Zoey
Stevie Rae and I were supposed to meet Thanatos in her classroom. I'd called her while we were in the short bus on our way to campus. We hadn't spoken much. All she'd said was that she knew about Neferet's press conference and to come to her room right away.
The House of Night smelled like smoke.
The whole school reeked. As we pulled into the parking lot I realized that it didn't just stink like smoke. Sadly I'd had enough experience to recognize the sharp scent of fear.
The normal school day hadn't started, that much was super obvious. There were fledglings milling all around in gossipy little groups. They definitely weren't heading to first hour. That should have been cool. I mean, what kid doesn't love a snow day or a random water leak or whatever? But somehow it didn't feel cool. It felt confusing and not safe.
"Okay, so, I realize it's totally not normal for me to say this, but I think Thanatos should have made everyone go to classes today." Aphrodite creepily echoed my thoughts again as we unloaded from the bus. "What's going on instead is bullshit and a recipe for holy-fuck-we-can't-make-it-without-Neferet panic." Aphrodite made a sweeping gesture that took in the clusters of whispering fledglings as well as the vampyres and fledglings who were working at one of two grim jobs-clearing the rubble from the stables or adding to the enormous network of wooden beams and planks that would become Dragon Lankford's funeral pyre.
"I am in agreement with you, my beauty," Darius said grimly.
Silently, I sent up a quick but fervent prayer: Nyx, help me to say and do the right thing-and help my circle, my friends, to be strong and sure. Then I faced my group and followed my gut. "Okay, as much as I hate to admit it out loud, well, or even not out loud, Aphrodite's right."
Aphrodite tossed back her long blond hair. "Of course I am."
"This school needs a big dose of normal and, sadly, I think we're the best part of normal they're gonna get right now."
"That mean they's fucked," Kramisha said. She had on her yellow bobbed wig and stacked heels that had to have been five inches of black patent leather. Her skirt was short and super sparkly. Somehow she pulled off the crazy look, making me consider (for about 2.5 seconds) wearing heels more often.
"I'm being serious, Kramisha," I said.
"So am I," she said.
"Look, y'all. We can be normal. A new normal. One that's more interestin'," Stevie Rae said with a big grin up at Rephaim.
Aphrodite snorted. I ignored her, smiled at Stevie Rae, and kept talking. "We're going to split up. Part of you guys go to the stables. Part of you go to Dragon's pyre. Remember, be normal," I said sternly. "Act like you would regularly act. We need to get a grip and help guide things back to something that seems manageable. Look, right now it feels like we've been attacked from everywhere. The stables were on fire. Cats were killed. Dragon's dead. And now Neferet isn't just an evil nutjob. She's an evil nutjob who has involved the human community in stuff that's way beyond their understanding or their ability to deal. We gotta be strong and visible. We gotta keep the House of Night together. Like I told Thanatos last night-we're a lot more than bickering children and it's about time we stand up, stand together, and get the respect we deserve."
"Wise counsel, Priestess," Darius said, making me want to hug him. "I will go to Dragon's pyre and spread calm there." He smiled warmly at Aphrodite. "Come with me. Your influence will be good for the Warriors who are bereft over the Sword Master's death."
"Usually, I'd say, wherever you go, I go, handsome," Aphrodite said. "But I need a little Z time, so I'm gonna go with her to talk to Thanatos. How 'bout I meet you at the pyre afterward?"
Her words surprised me, and I thought about the fact that, except for Shaylin earlier that day, I hadn't really talked to anyone since the reveal ritual. The bus ride back with Dragon's body had been silent and difficult. Then there had been the fire, the dead cats, and-thankfully-sleep, though not enough of it. All of that meant no one had backed me into a corner about Aurox. Was Aphrodite getting ready to? I glanced at her. She'd tiptoed and was giving Darius a kiss. She looked like she always did-crazy about her Warrior and kinda bitchy about everything else.
"I'm gonna go with Z, too," Stevie Rae's voice broke into my neurotic study of Aphrodite. "When we get done talkin' to Thanatos I'll be out by the funeral pyre. You're gonna be needin' some serious grounding there, and earth is the right element for that." She gave Rephaim a quick kiss. "Will you meet me out there?"
"I will." He kissed her back, touching her cheek gently. Then he glanced at me. "If no one has an objection, I would like to patrol around the wall of the school, especially the eastern wall. If Neferet's threads of Darkness are slithering around we need to know about it."
