Ceaseless (Existence Trilogy #3) - Page 5/25

Chapter Four

Dank

I was going to strangle Gee. Pagan was warming up to me. She was in my arms and I had found a modicum of peace from the fear that had gripped me since the moment I found out I could lose her.

“Dank,” Gee replied saucily. I knew she was right. I hadn’t finished taking souls for the night but I’d known Pagan was here. I could feel her emotions. Her soul still called out to me even though she no longer remembered me.

“Um, I’ll leave you two to work this out. I promised Jay a dance anyway,” Pagan said backing away.

Don’t leave me.

Pagan froze. Damn. I’d spoken to her soul. She’d heard me. The confusion in her eyes as she studied me made me hope she remembered; that her human brain was over-powered by her soul. But she shook her head and continued moving away. “I gotta go,” she said hastily then spun around and fled.

“Smart move, asshole. You just scared the shit outta her,” Gee said with a sigh.

“Why’d you interrupt us? I know my duty. I don’t need you to screw with this.”

Gee raised both her blond pierced eyebrows. “Oh really? Well, if you would stop lusting over Pagan long enough to remember that you have a job to do. You have to let her make her own choices. If you did that, I wouldn’t have to step in. Yeah, you had her all wrapped up in that sexy, dark-spell thing you have going on. But her soul is connected to Jay’s. She needs to face that. Then she has to decide. You can’t come in and intercept her every time she gets close to him.”

Snarling, I stalked toward the exit. I didn’t need to hear this. She was right and I hated that she was right. Pagan had to get close to Jay again. This was a competition. One I may very well lose. I winced as the pain sliced through me. Losing Pagan wasn’t something I could accept.

I glanced at the dance floor and my eyes immediately found Pagan’s. She was watching me go. Jay wasn’t with her. She stood alone on the outside of the moving bodies, her attention completely focused on me. I stopped and stared back at her. I took in the tilt of her head, the softness of her lips and the interest in her eyes. I’d intrigued her tonight. That was a good thing. Would the Pagan who didn’t see souls on a daily basis, be as accepting of Death as the one who had grown up seeing a part of this world that others were blind to. Jay came up behind her and touched her shoulder and she turned back to look at him. I couldn’t stay to see this.

Pagan

“Am I gonna get that dance now?” Jay asked loudly over the music.

I glanced back at Dank to see if he was still there. He seemed sad or lonely. I wanted to go talk to him. But he was gone. It was not a good idea to be interested in a lead singer. Yes, he was hard to ignore, but it was in my best interest to find a way to get over his appeal.

“Yes, I,” I stopped mid-sentence. The girlfriend was back and she was slipping her hands around Jay’s waist. Jay’s frustration was obvious on his face.

“Come dance with me,” she cooed as she slid both her hands underneath his shirt. Yep, that was enough for me.

“I need to go. It was nice to see you again,” I said quickly and made my escape before he could say anymore. Scanning the bar I found Gee sitting there with her legs crossed and a smirk on her face. Miranda was still dancing with Nathan. As much as I wanted to leave I didn’t want to end the night early for Miranda. She was obviously having a good time. I made my way over to Gee. Maybe I could just get a taxi home and leave her here with Miranda.

“What happened with frat boy number two?” Gee asked as she took another drink of her drink.

“I’m ready to go. If I get a taxi, can you wait around on Miranda?”

Gee shrugged, “Yeah I guess. It’s still pretty early. Why are you heading out already?”

Because the guy I wanted to be dancing with was gone.

“I’m tired. It’s been a long day.” I replied.

“Okay. See ya later then,” Gee replied and wiggled her long black nails at me.

I looked back to check on Miranda one last time; the smile on her face as she talked to the Nathan guy was my answer. She was fine. Good for her.

Smoke was everywhere. I was lost inside of it. I couldn’t panic. If I wanted to survive this I couldn’t panic. My chest felt tight from the lack of oxygen. Slowly I waded through the smoke, praying I’d make it out before the darkness took over. A small light appeared through the thickness and hope pushed me harder. My legs felt heavy. The closer I got to the light the slower my body moved. It was becoming harder to pick up my legs and put one in front of the other. My knees buckled and I realized I wasn’t going to make it. The light was there. So close. But I wasn’t going to get to it. The smoke was going to claim me. I took another strangled breath as my knees hit the cement underneath me.

Strong arms encircled me and the suffocation was lifted. I took a deep clear breath. The arms held me close to a firm warm chest. I tried to open my eyes but I couldn’t.

“You’re okay. I’m here.” The deep voice assured me. I knew that voice. I gripped the shirt that covered the body that held me. I wanted to see him. I knew him.

“Help,” I begged. My eyes wouldn’t open.

“Always. You’re fine. This is just a bad dream. I’m here.” He assured me. I believed him. I couldn’t see him, but my body knew it was safe. Relaxing in his arms, I breathed deeply again.

“I want to see you,” I told him.

“I wish you could. You will again one day.” His confusing reply was the last he said before the loud blaring alarm went off.

My eyes snapped open and I was staring at the ceiling of my dorm room.

“Turn that off,” Miranda grumbled, throwing a pillow at the alarm clock beside my bed. We had freshman orientation in an hour. I reached over and pressed snooze. Bits of a dream flitted through my memory. I wanted to remember it. Something about it had excited me. But I couldn’t. Sitting on the edge of my bed I thought hard about the moment before my alarm clock had gone off. There was something I wanted to remember but I couldn’t recall it. I was drawing a blank.

Frustrated, I threw the covers off and stood up. Miranda had huddled down deeper in her covers. I had no idea what time she’d finally gotten home last night. She was almost impossible to wake up when she’d had sufficient sleep. This morning was going to be difficult. I decided I’d get a shower first then I’d try to get her to wake up. Orientation was required. She’d have to get up and get there even if she only had enough time to brush her teeth and put on wrinkled clothes.

