“Thanks, Ma.” Braden didn’t hesitate. He went straight for his jacket and boots, hoping his mom was right. Hoping he’d do the right thing, and that Wes would give him some kind of sign as to when to do it.
***
Wes watched as Braden and Jock traipsed up the hill with Jessie for the hundredth time. They’d been taking turns ever since Braden came out a little while before. Just like Wes did, he struggled to carry her in her ten pounds of snow gear, plus the sled up the hill; only Braden had Jock trying to play with him, too.
He watched as Braden tripped, managing to catch himself before he went down. Wes laughed. “Need some help up there?” he called.
“Shut up!”
Wes laughed again. “I’ll help if you ask real nicely.”
“Shut up!” Braden called down again as he heard Jessie scolding him because “shut up” wasn’t nice.
Wes couldn’t take his eyes off the back of them. Jessie in her pink and green gear. Jock jumping on them. Braden in his dark blue jacket with a matching beanie on his head. His mind went back to the paints, the gift Braden had given him that no one else would have. How he came to them any time they needed him. Seeing him with Jessie. The feel of his hands on Wes.
He didn’t want it to stop. None of it. He wanted more, and it was scary as fuck because he knew how temporary things were. Nothing in his life had ever really stuck, but he wanted Braden to.
Wes wasn’t stupid. He knew he had been partially to blame, maybe more so with Alexander. He struggled opening himself up. He didn’t give himself to Alexander the way he should have...but Alexander hadn’t been willing to fight for him, either. He’d easily been able to walk away. Christ, he hoped Braden wouldn’t walk away. That he wouldn’t disappoint the man.
Wes started going up the hill toward Braden and Jessie. They weren’t too far ahead of him, Braden dragging because of the weight he carried. As though he knew Wes made his way toward them, he stopped and turned. His face was red because of the cold, but he smiled that happy fucking smile that only Braden gave, and he realized he would risk anything for it. For the first time, he would really risk anything.
“About time, Wesley,” he said to Wes when he reached them. It was as though he knew what Wes had been thinking—as though he meant more than just Wes climbing up the hill.
“I’m here now.”
“That’s all that matters.” He handed Jessie to him as the little girl wrapped her arms around his neck.
“Thank you,” Wes told him but Braden just shook his head.
“You don’t have anything to thank me for.”
But he really did. “Come on. Let’s get to the top.”
The three of them, plus Jock, finished climbing up the hill. When they got to the top, Braden sat on the sled with Jessie between his legs and his arms around her. Then he scooted forward with them. “Get on here.”
This is where Wes would usually second guess himself, but hell, he wanted to be like Braden—no hesitation at all. So he did. He climbed on behind Braden. They pushed off, Jessie cheering as they raced down the hill. Jock ran beside them, kicking up snow as they went.
They did it three more times, and on the fourth, when they made it to the bottom of the hill, the sled hit something and they all rolled off. Braden held Jessie again, Wes having held her the time before.
As soon as he hit the ground, he jerked into a sitting position, his heart hammering. “Jess, you okay?”
She lay on top of Braden and started laughing. “Hey. Not funny, Squirt.” But he was laughing too. Then Wes fell onto his back, looking up at the sky, joining them.
“Let’s do it again!” Jessie squealed.
“No,” he and Braden both said at the same time, and he wondered, wondered if Chelle saw them right now, and hoped she thought they were doing a good job with Jessie. If he was doing a good job with himself.
Chapter Twenty-Six
They’d just finished Christmas dinner when Wes grabbed Braden’s arm as he walked down the hall toward the bathroom.
“You’re limping. What happened?” Wes asked him.
“Nothing. Fucked up my ankle a little that last time down the hill. It’s no biggie.”
Wes cocked his head a little, opened his mouth as though he was going to say something, but then kissed him instead. It took Braden a second to open his mouth, to let his tongue wrestle with Wes’s, because he hadn’t expected it. They were alone in the hallway, but still, Wes didn’t usually do shit like this. He definitely didn’t kiss Braden when anyone could walk by and see them. That made things more serious than Wes wanted them.