I was finding it difficult to swallow, my mind sick with memories of letting this guy kiss me, hold me. Oh God, he made love to me. I couldn’t believe this was the Logan who loved ice cream, who tenderly kissed me, held me in his arms, sang to me. Lies. Acid-dunked lies.
His monotone voice sounded like this was a casual conversation. I opened my mouth to ask about his other victims when I saw his jaw tighten and remembered what he’d said. I gritted my teeth together instead and let the betrayal fester.
“You’ll eat, drink, and even piss when I tell you.” His words ground out as if he was having trouble speaking, and his face was hard, eyes watching the road. “One mistake, Emily—one. And the guy at the farmhouse—Raul—he will break you and sell you to the highest bidder. If you want to remain with me ...” He accentuated the word want, “you do exactly as I say. Any questions?”
“Yeah. How many women have you fucked over? Let me guess, since you took your sweet ass time making me fall for you first, I’m guessing four girls a year. Do your bandmates know what you do in your spare time? What about your mother? Does she approve of your extracurricular activities?” My head was yanked back and the edge of a blade held to my throat.
Logan took in a long drawn in breath. “You see Jacob back there? The one who can easily slit your throat? Well, he doesn’t listen to me. He is Raul’s right-hand man and does exactly as Raul wants. And if Raul has told him to keep an eye on you and kill you for being a bitch then that’s what he’ll do, and I can’t stop him.” He paused then said, “Or, rather, I won’t.”
I felt the coldness of the blade slice into my skin. A trickle of blood dripped down my neck then slid onto my T-shirt and absorbed into a big red blotch. The creak of leather sounded as Jacob released me and sat back.
I wanted to fight, scream and rake my nails down Logan’s face until he bled like I was. I even considered jumping out of the car and taking my chances with my injuries, but instead I sat quietly and stared at the highway ahead. After ten minutes of silence Logan shoved a water bottle into my hand and two pills. “Swallow them.”
I considered throwing them back at him for about one second, and I think he knew it, because his frown deepened. Then I thought of hiding them under my tongue, but whatever the pills were they weren’t going to kill me; they could’ve easily done that by now.
I tossed the pills in my mouth then chugged every last drop of water. I was so damn thirsty that my skin felt like it was shriveling up like a dead animal left in the desert sun.
“Check her.”
Before I knew what was happening Jacob grabbed my chin and pressed—hard. I had no choice but to open my mouth. His finger slid inside, and I gagged and coughed as he crudely searched my mouth to make sure I’d swallowed the pills. I tasted cigarettes and wished I kept some water to wash out my mouth after he finished.
“Clean.”
Logan nodded. “We’re crossing the border.” He pulled out a passport from his back jean pocket, and I gasped when he flipped it open and I saw my picture. Then I saw with it the round circular plastic case—my birth control. He tossed it on my lap. God, he’d thought of everything. I did wonder why he cared if I was taking my pills or not. “You’re going to feel sleepy. If we’re lucky they won’t question us, but if they decide they want to talk to you and your wakened— We’re going to a wedding in Ohio. We’re all friends, and the bride is your friend, Kat. We have clothes in the trunk to prove all of this, so don’t even think of fuckin’ with it.”
Kat. Oh God, Kat. I closed my eyes and thought of the last time I’d seen her. We’d both been laughing. Happy. Another sob escaped my throat.
“Emily?” his voice was gruff and cut into me. “The story? Do you have it?”
I nodded.
“Words, Emily.”
“What?”
“You will always answer me with words.”
“Yes.” Humiliation swam over me, it was like he was talking to a child, and I couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that I’d had sex with this man. I’d been held in his arms, slept in them. I couldn’t grasp the idea that Logan was acting like this. He was going to be a rock star. He had a band. He had friends. Why would he give up everything to kidnap me? Had all that been a lie too?
I lay my head back on the seat and closed my eyes as tears threatened to fall. No, I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. He deserved my hate, not my tears.
Whatever he drugged me with began to take effect, and I couldn’t remain awake any longer. At one point I heard voices, and I opened my eyes briefly, but I was too tired, and I curled up against the window and went back to sleep.
I was kept drugged for three days. The car stopped briefly for food, gasoline, and bathroom breaks. Most of the time I slept, too groggy to fight Logan, and too weak to do anything but eat when given food and go to the bathroom with Jacob who stood outside the stall door. Logan had offered to take me the first time, but that was nixed when Jacob grabbed me. Ever since then Logan stayed with the car. Anywhere I went Jacob went. The other guy Dave, who looked Hispanic and spoke very little, kept to himself and never once touched me even when I stumbled getting out the car once and he was closest to assisting me.
The days were a foggy haze of terror. I felt like I was living in the bottom of a well, cold and alone, barely breathing, and when I did breathe it was stale air.
I heard Logan’s window slide down and then his sterile voice. “We’re here. Open the gate.”
