people would have been catatonic with fear. That took balls and guts and more courage than I can even imagine. I’m proud as hell of you.”
The tightness in her chest eased, and she blinked up at him. “Yeah?”
“You bet your sweet little ass, yeah.”
“But there was a moment, I don’t know how long it lasted, where I started to think my plan wouldn’t work. I’ve never been so scared in my life, Scott. And I felt so horrible, for being afraid of what might happen to me, when my dad and Nancy had already suffered so much.”
“No, baby,” he rasped, pulling her against his chest. “That’s called survival instinct and there’s no stopping it. I know for a fact that your dad would have been so damn proud of you.”
She tucked her head under his chin and wrapped her arms around his lean torso, hugging him. She thought she probably could have stayed like that for the rest of the night and enjoyed the best sleep of her life, until she remembered that she’d been alone when she’d awakened from her nightmare. “You’d gone back to your room, hadn’t you?”
His body stiffened against hers. “Yeah.”
Forcing herself to pull out of his arms, she climbed off his lap. “I’m fine, Scott. You can head back to your own bed now. I’m sorry for bothering you.”
“Lily, I just—”
“Really, it’s okay,” she said, cutting him off. “I just need to get some sleep. I’ll see you in the morning, okay?”
“Shit,” he muttered under his breath, moving to his feet. But he didn’t leave her. Instead, he took off his jeans and turned off the light.
“What are you doing?” she asked, when he climbed back onto the bed, pulled the covers over them, and yanked her against his chest, tangling his legs with hers.
“Just shut up and let me hold you,” he said into her hair, tucking her head beneath his chin again. “I haven’t been able to sleep worth a damn tonight anyway.”
She was still hurt that he’d left her, but didn’t argue or resist, simply wanting as much time with him as she could get. Lying quietly in his arms, she thought he’d already fallen asleep when his deep voice rumbled above her head in the darkness. “Did you know that you’re the only person I know who calls me Scott?”
“Not in my thoughts.”
“Huh?”
“I think of you as Ryder,” she explained. “But I purposefully started using your first name when talking to you a long time ago so that you might notice me. I wanted to be different from all the other girls you knew.”
Running his big hand down her back, he said, “You didn’t need to do that to get me to notice you, Lil. You were firmly stuck in my head from the first moment I ever saw you, even though you were too damn young for a guy my age.”
“Well, I’m a big girl now. So you don’t have to feel like a pervert anymore,” she teased, cuddling a little closer to his mouthwatering bod as she hitched her leg over his hip.
She could hear the smile in his voice as he said, “Considering some of the things I’d like to do to you, I think the pervert thing is probably still valid.” His tone was wry.
“Oh yeah? What kind of things?”
“Things that would be too much for your sore little pussy right now,” he rumbled, sliding his hand between her legs and cupping her puffy folds. He slipped his fingertips around her vulva, which was already hot and slick. “God, I love how wet you get for me. But damn, you’re really swollen, Lil. I went at you pretty hard tonight.”
She moaned low in her throat. “I’m okay.”
“Well, let’s make it better than okay.”
Even though she knew how incredible his mouth was, she was actually sore enough that she didn’t think she would be able to fully appreciate his efforts when he pushed her to her back and started kissing his way down the front of her body. But she’d underestimated him and her need for him. Her craving for the way he could make her feel. Her body melted into a pool of hot liquid as he held her open with his thumbs and took his time, licking her slowly, thoroughly, hungrily. The hard, husky sounds he made in the back of his throat, along with the feel of his hands as he gripped the insides of her thighs, keeping her pressed open, made it clear that he was really enjoying himself. Even when she started to come, he kept at her, licking and sucking on the tender opening of her body, eating her out in every sense of the word until she was boneless and replete, too steeped in satisfaction to even open her eyes.
“What now?” she asked when he placed a lingering kiss to her still softly pulsing clit, then moved back up beside her.
