I crooked my head around, making sure the door was closed to the busy gym. Then Talia picked up on my silence.
“What’s happened?” she asked, a hint of excitement entering her voice. “I know that pause of silence by now, Kisa!”
Taking a deep breath, I blurted, “I saw him, again, last night.”
“Kisa!” Talia reprimanded. “You didn’t! If Alik finds out… fuck, he’ll go crazy!”
I squeezed my eyes in panic and blurted, “And I gave him ten grand…”
I was positive a tumbleweed rolled through the office during Talia’s silence on the other side of our conversation.
“Talia?” I called, unsure if she’d hung up.
“Kisa… what the hell’s going on?”
“He saved my life. And he told me he needed ten grand. It’s nothing to us, Talia. You know that. So I gave him the cash.”
“You just gave it? No questions?” Talia asked, incredulous. “It was probably for drugs!” she proclaimed.
A chill ran through my body, balking at her attitude. “No—”
“No? You mean you know what he wanted it for?” she interjected.
“He said it was for…” I swallowed, knowing how damn dark it would sound.
“What?” she pushed.
I took a deep breath and said, “Revenge…” I let that word hang in the air. Even at a distance, I could feel Talia’s worry, her concern for my safety and possibly my sanity.
“Revenge?” she said quietly. “On who, for fuck’s sake?”
“I don’t know,” I whispered, feeling foolish. “But I…”
“But you what?”
“I believed him. I felt he needed it. There is just something about the guy that called to me. I can’t explain it. I feel… drawn to him…”
“Kisa! What is it with you and this guy? You’re acting insane!”
How could I explain? How can anyone ever explain the inexplicable?
The image of the hood pulling back and the reveal of his eyes had replayed endlessly through my mind. My mouth opened to tell Talia that he had the same eyes as…
But I stopped myself. I couldn’t talk about Talia’s dead brother. I couldn’t tell her this man had the same eyes… eyes that matched mine. I’d even looked up the condition early this morning when I couldn’t sleep—Heterochromia. It was a common eye condition. But his eyes were the exact color of Luka’s, the placement of the condition, that smudge of my blue on the upper left iris…
Christ! Maybe I was going insane! The pressures of living this life causing me to breakdown.
“Kisa?” Talia’s voice was lighter now. “Is this about marrying Alik? Are you acting this way because the plans are starting to turn into reality? Are you sure you want this?”
A nervous laugh bubbled up my throat as Talia trailed off, and strangely, tears sprang to my eyes. “I have no choice, Talia. You know it’s true. It’s the perfect marriage, one my father and all the Bratva are making sure happens. It’s just…”
“What?” Talia asked.
A salty teardrop trickled down my cheek. I wiped it away, chastising myself. “I always dreamed I’d marry…”
“Luka,” Talia responded in sympathy.
“I know. I’m stupid. I’m twenty-five and acting like a child.”
“No,” Talia said softly, “you simply have a broken heart. Sometimes they never heal. But…”
I sucked on my bottom lip to stop from sobbing out loud. “What?” I whispered.
“Sometimes when a heart breaks, it starts to let in the light.”
“Tal.” I cried quietly, this time allowing my tears to flow.
“Look, Kisa, I know how you felt about my brother.” She hiccupped a sob and added, “And he loved you too. It was like you were only in each other’s world. No one else existed. It was strange for being so young.”
My heart plummeted again.
“But I have to let it go. I have to marry Alik. That’s what you’re saying, right?”
“No! I mean, yes. I mean…” Talia cleared her throat. “You’ve got to move on, for your own happiness, but it’s no secret I don’t like Alik. He’s way too possessive of you, Kisa. He… he scares me. I’m afraid, for you.”
My body tensed, feeling the urge to defend Alik, to protect him. “But he needs me, Tal. He wouldn’t cope if he didn’t have me. Imagine what he’d be capable of if I wasn’t around to calm him down.”