Alex paused at the door to their bedroom, a tray of coffee in his hands. Carmen and Felipa were engrossed in feeding the twins. Carmen was breast feeding Matthew and Felipa was feeding Natalie with a bottle. They were chatting together as if they had known each other all their lives.
He moved on before they were aware of his presence. With every step up to the office where Señor Medena waited, he dreaded the conversation. Sure, they needed to clear the air about the inheritance issue, but that wasn’t enough for Carmen. Right now all he wanted to do was get it over with.
He set the tray down on the table and handed a steaming cup of coffee to Señor Medena. The sooner he started, the sooner it would be out of the way. He cleared his throat.
“Carmen was right . . . about the way I really feel . . . about . . . you.”
Señor Medena watched him for a moment, his expression guarded. Finally he shrugged.
“She has great understanding of us.”
Alex let out a breath of relief. At least that part was out of the way.
“Cream?” He asked, lifting the creamer.
Señor Medena nodded. “Yes, please.”
Alex handed him the cream and sat down in his chair. They sipped their coffee in silence for a few minutes and then Señor Medena spoke.
“Carmen is a good wife.”
Alex eyed him suspiciously. “Excellent.”
“You have a good family. A house without children is not a home.”
Here it came. Alex set his cup on the desk.
“You have your children in your home.”
Señor Medena smiled and nodded. “It is good. I would like small children to be there.” He leaned back in his chair, observing Alex over the rim. “Felipa and Alondra see how it is with Carmen. They would like to have such a life.”
“Not Dulce,” Alex said.
He nodded. “I have talked with Dulce. She does not respect others. I have let her do this, but now I tell her she must be respectful. Still she does not obey. I tell her she must go.”
Alex leaned forward and picked up his mug. “I hope you didn’t do that on my account.”
Señor Medena shook his head and frowned. “I see how it is with your children. You teach them to respect people. I wish it to be so with all who live in my home.”
Alex nodded. “That’s how I was raised.”
Señor Medena smiled. “Mr. Barnett was a good father. I am grateful.”
Alex stared at him. It was probably the last thing he expected to hear, and yet, he knew it was true.
“But you kept trying to take me from them.”
Señor Medena leaned forward, cradling the cup of coffee in both hands. His gaze fixed on Alex.
“You thought you had a son for a little while. How did you feel?”
Alex frowned. “Not like I wanted to take him away from the man who had been a Dad to him.”
Señor Medena nodded. “Father and Dad are two different things to a son.”
He leaned back slowly, as if measuring important words, and carefully set his cup on the desk. Continuing to contemplate the cup, he finally spoke.
“I did not take your Dad away.”
True, he didn’t succeed in gaining custody, but . . . Like a soft-boiled egg being sucked through the neck of a bottle; the meaning of his words sank in and resumed their true shape.
Had he been blaming Señor Medena for the death of his Dad? In spite of the continual struggle for custody, he had felt more welcome at the Medena home than he had with his step-father’s family. When had he shut out those fond memories of rodeos and outings at the Medena hacienda?
Señor Medena was looking at him in a strange way.
“When you hear you have a son, you feel responsible – yes? You want him to have all you can give him.”
Alex stood and turned away from him, staring out the window.
“It’s not the same.”
Of course it was the same. It wasn’t compassion for Tessa that had made him feel so vulnerable. If the boy had been his, how would his good intentions have made her husband feel? If she had stayed with her husband and they had more children, would he have felt financially responsible for the others as well?
He turned from the window and faced Señor Medena.
“That explains how you treated Katie, but what about Felipa and Alondra – and even Dulce? No wonder she resented me.”
Señor Medena shook his head. “I would not have left them out of my will – I could not. They do not want the hacienda. They want what you give Carmen. This is why Dulce argues with you.”
Alex ran a hand through his hair and rubbed the back of his neck. If he lived to be a hundred he’d never understand women. If they wanted what he and Carmen had, why didn’t they go out and find it?
He sighed. “I don’t want the hacienda either. Carmen and I love it here.”
Señor Medena shoved hands into his pockets.
“This make a good horse ranch, yes?”
Alex treated him to a wry smile. “Probably not, but she was born and raised here - and her parents are buried here. This is our home.”
Señor Medena nodded again. “We will see. You may do as you wish.”
That was the end of the conversation. Nothing was truly resolved except possibly the hostility between them. Maybe that was enough. It would probably satisfy Carmen.
At some point their marriage had morphed into a family. It wasn’t simply the addition of children, but the changes those responsibilities had made in them. Carmen had been his soul mate for a long time. Now she gave him insight to Katie and his mother. Carmen thought she wanted him to make the decisions, but she wanted to be involved with the process. Katie had been telling him that for years, but he hadn’t seen it until now. The truth was, Carmen lacked the confidence to make decisions. Her response to the issue about a son was indication that she was ready to break from the past. It was time for him to embrace it.