I take down a sheet and read it over.
Wait.
Red ribbon?
* * *
It was Christmastime, my freshman year. My whole family was at Alex Lind’s house for their annual holiday party. Since we’d moved to the island full-time, Alex’s mom and my mom had gotten to be pretty good friends. They went to lunch together, shopping off island, that kind of thing.
The parents were downstairs drinking and talking and mingling by the fireplace. Elvis Presley was playing on the stereo, and us kids could hear it upstairs in Alex’s room. This was before he moved into the pool house. He used to have the whole third floor to himself. It was basically one big rec room, with beanbag chairs and a foosball table and a dartboard. For the party Alex’s mom had set up a table of kid food, things like chicken fingers and popcorn shrimp and mini pizzas, probably so we wouldn’t come downstairs and bother them.
The little kids, my sister included, were fighting over who got to play darts next. Nadia nearly got into a scuffle with an eight-year-old boy, a cousin of Alex’s, I think, and I had to break it up. Since Alex and I were the oldest, we were in charge. I hadn’t even wanted to come, since Rennie wasn’t going to be there, but my mom had insisted we go as a family.
Alex put in a DVD for the kids, and they quieted down for the most part. I was sitting at Alex’s desk, doing stuff on his computer and eating a Christmas cookie. It was a reindeer with a Red Hot candy for a nose. Alex was lying in his hammock a few feet away, strumming on a guitar. He wasn’t too bad at it. Out of nowhere he said, “Hey, cool headband.”
I looked up, startled. “Oh, thanks,” I said, touching the crown of my head. “It’s actually a ribbon.” My mom had wanted me to wear a dress, but I would have felt dumb showing up at Alex Lind’s house dressed up. So I wore a kelly green sweater and a tartan skirt, plus the red ribbon, for a festive touch.
“Cool,” he said, looking back down at his guitar. “You look nice in red. Like, uh, that shirt you wear sometimes.”
“What shirt?”
“I don’t remember.” His freckly face turned the same color as his hair. He kept strumming the guitar. “I think you had it on last Monday or something?”
The only red I wore on Monday was during gym. “That was my PE uniform from my old school,” I told Alex.
“Nice,” he said. Now his face was as red as my ribbon. “Yeah, we don’t wear uniforms here.”
“Yeah, I know,” I said.
It was awkward for another second or two. Then Alex got up and went to the bathroom and I went back to the computer.
* * *
Oh my God.
That Christmas party was freshman year. He remembered? All this time? That can’t be.
I look at him, and he’s looking at me. He drops his eyes right away. So it is about me.
Next to me Ashlin covers her mouth with her hand. “Oh, my gosh,” she says, giggling. “I had no idea Alex was a poet!”
I feel dizzy.
“Who did this?” Alex demands. He’s all flushed; he’s definitely upset.
Reeve is practically falling on the ground, he’s laughing so hard. “Bro, this is that song you’ve been working on, isn’t it? Come on. Don’t be ashamed. This is good stuff. You’ve got talent.”
“Shut up, Reeve.” We watch as Alex starts taking down the posters. I wonder how Kat managed to get them up so high.
“Alex, man, can we Eskimo kiss all night long?” Reeve asks, sputtering into laughter again and throwing an arm around him.
Alex shoves him away. “Did you do this?”
Shaking his head, Reeve says, “No way! I swear on your red ribbon!”
Alex tears the rest of the posters down and stalks off in a huff, throwing them into the garbage on the way.
Reeve starts singing the poem, and everyone’s laughing. I walk up to him and snatch the poster out of his hand. “You’re such a jerk,” I say loudly. To Ashlin I say, “Let’s go back to class.”
Ashlin and I are walking away as Reeve calls out to me, “You need to work on your sense of humor, Cho.”
I don’t turn around. I just keep walking. Ashlin’s talking about Alex’s poem or song or whatever it is, but I’m barely even paying attention. I can’t stop thinking about the look on Alex’s face when our eyes met. Does he really like me that much? But if that’s true, what is he doing with my sister? It just doesn’t make sense.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
MARY
I FEEL LIKE I’M A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT GIRL. WHEN I see Reeve in the hallway, I don’t go out of my way to avoid him. I just walk right by with my head held high, because I don’t care if he notices me or not. Even if he did suddenly recognize me the way I wanted him to that first day of school, make a big deal over how different I look now, it wouldn’t make any difference. Even if he apologized, he’s still going to get his. The wheels are already in motion.
I’ve held myself back for way too long. I’m not going to do that anymore. So when I walk down the hallway, I make sure to smile at the people I don’t know. In bio class, when James Turnshek turns the Bunsen burner up too high and makes the beaker shatter, I laugh along with everyone else. I don’t even care that we’ll have to start over on the lab.
Near the end of the day, I pass Lillia in the hallway. I’m on my way to math, and she’s at the water fountain, holding her long black hair back with one hand, leaning into the stream of water. I would keep walking, but she does something when she sees me looking at her. She makes her eyes go real big, double the size they usually are, and jerks her head just slightly, like she wants me to walk over.
I try not to be too obvious when I stop and double back. Hugging my books to my chest, I meander over and pretend to look at some student council announcement taped up to the wall.
As soon as I’m next to her, Lillia lets go of her hair. It falls and covers her face, and a few of the ends get wet in the basin of the water fountain. I guess she does it so no one can see her talking to me. She whispers, “Meet after school at the pool, okay, Mary?” in a voice so quiet, I have to strain to hear it.
I nod, and then we head off in opposite directions.
* * *
The swimming pool is in a separate building, and right now it’s closed for repairs. They’re doing work on it for the winter, when swim season begins. The door is wedged open, so I slip inside.