A sense if familiarity filled me. These were Bratva men. These were men that shouldn’t be fucked with. This was my family… this was where I belonged.
My father walked to Abram, Kirill followed behind. Abram was still staring at his son dead on the floor. My father took off his coat, wearing a black suit underneath, and in one strike, backhanded Abram across the face. Abram looked like he didn’t even notice it.
Kirill and my father lifted their guns. No words were spoken. And after a few tense seconds they both fired shots into Abram’s chest and he slumped to the ground next to his dead son.
Kisa wrapped herself in my arms and I kissed her head, gripping her tight.
My father came toward me and asked, “Luka? Do you remember your mama?”
My heart beat wildly and my muscles tensed, but now that the key to my past was opened, a dark-haired woman’s face came into view and I exhaled like I’d just ran for hours.
Kisa squeezed my waist and lifted her head. “She’ll be so happy. She never gave up the belief that you were innocent. She knew you couldn’t have done it. She always believed in your innocence.”
Nerves suddenly racked my body and I leaned down and pressed my forehead against Kisa’s. “But I’m not the Luka she knew. I’m a monster, a murderer. This version of her son isn’t innocent.”
“You are our Luka. You are our son,” my father said sternly from beside me.
“Kisa, we need to get you home so Dr. Chazov can see you,” Kirill said moving behind Kisa. “You need a cast on that wrist. You need stitches, and medication.”
Kisa reluctantly nodded and put her hand in my cheek. I hadn’t noticed how pale she was, how in pain. “You’ll be fine, Luka. I’ll come straight to your parent’s house afterward. You need to see a doctor too. You’re hurt, bleeding.”
“No,” I said aggressively. “I go with you. I see your doctor.”
“Luka—”
“No! Kisa, solnyshko. I go with you,” I bent down to whisper at her ear, “I need you with me. I only feel at home with you. I don’t… I don’t know these people like I know you. You’re my now, they’re still my past.” I stared at her helplessly. “I can’t be without you. I need you.” I swallowed and fought to breathe, as I admitted, “I have fear in my heart… I am fearful of all of this.”Kisa’s eyes saddened and I knew everyone around us had heard me. Kisa took my hand and turned to my father and Talia while I kept my head low.
“I’ll go see the doctor with Luka, then we’ll come to you. You’ll have time to prepare mama Tolstoi.”
I kept my eyes lowered like a coward. But I’d felt more in the last five minutes than I had in my whole life and it was too much.
A hand placed on my bicep and I looked up to see my father. “It’s okay, Luka. Go with Kisa. Get fixed up. We’ll see you soon… son.”
I nodded, feeling that word settle in my heart and wrapped my hand over Kisa’a shoulders, leading her from the cage. In the holding room, we didn’t speak, but I could feel her watching me. I threw on my old familiar gray sweatshirt, the one I’d worn since the Gulag and followed Kisa to a back door. Keeping close to the other half of my heart and, for the first time ever, keeping my hood pulled back.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Kisa
“Are you ready, lyubov moya?”
I turned to Luka, and he was stock still, staring at his mama and papa’s brownstone with an anxious look on his face.
I squeezed his hand and Luka finally looked down at me. He blinked, then blinked again. A completely lost look covered his face.
“I don’t know,” he answered in a husky voice. “I’m remembering so much, but none of it is making sense. I just get flashbacks of broken memories. None of them are in order. Just glimpses of what my life used to be like.”
He pointed to the brownstone that was as much a home to me as it was him. “Like this house. I remember sitting on these steps with you. I remember being in my bedroom, I think… with you.” Luka moved to stand in front of me and lifted my hand, the one free of a cast, and pressed it to his chest. “Every memory I seem to have has you in it.” His head was down, unable to meet my eyes.
A lump clogged my throat at how scared and lost he seemed right now. He had only a few hours ago killed the man that ruined his life. I think that goal drove him for so long that now without it, he had no idea what to do next.
The rabid killer of the cage was gone, a lost boy taking his place.