"What am I?" Kylie gripped Della's arm. "I need to know." Holy hell, she'd been waiting for the answer to this question for months. "Please, Della!"
"You..." Della shook her head. "You're human. One hundred percent human."
"Not funny." Kylie wanted to believe Della was teasing her, but the look on her roommate's face said otherwise. But how could she be human after everything that had happened to her? She remembered crying last night and telling Della she missed being human. Missed being normal. Had she willed it to happen?
Kylie darted out the door and ran as fast as she could to the office.
Not even Holiday's closed office door slowed her down. She barged in. Burnett and Holiday jumped apart as if ... they'd been kissing. Oh, my God. The image of what she'd seen for a flicker of a second played in Kylie's head.
Burnett and Holiday were kissing. Any other time, Kylie might have yelped with joy.
Not now.
"We were ... we were just...," Holiday stuttered.
Kylie didn't care. Her heart pounded. Her mind tried to make sense of the fact that she was fully human. How was that even possible? What did it mean?
Even as she asked herself the questions, she knew the answer to the last one. Being human meant leaving Shadow Falls. Holiday. Burnett. Miranda. Della. Lucas. Perry. Derek. Jonathon and Helen. All of them. It meant walking away forever from her new life.
Tears filled her eyes.
"What's wrong?" Holiday asked.
It meant never helping another lost soul. It meant going back to her old life, where she never felt as if she belonged.
Okay, she had missed her old life. She had. But right now, she knew with twenty-twenty clarity that she would miss her new life more. These last few months, as hard as they had been, she'd come closer to knowing her true self than she ever had before. Maybe she still didn't know what she was, but in so many ways, she knew more about who she was.
"Kylie? What is it?" Holiday insisted.
"What the hell does this mean?" She pointed to her forehead.
Holiday and Burnett looked at her and their eyebrows twitched. The shock she saw in both their eyes didn't help Kylie's confusion. The knot in her throat grew to the size of a large frog.
Thirty minutes later, Kylie still sat on Holiday's sofa, with her legs pulled up to her chest, her forehead against her knees. She was dry-cried out.
The camp leader sat beside her. Holiday's hand rested on Kylie's back and sent waves of calm washing over her, but it didn't chase away the fear that swelled in her chest. She'd caused this herself. Brought this on herself. She'd somehow tapped into a power she didn't know she had and turned herself back into a human. Was it irreversible?
Kylie lifted her head. "I didn't mean to do it."
"Do what?" Holiday asked.
Kylie's throat felt raw. "Della and I were talking about how we wished ... we wished we were human again. That we missed being normal, and-" Her breath caught. "And I do miss it, but right now it's so clear that I would miss this new life more. I don't want to be human, Holiday."
Empathy filled Holiday's eyes and she smiled. "I don't know what's happening. I don't understand it. But if there is one thing I'm certain about, it's that you are not human, Kylie. Well, not just human."
"But what if the death angels are trying to teach me a lesson? What if they got pissed at me for being ungrateful and this is my punishment?"
Holiday shook her head. "I've never heard of them turning someone into a human for punishment. And believe me, there isn't a supernatural alive who hasn't had moments of wishing they were human. That's perfectly normal."
"Really?"
"Of course. We live in the human world. The grass always looks greener on the other side. Truth is, sometimes it is greener. But we can't change what we are simply by wishing it was so."
Kylie nodded. "So you think this is just a fluke?"
"I don't know. But if I were guessing, I'd say it will change just like it's changed numerous other times."
"Will I not have any powers until it changes back?"
The question seemed to stump Holiday. "I ... Wait. Can you still feel me attempting to alter your emotions?" Holiday rested her hand on Kylie's shoulder.
She felt the warmth leak from Holiday's touch through her shirt and flow into her skin. Then the soft heat seemed to form a bubble that flowed into her chest cavity, where it morphed into a soothing wash of emotion.
"Yes," Kylie said.
"Then I'd say nothing else has changed."
"So humans can't sense your touch?"
"No."
Kylie inhaled and found a little inner peace. Then she looked at Holiday. "Do you think I'll ever figure out what I am?"
"Of course you will." Holiday paused. "I didn't want to mention it because it's not a sure thing, but Burnett told me that the real Brightens, in Ireland, confirmed their plane reservations back to the States for the middle of September."
Kylie's heart skipped a beat. "Do they know about me?"
"Not that we know of. Burnett did some checking on the phone number for the caller the detective spoke to the day he'd thought he'd been talking to the Brightens. It wasn't their phone. The call was made from a cell phone, a throwaway, they call them. They can't trace it."
"But Burnett knows how to reach the Brightens now? I could call them, couldn't I?"
Holiday frowned. "I don't think this is something you want to talk about over the phone, Kylie."
Holiday was right, but Kylie was just so damn tired of waiting. She reached back and rubbed the tension in her shoulder and wished Burnett were still here. He'd cut out shortly after she'd started to cry. She wasn't sure if he'd been frightened by her tears or frightened by the thought of her asking him about what she'd seen when she'd walked in on them.