"That sounds like a good idea. You guys okay with that?" I asked, looking to Stark and Darius for input. The two Warriors nodded. "Okay, great." Then I turned my attention to Stevie Rae. "I think invoking your element is a really good idea, too, Stevie Rae. Damien, Shaunee, and Erin-you guys keep your elements close. If they can help strengthen or support, call on them. Just don't be totally obvious and..." My words trailed off as I fully realized what I was saying. "No. That's wrong. If you need to use your element do be obvious."
"I get your point, Z," Damien said. "It's about time the House of Night is aware that there are prodigious forces of good working on our side against all that Darkness."
"Prodigious means real big," Stevie Rae translated.
"We know what it means," Kramisha said.
"I didn't," Shaunee said.
"Me, neither," Erin said.
I wanted to grin at the Twins and say it was nice to have them making twin-like comments, but as soon as Erin had spoken she'd blushed bright pink and turned away from Shaunee, who was looking super uncomfortable, so I gave up-temporarily-and made a mental note to light a red and blue candle for the two of them and ask Nyx to give them some extra help. If I could find the time. Hell, if Nyx could find the time.
I stifled a sigh and kept talking. "Okay, good. So, separate into groups. Go do normal things-like get some study books and go to the library."
"That's not my normal," I heard Johnny B mutter, and a bunch of the kids around him laughed.
I liked the sound of their laughter. It was normal.
"Then go grab a basketball or something boy-like in the field house," I said, not able to not grin at them.
"I'm goin' to the cafeteria. The kitchen at the tunnels looks like locusts been through it. Z, we need to make a run to the grocery before we head back there," Kramisha said.
"Yeah, well, that's normal. Go ahead. Anyone who didn't get to eat before we left go with her. And, guys, spread out. Don't just eat in clumps. Talk to the other kids," I said.
The fledglings made noises of agreement and organized themselves, breaking into little groups around Darius, the Twins, Damien, and Kramisha. Rephaim headed off by himself. I watched his back for a little while, wondering if he'd ever really fit in, and if he didn't what that would do to his relationship with Stevie Rae. I glanced at her. She was gazing after Rephaim, too, with a look of total adoration. I chewed my lip and continued to worry.
"You okay, Z?" Stark's voice was pitched low, and he put his arm around my shoulders.
"Yeah," I said, leaning into him for a moment. "I'm just obsessively worrying, as per usual."
He squeezed me. "That's cool, as long as you don't start bawling. The whole snot cry thing you do is seriously unattractive."
I punched him playfully. "I never cry."
"Oh, yeah, that's right, and you never snot, either," he said, smiling his cocky, cute grin at me.
"I know! Amazing, right?" I teased.
"Riiiight." He drew the word out and kissed me on the top of my head.
"Hey," I said, still nestled safely in his arms. "Would you go to the stables and give Lenobia a hand? I'm going to meet with Thanatos, then I'll come to the stables and find you."
He hesitated for just a moment and I felt his arms tighten around me. Stark didn't like to separate from me, especially when crazy stuff was going on, but he nodded, said a quick, "I'll be there, watching for you." Then he kissed my forehead, let me go, and started off toward the stables. I shivered, chilled after the warmth of his touch. The other kids began to drift away in their groups, with Stevie Rae and Aphrodite hanging back with me.
"I'm going with you two, but wait a sec. First I'm gonna give my mom a call. She needs to know Neferet isn't just full of bullshit, but full of danger."
"Do you think she'll listen to you?" I asked.
"Absolutely not," she said without hesitation. "But I'm gonna try anyway."
"Why don't you just call your daddy? I mean, he's the mayor and not your momma," Stevie Rae said.
"In the LaFont household Mother is boss. If there's any chance of Mr. Mayor getting a clue about Neferet, it'll come from her."
"Good luck with that," I said.
"Yeah, whatever," Aphrodite said, before taking out her phone and moving away from us.
Surprising me, Shaylin stepped away from one of the departing groups and walked to my side. "Can I come with you guys?" Her voice was soft, but she'd spoken clearly and her chin was lifted as if she was ready for a fight.
"Why do you want to?" I asked.
"I want to ask Thanatos about my colors. I know you guys told me to keep quiet about my gift, and I understand why. It was definitely something Neferet didn't need to know. But she's not High Priestess here anymore, and I have questions that I need to find answers to. Like Damien said, it's been a long time since anyone has had True Sight. Well, Thanatos is smart. And old. I figured she could maybe give me some answers. If either of you don't mind, that is," she added quickly.
I looked at Stevie Rae. "You're her High Priestess. Are you okay with that?"
"I dunno for sure. What do you think?"
"I think if we can't trust Thanatos we're totally screwed," I said honestly.