Chapter 3
Day 6
Wherever we were it was completely surrounded by tall brick walls with guards standing at the gates and several walking the perimeter with German shepherds. The property was massive with several buildings and one main building that looked like a mansion. Logan drove up the long, narrow driveway then stopped at the house and shut off the car.
I looked at Logan, my body beginning to shake as I realized wherever we were was not a place I wanted to be. His hands gripped the steering wheel so tight that his knuckles turned white, and I could hear the leather crack beneath the pressure. It scared me. No, it terrified me.
He got out of the car as did the two men in the back, and I sat with my knees to my chest watching as he spoke to them and nod toward the house. Both men disappeared inside, and Logan stared at me through the windshield. It was like he was unable to move, his body stiff and looking every bit the fierce fighter, not the gentle rock star who wrote me a song I never had the chance to hear.
He strode toward me, and I wanted to disappear into the leather seat. I couldn’t control the trembling, and it made me angry that Logan would see it. I wanted to be tough, to have him feel nothing but anger from me, but the panic treading across my body was too overpowering.
The door flung open. “Out.”
It took me several tries to unclip my seatbelt, because my hands were shaking so badly. When I finally did, he snagged my forearm and pulled me out. “Do exactly as I say.” His voice was low as he spoke. “Don’t look at anyone. Eyes down at all times, and do not speak unless asked a question.”
“Where are we? Logan? Please why are you doing this to me?” I couldn’t help it. The words tumbled from my mouth in quick succession. What little connection I felt he tried to make shattered the moment Logan grabbed me by both shoulders and shook me.
“Don’t you get it yet, Emily? Raul owns you. He’s ruthless, and he’ll break you down, torture you, and when you beg him for mercy he’ll torture you some more.” His bruising fingers tightened, and I winced. “Do not fuck this up.”
I broke. I couldn’t help it, and I hated myself for falling so low as to let him or anyone else see me do it, but for that one second I let the fear take hold of me as I said, “I’m scared.”
Logan stared at me with eyes that were cold, dark, and without a spark of ... anything. “You should be.”
My breath hitched, and it was at that moment I knew I had to face my fear head-on and conquer it or I was going to die. Logan wasn’t going to save me; only I could do that.
Walking into what looked like a huge dining hall, I kept my head down like Logan told me to, but my eyes drifted upward. It was an uncontrollable reaction. Survival maybe, I didn’t know why, but I was facing the unknown, and I had to look at what the unknown was.
The room was filled with over a dozen men, most sitting at a long wooden table laden with food. I could smell the aroma of cheeses, wines, and the sweetness of an array of fruits. The sound of laughter echoed off the walls, along with the clinking of glasses and men talking and shouting.
But it was the subtle sounds of groaning and sobbing that caught my attention. My heart started pounding harder and faster. The noises were wrong. They reminded me of trapped animals in cages and their sobs of despair. I raised my head, eyes searching the room as the sounds pulled at me.
Lying shivering on the floor was a naked girl.
Then another tied to a chair.
Beneath the table.
Over in the corner of the room, a girl kneeling.
My eyes widened, and my breath caught in my throat as I stared horrified at the women ... They were young, some maybe younger than me.
My stomach rolled and lurched, and I staggered backward, fighting against Logan’s grip as I heaved with revulsion at the scene before me.
I shook my head back and forth over and over. “No. No ...” I repeated, my hand over my mouth.
One girl knelt at a man’s feet while he fed her pieces of meat like a dog. She had a metal collar on that had a chain attached to the man’s belt. She was naked, and I could see red welts running the length of her spine.
Beneath the table, another girl was between an overweight man’s legs. She was ... her mouth was on his cock as he groaned and pushed her face back and forth into him.
But it was the girl kneeling on all fours nearest me that was the one sobbing quietly. Her cheek was pressed into the floor with her butt in the air as a young man pumped into her from behind. He was also naked and wearing a collar, and he had scars running the length of his back.
“Emily.”
Alfonzo was standing beside the girl laughing and drinking his wine as he watched with a sickening gleam in his eyes. Another man, tall and lean, who looked in his thirties stood beside Alfonzo watching as well, but he wasn’t smiling. The girl. Oh God, the girl’s eyes stared at ... nothing. Blank and empty, yet filled with tears. Her body rocked back and forth, her hair swinging with the motion. It was when Alfonzo raised a crop and hit the guy on the back and said, “Harder” that I lost it.
I was hyperventilating, and I couldn’t hold it together any longer as I turned my head away and bent over coughing and choking. I couldn’t look as a girl screamed, and I knew ... I knew it was that girl with the dead eyes.
“No. No.” My mind was like a tornado filled with the sounds and images of what Logan had walked me into. Nightmares couldn’t compare to this. What I thought couldn’t exist in this world ... The realization that people could be so cruel. That this ... slaves ... girls ... It was hidden from the eyes of the world, but it was alive and real.