“Ford?” she says in an overly sweet voice.
“Yes, Ashleigh?” I look over at her with a dimpled grin.
“I’m gonna get you back for all this control, you do realize that, right?”
I reach over and grab her thigh. She jumps a little and lets out a gasp. “I never lose, Ash. Never. So if you think you can get me back by playing nasty with me tonight, then by all means, show me what a loser I am.” And then I slip my hand down her thigh and pinch her skin until she yelps. Before her hand can even move to swat mine off, I’m caressing her pu**y through her jeans. “Do not come or I will tease you and withhold orgasms later.”
She holds her breath and nods.
I let up on the pressure. “Unbutton and unzip your pants.”
She breathes. But she obeys. She pops the button and the zipper makes a soft ripping sound.
“Stick your hand inside your panties.”
She doesn’t even hesitate and this makes me so f**king hard. I can feel her fingers through her jeans. “I can feel everything you do, Ashleigh. I’ll let you come right now, but you have to do all the work. Are you ready?”
“I’m ready,” she whispers. When I look over at her she’s looking right back at me. Her stare never wavers.
I look back to the road. This highway is deserted. No one is traveling I-70 west with us. There are cars every now and then going east, but very few.
“Begin,” I command.
She shudders before she even starts and I almost die thinking she already came. But it was just an excited shudder, not an orgasm. She begins in slow circles over her clit. I press down a little and her breathing becomes heavier. She continues this a few more times but then she scoots her butt down more towards the edge of the seat and slips in farther. I can feel the back of her hand on my palm through the thick fabric, and then it dips. “Tell me what you just did, Ash.”
“Put my fingers inside me,” she says in a low, breathy voice.
“Does it feel good?”
“Not as good as yours would. But I’ll make do.”
I say nothing to her joking, just cup her hand with mine and increase her movements. Her other hand hovers over mine. “Can I touch you, Ford?”
“Yes,” I say, because I want her. I want her more than I don’t want to be touched. Her hand rests on top of mine. It’s very small, and I chance a look over to compare sizes. “Keep on task.”
She pumps into herself and then she takes my hand and places it over her belly, where the opening in her jeans is. “I want you to touch my skin.”
“You’ll get your wish,” I tell her with my eyes still on the road. “But for now—” I withdraw my hand and put it back on the steering wheel. “For now, you will pleasure yourself to satisfy me.”
“I’m going to imagine you doing it, then.”
“That’s against the rules, you should be thinking only of how much you will please me by following my instructions.”
“I don’t care, it’s my mind and I’ll picture you fingering me if I want.” And then she opens her eyes all the way and stares at me. I look away and concentrate on the road. “And you will never know, Ford. Because you’re not a mind-reader.”
I want to thump my head against the steering wheel repeatedly, that’s how crazy she’s driving me with this rebellion. That’s how bad she’s being. If she was one of my pets I’d have her strapped face first to a wall, gagged and blindfolded right now—she’d be getting the spanking of her life. And I wouldn’t feel bad about it at all. I’d enjoy it.
But she’s not a pet. She’s Ashleigh. And she’s a little more like Rook than I previously thought. She wants to be loved, not punished, commanded, or manipulated. Just loved.
Maybe that’s why Rook rejected me? Ronin just loves her, no questions asked. He just accepts her. Lets her make mistakes, always careful to watch and make sure she doesn’t get hurt. Protecting her from a distance if necessary. Close by, but unseen at times. That’s what Rook was trying to tell me back in the stadium that day when she was describing how different we were. How we treat her differently. If she stayed with me, I’d make her do things she’d rather not, just because she’s been trained to please. Just because I can.
I’d ruin her drive to be herself.
I don’t want to ruin Rook. And I don’t want to ruin Ashleigh, either. I like her the way she is, I want her to be herself. Small and vulnerable, yet brave and willing. Caring and honest, yet suspicious and hopeless. I’ve laughed more times with Ashleigh than I have in years. I like that she can do this, that being herself is so damn desirable to me.
But I want to be myself, as well. I want her to find me desirable the way I am.
The moaning interrupts my internal thoughts and then Ash buckles her back against the seat and releases a long breath. “I can’t wait to get to Vegas,” she says as she rests against the headrest, her eyes closed. “I hope I can satisfy you, Ford. I really do want to please you but I have this recessive wild side that I can’t control. It just pops into existence every now and then.”
“Ashleigh.” I wait for her to open her eyes and look over at me. “You’re perfect. I like the way you are. Don’t change for me.”
She puts the seat back and curls herself up in a little ball facing me. Like she’s a little cat getting ready to nap. “But what about the spankings?”