"Well, then I think it's time to circle the wagons, and believe Thanatos is one of the good guys. So, I suppose I'm okay with it."
"Yeah, okay," I said.
"Thanks," Shaylin said.
"Well, that was a waste of time." Aphrodite joined us as she put her phone back into her super cute sparkly gold Valentino purse. "At least it wasn't a waste of much time."
"She wouldn't listen to you at all?" I asked.
"Oh, she listened. Then she said that she had two words for me: Nelly Vanzetti. Then she hung up."
"Huh?" I said.
"Nelly Vanzetti is my mom's shrink," Aphrodite said.
"Why would your momma give you her name?" Stevie Rae asked.
"Because, bumpkin, that's my mom's way of telling me she thinks I'm sounding super crazy. Not that she cares whether I'm actually crazy-she's just letting me know she doesn't care to listen to me, but she'll pay her shrink to." Aphrodite shrugged. "Same old thing."
"That's really mean," Shaylin said.
Aphrodite narrowed her blue eyes. "Why are you here?"
"She has a gift," Stevie Rae said.
"My give-a-shit level is very low about that," Aphrodite said.
"I have questions for Thanatos," Shaylin said.
"So she's going with us," I said.
"Whatever." Aphrodite gave her a dismissive look. "Go on, then. Ahead of us. I gotta talk to these two, without colorful ears listening."
"Go ahead of us, Shaylin," I said before the two of them could start arguing. Again. "We'll meet you in Thanatos's office."
Shaylin nodded, frowned at Aphrodite, and then walked away.
Aphrodite held up her hand. "Yeah, I know, I should be nicer, blah, blah. But she bugs me. She reminds me too much of a mini-Kim Kardashian, which means she's useless, irritating, and way too visible."
I looked at Stevie Rae, expecting her to argue. All she did was shake her head and say, "I am tired of beating a dang dead horse."
"Dead horse? That's all you've got? Really?" Aphrodite said.
"I'm not speakin' to you at all ever again," Stevie Rae told her.
"Good. Now, on to the important stuff. You two aren't gonna like either of the things I have to say, but you need to listen up-unless you want to be like my mom."
"We're listening," I said.
Stevie Rae kept her lips pressed together, but nodded.
"First, bumpkin, I know you've gone all goo-goo-eyed about Kalona since he dropped water on your birdboy and resurrected him-"
"He cried immortal tears on his son and magickally brought him back from near death. Jeeze Louise, you were there! You saw it," Stevie Rae said.
"You're not speaking to me, remember? But you just made my point for me. Up until a few hours ago we believed Kalona was as batshit crazy and dangerous as Neferet. Now he's Death's Warrior. The school's gonna slobber all over him, just like they did after he broke out of the ground. We're going to show more sense. Or, at least I'm going to show more sense. It'd be nice if you two joined me."
"I'll never trust him." I spoke quietly, saying words that came from deep in my heart.
"Z, he gave Thanatos his oath," Stevie Rae said.
I met her gaze. "He killed Heath. He killed Stark. He only brought Stark back because Nyx forced him to pay a life debt for Heath. Stevie Rae, I was in the Otherworld with him. Kalona asked when Nyx would forgive him. She told him he could only ask when he was worthy of her forgiveness."
"Maybe that's what he's working toward," she said.
"And maybe he's a manipulative, lying, rapist and murderer," Aphrodite countered. "If Zoey and I are wrong, then great. You can say 'told ya so' and we'll all smile and throw an effing party. If we're right we will not have been caught off guard when a fallen god goes on another rampage."
Stevie Rae sighed. "I know-I know. You're makin' sense. I'm not gonna trust him one hundred percent."
"Fine. But keep an eye on your birdboy, too. He trusts his dad one hundred percent, which means Kalona can use him. Again."
Stevie Rae's expression tightened, but she nodded. "Yeah, I will."
"Second"-Aphrodite shifted the bulk of her attention to me- "explain the weird shit that went through your mind when you called that fucking bull by Heath's name last night."
"What?" Stevie Rae blurted. "That's not true. Is it, Z?"
Okay, lying would be easy. I could just say that Aphrodite had obviously lost her mind and had been hearing things. I mean, there had been a crapload of Crazy happening all at once last night-not to mention all of the elements manifesting so powerfully that nothing was totally clear except my mom's murder by Neferet and the fact that she was the Consort of Darkness.
And I almost did lie.
Then I remembered what lying to my friends had cost me before-not just their trust for a while, but it had cost me respect for myself. I didn't feel good when I lied. I felt out of sync with the Goddess and the path I believe she wanted me to walk.
