"No, sir. You've got a lot more hair than he does, and yours is white. His is kind of a dark gray, and there isn't that much of it."
"As tall as I am?"
"No, sir. More like me, like I said. Sir, don't you think we ought to go back to the fire?"
"If you wish, Hide. I intend to ask you a great many more questions, however." I started up the hill to our left. "Will it trouble you to talk where the others can overhear us? I'm going to ask you about the place you came from, your mother and your brothers and so forth. Will you continue to be open and honest with me then, with Duko Sfido and the rest listening?"
"Yes, sir. I'll try, sir. Only..."
"Only what?"
"They'll know I'm a foreigner then, sir."
He was hanging back, and I motioned to him to follow me. "They will. But if I call you Cuoio, and you continue to eat as they do and speak as they do-you didn't mention that, but it's the most important thing of all-it will make very little difference. Besides, I'm going to adopt you. You've searched here for your father without finding him. Will it trouble you to call me Father?"
He hesitated, but when we had walked a short distance more he said, "No, sir."
"Good boy!" Oreb bobbed his approval.
"Does he understand everything we say, sir?"
"Call me Father, Cuoio."
"All right. Father, the camp's back that way. Why are we going up here?"
I slipped on a snow-covered stone, saved by my staff. "Because it's shorter. That's one reason, at least. I want to ask you about your mother and your home, Cuoio; but I can do it when were sitting at the fire warming ourselves. I want to ask about your father, too; and I had better do that now, since we're going to tell others you're my son. What sort of man was he?"
"He's a good man, sir."
I shook my head.
"Father, I mean. He always worked really hard so we'd have enough to eat, and he protected my mother and my brothers and me. Things are pretty bad where we live. People stealing and killing. Only nobody ever tried anything like that when he was around, and he didn't do it himself, either."
"Did you love him, Cuoio?"
"Yes, Father."
"Good boy!" Oreb hopped from the head of my stick to Hide's shoulder.
"For duty's sake? To make your mother happy?"
"No, sir. Father, I mean. He was my father, and I just loved him. He used to take me out in our boat sometimes so I could fish, even when he was really tired."
"I see."
"He was always pretty strict with us, but that was because Sinew got bitten by a inhumu when he was real little and almost died. After that he was really worried Hoof and me would get bitten too, and so was Mother. Then there was people from New Viron that would come out to the Lizard sometimes. That's where we live. On the Lizard, Lizard Island."
"I want you to sling that slung gun you're holding, Private Cuoio. First engage the safety. You may sling it behind your left shoulder, if you don't want to disturb my bird."
"All right." The click of the safety was followed by the rattle of sling swivels.
"Try not to make so much noise. Listen to me now-listen very carefully."
"Yes, Father."
"I've been trying to get you to walk beside me, motioning for you to catch up."
"Yes, Father. It's just that I'm kind of tired after riding all day."
"I'm tired too. Can you hear me when I speak this softly?"
"Yes, Father."
"Good. You have good ears. I no longer want you beside me. Do you understand? Stay well behind me. Oreb, it might be best for you to go; but if you insist on staying here, you must be completely quiet."
"No talk."
Hide chuckled softly.
"That's the way, Oreb, but quieter than that." I had an idea then, and said, "I'm going to hold my staff in back of me, like this. Take hold of the end and follow me."
He did. "Father?"
"What is it?"
"It's all thorns up there where the hill's sort of split. I don't think we can get through there."
"The worst thing we could do would be to turn back here. To turn our backs. He wouldn't harm my horse this afternoon. Perhaps the god-spell hasn't worn off yet, and he won't harm us tonight."
"Sir? Father?"
"Keep your grip on my staff," I said as we stepped into the crowding thornbushes; and then I saw him. I had expected him to crouch, although I cannot tell why. He was standing instead, with all eight feet solidly planted, so large that his great green eyes were on a level with mine. Catching the starlight, they seemed luminous, shining in the darkness like gems malign as Green itself.
"Sir...?" Hide was pulling the staff so hard he almost took it out of my hand.
