‘Hello, Gracie,’ I say.
‘Miller.’ She smiles, sitting herself at the table. ‘Hi, Mum.’
‘Hello, darling. Would you like cake?’
‘God, no! My hips are suffering because of your cake.’
‘Your hips are just fine.’ William strides in, giving the back of Gracie’s head a distasteful look.
‘What do you know?’ she retorts.
‘Everything,’ he fires back confidently, making me smile and Gracie scoff. William gives a nod in greeting to everyone, then makes a huge fuss over Harry, waving a Harrods bag under his nose. ‘Look what I’ve got,’ he teases. ‘Mummy called me and said you got a head teacher’s award last week for being helpful to the other children! Well done, you!’
I chuckle to myself. Yes, that was before he stole all of their socks.
‘I did!’ The excitement in Harry’s eyes spikes my own. I know what’s in that bag. ‘Is it for me?’
‘Yes, for you.’ Gracie pushes the bag away and gives William a warning look that he notes quickly, backing off. ‘But first, tell me how your day was.’
‘Don’t ask!’ Josephine yells, collecting some plates. ‘Odd socks everywhere!’
Gracie sighs and Harry’s little head starts bobbing up and down in agreement. ‘Five today, Nan.’
‘Five?’ Gracie sounds shocked, which is understandable. We’ve had one or two pairs, but five is a record and it’s shaken my poor little boy’s world to the core.
‘Yes, five.’ Harry removes himself from Gracie’s lap and puffs his little chest out in exasperation, but he says no more. He doesn’t need to. Now everyone is here, he wants proof that five isn’t going to increase. George and I stand, joining William, Greg, and Ben, and we all lift our trousers, revealing our socks for inspection. I really don’t need to be in the line-up – my boy knows he can depend on his daddy – but I comply anyway, just for the sake of it. Plus, I adore his concentrating face when he does this.
I feel William peek out of the corner of his eye to me and I chance a glance, although I know I won’t like what I see. He’ll have that tired look on his face.
‘He’s a kid. Humour him,’ I whisper, ignoring William’s sardonic puff of laughter. I know what he’s thinking. He’s thinking that this little quirk has nothing to do with him being a kid and everything to do with him being my kid. ‘It’s just the socks,’ I assure him.
My little man walks slowly down the line, pursing his lips, like he’s bracing himself for the worst. I know for sure William, Greg, Ben, and I will never let him down, but old George is always a loose cannon. ‘Nice choice, George!’ Harry sings, dropping to his knees to get a closer look.
I can virtually hear George’s chest pumping up with pride. ‘Thank you, Harry. Nana Josephine treated me.’
The relief that swoops through me is palpable, and I can sense William’s, too. We both look down to George’s ankles. He has on a pair of thick navy woollen things. They’re vile, but a matching pair so they pass. I look over to Josephine, finding her smiling proudly, and mentally thank her and her forceful ways with the old boy, because the exposure of George’s aged feet is not a pleasurable sight when Harry makes him remove his socks. I shudder.
‘Nice?’ William asks under his breath, nudging me with his elbow. ‘We have silk and George’s monstrosities get all the praise?’
I chuckle and drop my trousers, now the examination is over, watching as Harry jumps up to his granddad. ‘Can I have my present now, Pap?’
William looks to Gracie for permission, who nods her consent. He steps forward and takes a seat, placing Harry next to him. He immediately tries to snatch the bag from William.
‘Hey!’ he scolds, pulling it away and giving Harry warning eyes. ‘Where have those manners gone?’
‘Sorry, Pappy.’ Harry’s tail goes right between his legs.
‘Better. You know, there’s only one man in this world who I’ll allow Nanny to love more than me.’
‘Me,’ Harry states without delay. ‘But you really don’t have a choice in the matter.’
I can’t help it. I burst into fits of laughter, much to William’s disgust, holding my stomach and wiping at my instantly wet eyes. ‘I’m sorry,’ I laugh, knowing I need to rein it in before he swings at me.
‘It freaks me out, I swear,’ William grumbles, shaking his head in despair and dodging Gracie’s hand when it flies out to smack his shoulder.
‘Hey!’
‘Well, c’mon!’ he argues, clucking Harry’s cheek affectionately. ‘How is it possible?’
‘He’s perfect,’ I jump in, wiping the crumbs polluting Harry’s fingers away with a wet cloth.
‘Thank you, Daddy.’
‘Most welcome.’ I want to scoop him up and squeeze him in my thing, but I resist. ‘We need to get going.’
‘Let me open this,’ he says, rummaging through the gift bag and pulling out what we all know is in there. ‘Look!’
His excitement over a pair of socks is way past unreasonable. I know that, yet I’ll never find the rationale to remedy it. ‘Wow!’ I join him in his excitement and take the pair when they’re thrust at me. ‘Very smart.’
‘They have horses on them!’ He snatches them back and holds them to his chest. ‘They match my shirt! Ooooh, this is just too cool!’
I’m beaming. Gracie is beaming. Every damn person in this room is beaming. Don’t anyone ever tell me that my boy isn’t fucking perfect.