So, I drew a deep breath and told the truth in one burst of words: "I looked through the Seer Stone at Aurox and I saw Heath and it freaked me out and I called his name and Aurox turned and looked at me before he started changing back into that bull thing and that's why when he charged me I just stood there and told him he wouldn't hurt me. The end."
"You have lost your fucking mind. Shit, and I think I threw away my mom's shrink's number too soon. You need to medicate and evaluate."
"Well, I'm gonna be nicer than Aphrodite, but it just doesn't make any sense, Z. How could Heath be around Aurox?"
"I don't know! And he wasn't around him. It was like Heath glowed on Aurox. Or at least shadowed him with a moonstone shine." I wanted to scream my frustration at not being able to describe what I'd glimpsed.
"Was it like a ghost?" Stevie Rae asked.
"That might make a little bit of sense," Aphrodite said, nodding to Stevie Rae, as if the two of them were figuring through it. "We were in the middle of a ritual evoking Death. Heath's dead. Maybe we snagged his ghost."
"I don't think so," I said.
"But you don't know for sure, right?" Stevie Rae said.
"No, I don't know anything for sure except that the Seer Stone is old magick, and old magick is strong and unpredictable. Hell, it's not even supposed to be anywhere except the Isle of Skye, so I don't know what's going on with me seeing stuff through it here." I threw up my hands. "Maybe I imagined it. Maybe I didn't. This is weird, even for me. I thought I saw Heath, and then Aurox changed completely into that bull thing and ran off."
"Things were happenin' real fast," Stevie Rae said.
"Next time you see Aurox you need to look through that damn stone at him, that's for sure," Aphrodite said. "And don't be alone with him."
"I'm not planning on it! I don't even know where he is."
"Probably back with Neferet," Aphrodite said.
I should've kept my mouth shut, but I heard myself speak up. "He said he'd chosen differently."
"Yeah, right after he killed Dragon and almost killed Rephaim," Aphrodite said.
I sighed.
"What did Stark say about it?" Aphrodite asked. When I didn't answer she raised a blond brow. "Oh, I get it. You haven't told him, right?"
"Right."
"Well, I can't blame you for that, Z," Stevie Rae spoke gently.
"He's her Warrior-her Guardian," Aphrodite insisted. "However annoying and arrogant he can be, he needs to know that Zoey has a thing for Aurox."
"I do not!"
"Okay, not Aurox, but Heath and you think Heath might be Aurox." Aphrodite shook her head. "Do you see how Crazy Town that sounds?"
"My life is Crazy Town," I said.
"Stark needs to know that you might be vulnerable to Aurox," Aphrodite said firmly.
"I am not vulnerable to him!"
"Tell her, bumpkin."
Stevie Rae wouldn't meet my eyes.
"Stevie Rae?"
She sighed and finally looked at me. "If you think there's even a little chance that Heath is haunting Aurox or whatever, that means you're not gonna think clear 'bout him. I know. If I lost Rephaim and then thought I saw him around some other guy, even if it seemed crazy, that guy would be able to get to me. Here." She pointed to her heart. "And most of the time that overrules here." She pointed to her head.
"So tell Bow Boy what you think you saw," Aphrodite said.
I really hated it, but I knew they were right. "Fine. It's gonna suck, but fine. I'll tell him."
"And I'm telling Darius," said Aphrodite.
"Well, I'm tellin' Rephaim," Stevie Rae added.
"Why!" I wanted to explode.
"Because the Warriors around you need to know," Aphrodite said.
"Fine," I repeated through gritted teeth. "But that's it. I'm sick of people talking about me and my boy issues."
"Well, Z, you do got you some boy issues," Stevie Rae said lightly, hooking her arm through mine.
"We need to tell Thanatos, also," Aphrodite said as the three of us started to walk toward her classroom. "Her affinity is Death. It makes sense that she understands ghosts or whatever."
"Why don't we just put it in the Tulsa World and have Neferet write a damn Q and A about it?" I said.
"That's almost a cuss word. Watch yourself. Damn is an entry word. Next thing you know, fuck will be flying out of your mouth," Aphrodite said.
"Flying fuck? That just sounds wrong," Stevie Rae told her, shaking her head.
I picked up the pace, practically dragging Stevie Rae along with me and making Aphrodite jog to catch up with us. I didn't listen to them as they argued about cuss words. Instead I worried.
I worried about our school.
I worried about the Aurox/Heath issue.
I worried about telling Stark about the Aurox/Heath issue.
And I worried about my clenching stomach and the possibility of my IBS acting up in the middle of everything. Again.