And then he was gone. He rolled off of Ben but didn’t leave the bed. Ben pulled the blindfold off and tossed it to the floor. He had to confirm what he already knew. “You weren’t going to take me.”
“No.”
Ben didn’t ask why. He didn’t want the answer.
“You would forgive them if they asked. You helped me when you didn’t want to. When you’d get nothing from it. You could have gotten ass anywhere. You might not see that, Dante, but I do.”
He might not be able to give Dante much but Ben had to at least give him that truth.
Ben stood, ready to leave. He made it to the bedroom door before Dante’s voice stopped him. “Don’t go.”
Go, get the fuck out of here. You’re getting too close.
He walked back into the room and climbed into the bed. Dante pulled the condom off and tossed it into the trash, before grabbing Ben and pulling him close. It was still the middle of the day, yet Ben was exhausted.
He let his hand rest between Dante’s legs, just wanting to touch him. Getting the remnants of their sex on his hand and not caring.
“What is it about you?” Dante asked.
Ben didn’t answer. He didn’t know. Just like he didn’t know what it was about Dante either.
“I don’t want to fuck up the way I did with him. I don’t want to fuck you up the way I screwed Abel up even more than he already was.”
Was that why he didn’t want to have sex with Ben today? That didn’t make sense.
“You make me want to lose it—the blindfold. You make me want to see you. Hell, sometimes I think I already do, regardless.”
There was nothing to think about. “I see you too,” was all Ben said. Because he did. He saw Dante, the same way Dante saw him.
CHAPTER FORTY-ONE
Ben was in his apartment a few days later when his phone rang. He considered not answering his mother’s call but eventually did.
“I see you’re over the broken heart again. It’s incredible how easily it heals when it comes to Dad. Not me though. Or Bonnie either.”
“Benjamin, I didn’t call to argue with you.”
No, of course not. “What do you need? That’s when you call, right? When he hurts you, I screw up, or he wants me to do something for him. Which is it?”
His mom sighed. “We’re having a party in a few days. It’s for a good cause, Ben. Your father really wants to do his part, especially after what happened with you. It’s important that we work toward cleaning up the city, all the violence. It’s to help violence against women as well. It would be nice if you could show your support there.”
“It would look good for him? Is that what you mean?” That’s what it was always about. His dad didn’t care about violence or women’s rights and safety unless it helped him get where he wanted to go. “What does he have planned? How does this help his political career?”
“That’s not fair. He’s your father. He’s doing a good thing.”
“He’s doing it for himself!” There wasn’t a doubt in Ben’s mind about that.
“Please, just go. It’s for your family. “
Family? “He should have stuck up for Bonnie this way before she died. Only he pushed her problems under the rug instead. She was an embarrassment to him.”
The same way Ben was. Or the way he would be if he didn’t hide their dirty laundry for his father the same way his mother did.
“Ben.”
“I’ll go.” He hung up the phone. He didn’t need to know the details.
Ben made a few phone calls and then ate lunch. Afterward, he picked up his cell again, this time calling Dante.
“I’m not getting much work done since I met you,” Dante said instead of hello.
“You’re welcome.”
“Funny. Not all of us have the same means as you do.”
Ben didn’t give a shit about the money. Not really. He didn’t take any from his father. What he had, he’d earned himself. Still, he had more than most. “Shit. I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking. Do I need to let you go?”
Dante chuckled. “No. I can work later.”
“If I didn’t know better, I would think you wanted to talk to me,” Ben teased. It was always such fragile ground between them. They admitted things, and then pulled back. It was the first time in his life he felt insecure with someone, the first time he didn’t know how to act.
“And?”
Well shit. Ben didn’t expect him to admit it. He wasn’t even sure Dante felt it, but then, that was a lie. “Yeah...me too. Does that mean you’ll go with me to a party my mother asked me to attend?”