He rushed to my side holding me. “Did someone hurt you, Aimes?”
He wrapped around me, squeezing the life out of me. I let him cocoon around me and make me feel a sense of safety, even if it was fleeting. Even his love couldn’t save me from what was coming.
I cried in sheets, like the cold coastal rain.
It poured out in sobs and heaves.
I had lost it.
His shirt was getting soaked where I cried and left different forms of my bodily fluids on it. I started laughing, finding it funny that I had thoroughly snotted his shirt.
He pulled me back, and his eyes were intense. “Did someone hurt you?”
I nodded. “Sort of, but I did it to myself.”
I wiped my eyes dry with my sleeves as he passed me a tissue. He took an extra one for himself and began wiping his shoulder. He looked horrified at the wet mark.
I laughed harder, unable to control myself.
He frowned at me. “I’m glad you find it so amusing that you’ve left nasal secretions on my shoulder, dear God.”
His fussing over the shirt made me laugh more. I couldn’t look at him without being sent into a fit of giggles again. I turned away from him for a moment and straightened my face and waited for the fit to pass by.
He left the couch and sat across from me on the other leather couch.
I looked at him gravely when I finally found my calm.
“Something terrible has happened and I don’t know what to do. I’m putting you in terrible danger coming here, but I don’t know where else to go.”
He shook his head. “Aimes, whatever is going on, we will find a rational and sensible solution. I’m still your best friend, even if I haven’t acted much like one.”
I shook my head. “I haven’t either, Blake, and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t care who you date. I was being petty.”
He smiled. “I should have told you the truth years ago. I thought, honestly, that you knew. I’ve been head over heels for that twit forever.”
I nodded, not smiling.
I couldn’t bring myself to smile. I dreaded what was about to happen. I knew the possibilities that he would either commit me or kick me out lingered in the air as I started to speak.
“Remember when you asked me to just listen and hear the whole story, before I slapped you and walked away?”
He nodded, looking confused.
“I need that same favor. But I need you to act like an adult, not the child I acted like. Is that possible?”
He nodded again, sitting back on the couch getting comfy.
My stomach twisted and turned as my nerves prepared the rest of me for the worst-case scenario.
I took a deep breath and started. I watched as his brain was translating and diagnosing me as I spoke.
He couldn’t understand what I was saying and couldn’t imagine any of it would ever be real. He had a scientific reason for everything I said. I ignored his looks and continued speaking until I got to the very end of the story, which landed me on his couch, crying and homeless.
Blake sat there, looking very lost at the end of the story.
I looked at him, pleading with him. “Blake, I want you to think about who is telling you this. Look at me. Have I ever given you cause to not trust something I was telling you?”
He shook his head slowly. “What are you becoming?”
I didn’t have an answer. I shrugged, still watching him take it all in.
“You ran from the bus stop at Miller’s Crossing all the way here in a day?” His voice was empty, no accusation or feeling.
I nodded, wanting him to believe me, so that I could finally rest a bit. I wasn’t tired in the regular sense, but I was tired of not feeling safe.
He took a deep breath. “Okay, I am going to go with you on this one, until I can either disprove or solve it.”
My eyes lit up. “I can stay here with you?”
He frowned at me. “Why wouldn’t you stay here with me? You thought I would kick you out because you drank alien blood from that guy and don’t require sleep or food anymore?”
I nodded as he got up from the couch and grabbed my hand.
“I need sleep and I suggest you try too.”
I let him drag me to his room. We climbed on top of his bed. He turned the lights out and lay beside me on the bed.
“How are things with Alise?” I asked, tired of my ridiculous life.
He laughed. “Oh man, your sister is crazy. I have no idea what to do with her. It’s like having a two-year-old around, and you know how I feel about other people's children in my house. She touches things and breaks them. She has to be doing something at every second of every day. I seriously think she might need Ritalin or something.”
I burst out laughing.
He turned to look at me with a serious face. “Aimee, I’m not kidding. She broke my vintage Luke Skywalker. It was still in the box, and she took it out and broke it. She said it was an accident, but I think she misbehaves on purpose to start fights with me.”
He had hit the nail on the head. I chuckled, feeling sorry for him.
“You can't choose who you love; I’m a prime example of that.”