"Be quiet. Winter is hard on animals. He's very hungry."
Hide let go of my staff. I heard the faint jingle of his sling swivels, and said as sharply as I dared, "Stop that!"
The baletiger came toward us, slipping between the thorns step by slow step. I ought to have been terrified, but I was merely weak and sick. I pitied him, and now that I have leisure to look back upon that moment, I think it likely that he pitied me.
"Is Mucor there?" I whispered. "Is it Mucor?"
There was no reply save the merciless winter wind's. I heard Oreb stir on my shoulder, fluffing out his feathers.
"Yes," I whispered to the baletiger, "make them come to us."
He sniffed the hand that grasped my staff as a huge dog might. For a moment his mighty body rubbed against me, and I could feel his muscles slither beneath his thick, soft winter fur. A second later he was bounding down the slope past Hide, and was gone.
"Come up here," I told Hide. "I want you to sit beside me on this flat stone. We won't be going back to the fire for another hour or so."
"I can't, Father." (I could hear his teeth chatter.) "I can't even move, sir."
"The thornbushes?"
"Yes. F-Father. That animal?"
"What about it?" I went to him and took him by the sleeve.
"Was it a-a...?"
"I believe so, yes. Come with me, Cuoio."
He did, and sat upon Fava's grave when I pointed out the stone. I sat down beside him; instinctively we huddled together for warmth, father and son.
"Bird talk?"
My nose had been running all day, and was running worse than ever. I had it in a rag that one of the troopers had given me the day before, and did not reply. Hide said, "I think so, only not loud."
"We're going to shoot game here, Oreb," I explained when I could. "He's going to drive it toward us, if he can find any; and we're going to shoot it for him. I should say Cuoio is. I promised he would, so he must."
Hide nodded; I felt the motion rather than saw
"Are you a good shot?" I asked him.
"Pretty good, Father. My father, I mean my real one, had a needier he'd brought from the Long Sun Whorl, only he took it with him when he went away."
"To Pajarocu."
"Yes, sir. It gets kind of complicated."
I nodded. "We have time. Will you tell me, Cuoio? I'd like very much to hear about it."
He cleared his throat softly. "If you'll tell me a couple of things too, sir. I've told you a lot, and you haven't told me anything."
"What I've said would have told you a lot, if you'd been paying attention. Just a couple?"
"Maybe more than that, Father. Please? Like, why'd you want to see me?"
"Isn't it natural for a father to want to see his own son, Cuoio?"
"Really, I mean."
"Do you imagine that I asked my question in jest? I was completely serious."
"You're not really my father!"
"If you say so where the others can overhear you, we will be in difficulties."
"All right."
"Where is Hoof, Cuoio?"
"Out looking for our real father. He was supposed to go north and I was supposed to go south. I did, too, or pretty much. How did you make the baletiger do what you told him?"
"I didn't. Because he had spared my horse, I agreed to do as he asked. You and Hoof left your mother alone?"
"She made us," Hide said miserably. "She made us both go out and look for Father."
"You didn't want to."
"We did, only we didn't want to leave her by herself like that. Hoof wanted to go and tried to get me to promise to stay, only I said for him to stay and I'd go. She made us both go."
"Leaving her there alone."
Hide nodded wretchedly.
"How long has your father been gone?"
"About three... Did you hear that, sir?"
"No. What did you hear?"
"He's roaring, way off somewhere. He roars, and then he stops, and then he roars again."
Oreb bobbed agreement. "Bird hear!"
"He's trying to frighten game. Greenbuck, I suppose. He isn't fast enough to run them down, you see. He has to lie in wait and spring at them, and they don't move around very much in weather like this. There is little food for them anywhere, and they try to find shelter from the wind."
"Sometimes they die, too. My brother, my other brother, I mean-"
"Sinew."
"Yes, sir. Sinew. He told me one time he'd find them in the winter sometimes, starved to death or else frozen. He'd skin them and take that, but there wouldn't be any meat."
"They'll be poor soon," I agreed, "and few."