Kylie glanced at Holiday. "So ... you and Burnett?"
Holiday rolled her eyes. "It was just a kiss, Kylie. Don't make it out to be something more."
Kylie let a slight smile work its way to her lips. Right now, she could use any good news at all. "Was it a good kiss?"
"Just a kiss and ... a mistake. We were talking about Perry and Miranda, about how sweet it was. The moment got away from us and ... Definitely a mistake."
"Why, Holiday? Why can't you give the guy a chance?"
Holiday frowned. "The only reason I let this happen was ... my guard was down because..." Kylie saw the shadows of pain in Holiday's eyes.
"You're afraid Burnett's the one in the casket?"
She nodded.
"Which means you care about him. Can't you see that?"
"I care, but caring for someone isn't enough. And we work together. Romance and work never go together."
"It could if you wanted it badly enough."
"Then I guess I don't want it that bad," Holiday said sternly. But Kylie knew that it was a lie.
And she suspected Holiday realized it, too.
They sat silently for a few minutes. "About the whole funeral vision thing...," Kylie said.
"Yeah?"
"I think ... I mean, there's a chance I fixed it."
Holiday studied her. "Fixed what?"
Kylie didn't feel right telling Holiday that Ellie had been going to run away. "I might have done something that took someone out of danger. So maybe a vampire won't die."
Holiday frowned. "I'd love to think that's true. But you can't change Fate."
Kylie recalled that those had been the words the ghost had whispered, but she refused to believe. "Then maybe it wasn't really Fate," she said.
"I wish I could believe that," Holiday said.
"I do believe it," Kylie said. But there was a part of her that doubted.
And when she let herself think about it, it tore her apart.
Holiday's phone rang. The camp leader picked it up, looked at the caller ID oddly, and then took the call.
"What's up?" Holiday asked, and then glanced over at Kylie. "She's fine." Holiday paused. "I'll tell her." She hung up and met Kylie's eyes. "That was Derek. He wanted to tell you that if you needed to talk, he's here for you. As a friend. He insisted I add that last part."
Kylie nodded and her chest swelled with emotion.
A knock came at the door. Holiday looked at Kylie. "Are you up to company? Derek's not the only one worried."
Kylie nodded.
"Come in," Holiday said. Della and Miranda popped into the office, their gazes filled with concern. Behind them came Lucas, Perry, Helen, and Jonathon.
"I'm fine," Kylie told them, but more tears filled her eyes. Tears because she knew that these people weren't just her friends. They were her family.
"We love you," Miranda said, her eyes tearing up. "And we want you to know that we don't care what you are."
Later that night, Kylie received another sign that her human brain pattern hadn't changed things. At first, she thought it was just a dream. She was watching Jane Doe resting in bed, running her hands over her pregnant belly, and staring at the sleeping man beside her. "I love you," she whispered. "But I have to do this."
Then things changed and Kylie was Jane. She slipped quietly out of the bed. Her body felt cumbersome with the round, heavy weight around her middle. Her heart felt broken, heavy. Kylie couldn't ever remember feeling so much sadness, as if she were about to lose something more precious than life.
She moved out of the dark room, looked back one more time at the sleeping man. Whoever he was, Jane loved him.
"I'm sorry." The two little words tumbled out of her mouth. The man rolled over, and Kylie got a quick glimpse of his face. Pale complexion, thick, dark brown-no, not really brown, but auburn hair.
Something about his face made Kylie want to continue to stare at him, but she had no control over what happened in these visions. Reliving Jane Doe's past, she turned and walked out. She moved to a closet, grabbed a long black coat, and slipped it around her body. Then she pulled out a suitcase-an old-fashioned piece of luggage, no wheels. Carrying it made walking while pregnant feel even more awkward.
Why are you leaving if you love him? The question flowed through Kylie's mind, but the vision continued, leaving the question hanging in the air unanswered.
With tears now streaming down her face, she walked out of the small house. A car, with its headlights off, pulled up to the curb. She got inside. Kylie wanted to see who was driving, but Jane was too busy crying, too busy trying to deal with a broken heart, to care about the driver.
"You're doing the best thing," a woman's voice said as the car pulled away. "He wouldn't understand."
The vision went black. Kylie tried to wake up but got pulled back in.
And not to a good place, either.
There was light now, but she didn't care. She was in too much pain. Something was ripping her insides apart. It reminded Kylie of the worst menstrual cramp she'd ever had. Her body contorted with pain. Her back arched and she screamed.
"It's not coming," someone said. The pain in her abdomen eased and she became aware of the emotional pain in her chest again.
"Don't let my baby die." She raised up on her elbow.
The man standing between her opened knees met Jane Doe's eyes. "I'd have to take it by C-section."
"Then do it!" Jane screamed.
"I'm not prepared for that. I don't have any anesthesia."
"I don't care," Jane said. "Don't let my baby die. I can take it. It's not like I'm human."
The man looked at the woman sitting beside him. "Get me a knife."