“Do you love him, Aimes, even after he left you in the hospital, lied to you about what he did for a living, and let Jaime die?” Blake’s voice wasn’t cruel; he truly was curious.
I felt close to tears as I spoke, “When I’m with Shane, I feel so in love with him, but when I’m with Aleks, I feel in love with him too. I don’t know what to do.”
He sighed. “Aimes, love is supposed to lift you up, not bring you down. If you are obsessively in love with this guy, then you need to end it. No relationship that’s healthy puts the other person above you. The relationship that ends all of the good things in your life is the wrong relationship. You’re choosing the wrong guy if you love Aleks.”
“Look at you, Mr. Love Guru.”
He laughed. “I saw it on Dr. Phil.”
I closed my eyes. “I do love Aleks, but not as much as I love Shane. I wish I didn’t love Aleks at all. I truly think that if he’d never come along, I would have found my way to Shane naturally. I would be happy right now, instead of dying alone.”
Blake pulled me onto his chest and kissed the top of my head. “You’ll never be alone, Aimes, not ever. Besides, you can see ghosts now; you're good.”
I whacked him in the gut and snuggled into his armpit.
“How’s Giselle?” I asked, scared to hear the answer.
“She’s great, as far as I know. Her body has accepted the liver with no problems. Alise said your dad was there again today to see her. I guess he and Shane stayed in the city a few days. She’s doing amazing. Your dad doesn’t even worry about you though. He believes that lie about you being at the celebrity liver clinic. I knew it was bullshit the minute your sister told me about it.”
“Yeah, I couldn’t believe that weirdo was able to trick my dad. Of all of the people in the world I would not call gullible. He bought it though—it was strange.”
“I was scared you were dead or something and that he just couldn’t cope with it.”
I hugged him tighter. “I would have haunted you a little, so you would have known.”
He laughed. “Yeah, I expect you to haunt me when you die.”
I felt so happy for Giselle. If anyone deserved a happy ending in all of this nonsense, it was her.
I fell asleep quickly.
I woke many hours later to an empty room and daylight streaming through the huge windows.
The room was warm. I felt re-energized and invigorated. I didn’t know how to respond to waking without the feeling of wanting to go back to sleep. It had been so long since I’d been healthy and not depressed. Sleep had been my companion over the course of the last ten months.
Blake was gone, which worried me. I climbed out of his bed and walked to the family room, hoping I would find him at the computer.
He was nowhere to be found in the basement. I climbed the stairs, hoping his parents were still in the city, or at the very least, on a vacation somewhere. I didn’t think I could face his chipper and perky mom, not after everything I'd been through.
Blake’s house was completely empty. I searched every room, starting to feel panicked. I sat on the peach leather couch in the front room. I watched out the front window for him to come home with my sister, dad, Shane, or worse. I assumed he had panicked when he woke and ran from the house, thinking me either crazed or drugged out.
I sat there for a long time, not moving. I noticed my lack of need to move. I wasn’t restless or fidgeting; I wasn’t feeling the need to change positions. I barely needed to breathe. I held my breath just to see how long I could go for. I started to feel weird about not breathing, but not desperate for air. When I breathed I felt better, but it wasn’t as if I couldn’t have made it another twenty minutes without the breath. I decided to test it out and walked to the backyard. I stripped down to my underwear and tank top. I jumped into the cool crisp pool and let out all of the air in my lungs. I sank like a stone to the bottom of the deep end of the pool. I sat and waited for desperation and panic to set in. Nothing happened, so I waited some more.
I saw a dark figure at the edge of the pool and felt my stomach fill with nerves. I pushed myself up to see Blake’s frowning face.
“You were down there for seven minutes.” He didn’t flinch.
I frowned at him. “I thought you were Dorian, not cool. I could have gone longer. Were you spying on me?”
He nodded. “I wanted to see what you would do when you were alone. I watched you hold your breath on the couch. This is crazy.”
“I know.”
He sat at the edge of the pool and hiked up his pants. He dipped his feet into the pool and cringed at the cold. “My dad hasn’t turned the heat on yet. This weekend, he said. It's fifty degrees, Aimes, fifty. The chemicals were just balanced yesterday in preparation for summer.” He pulled his legs out after a couple seconds.
I shook my head. “It doesn’t feel cold to me.”