"I left my slug gun with her," Hide said. "Not this one, I got this one here. I was supposed to take it, and Hoof took his. Only I left mine where she'd find it. These people would come out from New Viron after Father and Sinew went away, and take things and make us do whatever they said. So Mother traded for slug guns for Hoof and me, so we could fight."
"No cut!"
"I wasn't going to cut anything."
I said, "He means you are not to shoot him. You wouldn't anyway, I know.
"He's going to shoot food for the baletiger, Oreb, and perhaps for us as well. Fish heads.
"Go on, please, Cuoio."
"Shoot good?"
"Sure," Hide declared. "She got them so we could fight if they came anymore, only we didn't have to. Hoof shot at them a couple of times while they were still on their boat, and they went away. Only I'm afraid they'll come back now that we're gone. Mother knows how to shoot, though."
I nodded, recalling the fighting in the streets of Viron, and our desperate battle with the Trivigauntis in the tunnels under the city.
"We figured to go over to the big island and hunt the way Sinew used to, and we did. We didn't have much stuff we could trade for cartridges though." Hide laughed softly. "So after we'd missed a little we learned how to get up real close and put the slug right where we wanted it." He sighed, and I knew that he was thinking of past hunts. "You know why they call these greenbuck, sir?"
"Say Father. You must learn to do that, just as I must learn to call you Cuoio."
"All right, Father."
Now I, too, heard the baletiger.
"Do you think he'll give us some, Father? There's not much to eat back at the fire, and I didn't bring much." He raised his slug gun to his shoulder as he spoke.
"If you can get enough for him and us too."
Oreb croaked softly, wordlessly, as the first game came in sight.
I told Hide, "Not now, my son-wait until they're closer." He nodded, his head scarcely moving as he squinted down the barrel.
Chapter 20
Back at the Battlefield
I am writing this in bed, in the little bedroom with a fireplace, and one brick wall, and one window, that I shared with Sfido. I have just spoken with Jahlee. Oreb is hopping about the little table they put beside my bed and eyeing the breakfast on my tray. I told him to take whatever he wanted, and he seems to be trying to decide. He would like a fish head better than any of it, I feel sure. Hide has gone to fish through the ice in the river, which is what everyone seems to be doing at present except for our prisoners and Inclito's coachman, who is guarding them.
And Jahlee, Oreb, and me. I must rest.
I have been ill. Perhaps I can begin there. A strange sort of sickness-no pain, just very tired. We brought the fourgoat back to camp, Hide going ahead to be sure no one fired. It was very welcome and was skinned and eaten at once. I ate some of the meat. Much less than the others, but they were not sick.
No matter. I was ill, I feel quite certain, before we reached the fire.
Jahlee came in again to chide me for not eating. "You can't live as we do, you know!"
I asked whether she had been feeding from my veins. She denied it, but conceded that another might have, and examined me for the punctures of fangs, finding none.
Or so she said.
"We don't bring all sickness. Besides, you have a fever. We don't do that."
I agreed, recalling Teasel. How cold her skin was!
I should have written down our earlier talk as well. I see that I did not. In summary:
She asked why I had not betrayed her. I tried to explain.
"But you hate us!"
As a group, I said, because you nearly killed my son and for the hideous conditions on Green where my son is.
She pointed out that I could have told my troopers, who would have shot and killed her, and burned her body.
I conceded that it was so.
"Would you rather see me the way I looked in Gaon?" She began to change as she spoke-taller, her face lengthening, and so on. I said it might be hazardous for her.
"Somebody might try to rape me, you mean. It's been tried before."
I was-am-surprised. That lean, wicked, famished, thin-lipped face would not have appealed to me even when I was Hide's age.
My head aches.
"Silk well!" proclaims Oreb, which would seem to mean that I must write again. To confess the truth, I am far from well, too weak almost to stand; nevertheless, I certainly feel better. I have an appetite again-I wanted no food at all while I was so ill and for some time before I realized I was. I ate a little of the fourgoat, I remember that. Hide would have been hurt if I had not. I feel better now than I did when I conducted my experiment, and I thought myself much better then. No doubt I was.