Josiah had turned into a favor that Mateo owed someone, an obligation. He secretly feared really being an obligation to Mateo. He knew Mateo loved him, but having Josiah around made things more difficult. Teo had everything harder. He knew that, and he hated it.
“I know. I’m sorry.” He laid his head on Teo’s shoulder. “Why can’t we run? Just get a bus ticket and go?”
Mateo sighed. “We will, but I have to be smart about it. Javier’s watchin’ me. I gave him a bullshit excuse for not comin’ back, but who knows if he believes me. He’s testing me, Jay. And...” he shrugged. “Now I owe him. He took care of the body for me.”
A rival gang, Javier had told Mateo. Enemies of his dad who had somehow found out Mateo was in the city. Word traveled, which was how Javier heard Teo was back, too, but he hadn’t made it to Mateo in time.
“I hate being here. Hate having you here. But he’s protection, and I’m makin’ money, both of which we need right now.”
Josiah pulled back. “If you don’t kill yourself from puking up your insides every day or end up in prison. I don’t want you to do this for me. I don’t care about the other guy who attacked me.”
Mateo groaned, frustration obvious in the way his jaw tightened. He grabbed Josiah’s hand, ran his thumb over the nails that Josiah chewed so much they bled.
“You gotta stop doin’ that. No one’s gonna hurt me, and I’m not going to prison. Not when I have you here waiting for me.”
The tension didn’t leave the room as Josiah wrapped his arms around Mateo. It was there all the time now. They were both always on edge, always fighting.
“You up for another lesson?” Mateo asked him. He was determined that Josiah learn to fight now. He’d bought him a knife, and taught him how to shoot a gun. Josiah hated guns. Wanted nothing to do with them, but he did it for Mateo; and because he didn’t want to be helpless again. For Mateo to always have to come to his rescue.
“No.” He shook his head. Heat zipped through him. He needed to find that piece of them they’d lost recently. “I want to be with you. I just want you, Teo.”
They hadn’t had sex at all since he was attacked. Mateo refused to, and automatically shook his head now. “No. It’s too soon.”
This time Josiah wouldn’t take no for an answer. He pulled Mateo toward the bedroom. “Please, Teo. I need to feel close to you. Need you to take the bad memories away.”
With that, he didn’t have to pull anymore. Mateo just went with him. They lay on the bed and took off each other’s clothes. He kissed Josiah so perfect. Tasted his skin everywhere. When Josiah tried to reach for him, Mateo shook him off. He grabbed Josiah’s erection, taking it deeply into his mouth.
“Teo...” he whispered.
Mateo went from there to his balls, licking and sucking on those, too, before spreading Josiah’s legs wide.
“I love having my mouth on you. Love it so fucking much.”
Chills raced through him when Mateo’s tongue traced his hole, only to quickly be replaced by heat.
“More.”
Mateo gave him more, lashing his tongue over the most intimate part of Josiah’s body.
“I want you inside me.”
“Yes...” He moaned when a finger pushed into him before Teo’s mouth covered his erection again. His finger pumped in and out as he sucked Josiah.
“More. I want you inside me, Teo.”
“I want that, too, Jay. Would live inside you if I could.”
He grabbed a condom, ripping it open and rolling it down his shaft.
“I don’t have any lube, Jay. Fuck, I didn’t even think of that.”
Josiah pulled him down so their lips met again. He took the kiss deep, his body moving against Josiah’s, sending shockwaves of pleasure though him.
“Fuck, I gotta be inside you.” He spit on his hand, rubbing it on his erection, and then did the same thing to Josiah’s entrance.
When he pushed inside, everything felt okay again. They’d make it out of this. They had to.
Their bodies found a familiar rhythm together. Josiah stroked his own cock as Mateo pumped in and out of him.
The orgasm slammed into him, semen pooling on his belly. Mateo groaned above him, going rigid as he came, too.
With little rests in between, they made love twice before crawling under the blankets, his body tucked against Mateo’s.
“We’re gonna get out of here. You’re right. We should just go.”
Josiah looked up at him, his heart running wild. “Really?”