“What do you mean?” There was a definite edge in his voice, as if he was worried about where she was going with the question.
She trailed her fingertips down the hard ridges on his sexy-as-sin stomach. “Don’t I get a turn?”
“You can have your turn later,” he said, clearly relieved she’d been talking about giving him head, and not what was happening between them. He grabbed her hand and flattened it against his chest, over the heavy beat of his heart. Then he pulled her close and pressed a gentle kiss to the top of her head. “Right now, just get some sleep. I’ll be here until I have to go and take over the watch for Mike. I won’t leave you again. I promise.”
With those beautiful words drifting through her head, Lily closed her eyes and drifted away.
SEVEN
THE NEXT DAY PROVED TO BE HELL FOR RYDER. SHEER FUCKING hell. He’d wanted to wake Lily up slow and easy, with his dick already buried deep inside her, where he knew she would be soft and wet . . . soaking him, hugging him. Had wanted to squeeze himself in, forcing that mouthwatering cunt to give way for him, and then ride her with gentle nudges, like a lapping sea, until she’d finally opened her eyes and stared up at him. There would have been a small, sexy smile on her pink lips. And it would have been his signal to fuck her harder, until they were pounding away like a storm. Hot and raw, with sweat flying and her short nails digging into his back, urging him on. It was a hell of a fantasy. But he hadn’t been able to play it out, since he’d had to leave her to take over for Mike in the early hours of the morning.
Like a bad sitcom, his luck hadn’t improved as the day progressed. Once everyone was up and moving around, he’d kept trying to snag a moment alone with her but shit just kept getting in his way. First there were the calls from Ben, giving him frustrating updates on the search for Radovich that was so far going nowhere. When he’d finally gotten off the phone with the sheriff and tracked Lily down in the living room, where she was reading, Mike had walked into the room announcing that lunch was ready. Getting desperate, Ryder had cornered her in the kitchen when they’d finished eating and managed to steal a hungry, mouthwatering kiss from her. She’d tasted delicious, and the innocent blush on her cheeks when he’d finally pulled away to suck in some much-needed oxygen had only cranked up his need to fuck her. But before they’d even made it out of the kitchen, there was another interruption when Reese showed up at the front door with her friend Brit. The women had come over to keep Lily company for the afternoon, and while Ryder appreciated the friendly gesture, he’d still wanted to wring their damn necks for getting in his way.
Listening to the women chattering away in the living room, he’d hunkered down with Mike in the control room and focused his mind on the Radovich problem. He knew Mike had to be aware of what had happened between him and Lily during the night, considering how loudly she’d been screaming. But Mike had been smart enough not to say anything about it, which was a relief. She might be gutsy as hell in some ways, but Ryder wasn’t sure how much teasing she could take about the two of them fucking each other’s brains out. Especially when it was just a temporary thing.
A scowl wove its way between his brows as that last thought twisted through his mind, same as it’d been doing all damn day. He hated the cramp in his gut that came every time he thought about the fact that what they had wasn’t permanent. He had no doubt that the end would . . . suck. For both of them. But it wasn’t going to keep him from getting as much of her as he could until the Rado situation was over and she could haul her little ass back to Virginia.
Where I’ll never get to see her. Or talk to her. Or hear her laugh.
Muttering a guttural curse under his breath, he pushed away from the desk in the control room, breathing a sigh of relief when he heard Reese and Brit saying their good-byes. The women had even stayed to help clean up after dinner, and Ryder had tried to work out his frustration in the fitness room, then grabbed a shower while everyone had coffee. But now they were finally leaving, Mike was taking the first watch again, and Ryder couldn’t wait to get Lily alone.
With a comfortable pair of jeans hanging low on his hips, he waited in the hallway for Lily to head to her room, anticipation making his heart pound like a bitch when she turned the corner. She gave him a shy, sweet smile the second she saw him, and his damn dick nearly burst through the denim.