Gee was standing in front of the mirror. She wasn’t looking in it. Her back was turned to it and she was leaning against the counter with her arms crossed in front of her like she’d was waiting on someone. Her hair was already styled---well as much as she styled it, and she was dressed. She’d been out later than me. How did she look so awake?

“Sleeping in Peggy Ann?” She asked not moving from her spot in front of the sink. I really needed to get a shower, but I wasn’t one to strip down in front of other people.

“Yeah, I can’t believe you’re so awake. But since you are up and dressed, could you get out so I could do the same?”

Gee pushed off from her stance against the counter. “Snippy, snippy. I guess you don’t want to hear about the private invite you got to attend Cold Soul’s concert Friday night either.”

I watched as Gee started walking toward the door to leave me alone like I’d asked. I shouldn’t ask her about the concert. I didn’t date musicians. It was a bad idea.

“Wait. What do you mean? Did Dank invite me?” I was weak. The guy was hard to resist.

Gee halted in her steps and grinned. “Yeah. He did. You even get to bring your friend along if you want to. Backstage passes and all.”

Backstage. That meant he wanted to see me. Didn’t it? I didn’t need to entertain these thoughts but he made it so hard to remember that he was a bad boy. He didn’t act like one. He seemed almost lonely or lost. Not like the wild playboy I’d decided he was from day one.

“Okay. I want to go. I’m sure Miranda will want to go too.” I wanted to ask her why he hadn’t called me himself or if I could have his number but he hadn’t supplied that and maybe I shouldn’t ask.

“I’ll let him know. But then again, you may see him first,” Gee replied then opened the door and closed it behind her before I could ask her what she meant.

Dank

I had been waiting for her since I’d left her bedroom this morning. Last night had been the first time I’d gone into Pagan’s dreams. It felt like an invasion of privacy that I’d never wanted to cross. But while I sat there watching her sleep and making sure she was safe she’d started to have a bad dream. It had taken me a few moments to decide whether or not I should go into her dream and ease her fears or physically hold her like I used to when she was having a nightmare. I decided that the safer way was in her dreams.

The moment her alarm had gone off I left. She’d be arriving at this building soon. I stepped around the tree I’d been leaning against and made myself visible. College girls liked lead singers. I had to dodge overly-aggressive females when I was on campus.

“Dank Walker? No way. I’d heard you’d been seen on campus but I didn’t believe it. But here you are,” a female had already noticed me. She began scrambling through her book bag. “I have a sharpie in here somewhere. Could you autograph my bag or my shirt, oh better yet---my bra?,” she said as she pulled a sharpie from her book bag.

The girl had started lifting her shirt up before it dawned on me that she was serious about the bra.

“No. I don’t sign bras,” I held the sharpie she’d handed me and moved my attention from her to the students approaching the building. My eyes locked with Pagan’s. Shit. She saw that the girl’s damn shirt had been up. I shoved the sharpie back in her direction without breaking eye contact with Pagan and stepped around her. “I gotta go,” was the only explanation I gave her.

Pagan turned her head and stared straight ahead and hurried toward the building. I wasn’t going to let her get inside without talking to me.

Talk to me Pagan. Please.

She halted. Talking in her head was unfair but I hated not being able to show her who I was. I wanted her to see me. I wanted her to love me anyway.

“Good morning, Pagan,” I said as I stopped beside her. She tilted her head to the side and peered up at me. The startled, confused look in her eyes made me feel guilty. I shouldn’t have spoken to her that way. She wasn’t ready.

“Dank?” Her voice sounded as if she were asking a question.

I reached for her book bag, and in her still confused state she let me take it. Slinging it over my shoulder I nodded toward the entrance to the building that Pagan’s calculus class would be in for the next semester. “Better hurry or you’ll be late.”

She shook her head then her eyes zoned in on the book bag now over my shoulder. A small frown puckered her brow. “What are you doing?” she asked.

“Taking your books inside. It looked heavy,” I started walking before she could decide she wanted her book bag back. I was carrying it inside. I wanted every male in the vicinity to see me carrying her bag. I already had to deal with the soul mate. I didn’t want to be forced to see her with anyone else. I was staking my claim.

“Oh. Well, yeah. We got a lot of info at freshman orientation, then I had to go to the bookstore and pick up some books I didn’t have. This is the only class I have today. Apparently this professor is anal and doesn’t want to miss one day of class.”

I loved hearing her talk. When we got to the door I opened it and stepped back so that she could walk in. She glanced back toward the tree where I’d been standing when she walked up and then back at me. “I saw you with a girl and she was taking off her clothes for you? Did she change her mind and decide that stripping in public was a bad idea?”

The cute teasing note to her voice made me smile. “She wanted me to sign her bra. I told her I don’t sign bras; then I saw you and handed her back her marker so I could catch up with you before you got away.”

“Oh,” she replied and stopped at the door marked 312. “And why don’t you sign bras?”

Was Pagan flirting with me? Damn, that mischievous twinkle in her eyes drives me a little crazy. I closed the distance between us and bent my head down until my mouth was right beside her ear. “There’s only one bra I’d like to sign.” Pagan’s breathing hitched and I smiled to myself before standing back up. I wanted a taste. It had been too long since I’d had a taste of her mouth…of her skin.

I stepped inside the classroom desperate to get hold of myself. Inhaling her scent had made my senses go on high alert. Pagan stepped inside while I held the door for her. The jeans she wore cupped her ass like a second skin. It was impossible not to watch as she walked across the room. Jerking my gaze from her, I scanned the other students to see who else was watching her. I didn’t want them looking.