“Yay,” I answer in my own hushed tone.
“One more thing, baby, and then we can have the best spaghetti in town. Are you ready for that big, huge secret? You can’t tell anyone.”
Her head bobs, each long blonde ringlet dancing against her skin.
“In a few days, I’m going to take your mommy somewhere, somewhere special to us because the last time we were there she took my hand and never let it go. This time, sweetheart, this time I’m hoping that she takes my hand again. The only difference is, when she takes it this time, it means the three of us become a family.”
“That sounds fun, Le—Daddy,” she whispers.
And there goes that sharpness in my chest. Again.
“I have to ask you something first though, Molly. Something that’s a huge secret so you can’t tell your mommy, but I have to ask you because in order to have your mommy give me her hand, I want to know you will too.”
She pats my hand and laughs. “I already gave you my hand, silly.”
I smile and nod. “You sure have, sweetheart. But what I mean is, I’m going to ask your mommy for her hand so that I can give her a ring. A beautiful ring that only queens and princesses get. And if she tells me yes, I get to take her hand and put that big beautiful ring on there. That way everyone knows that your mommy took my hand forever and ever.”
I reach down into my jeans and pull out a bracelet that I had picked up last weekend. It’s a simple silver bracelet with one charm hanging on it. The charm is a single teapot with a base made of three diamonds. One for her, one for her mom and one, for me.
“I don’t have a ring for you, little lady, but I do have this. I want to give you this so that everyone knows that you gave me your hand forever and ever. I put a teapot on there so you will always remember how much fun we have when we have our tea parties.”
Her eyes move from the charm, to my face and back to the charm. Her little chin wobbles and for a second I fear that I’ve made a mistake. Maybe she isn’t ready for this.
Those thoughts vanish instantly when she jumps from her seat and throws her arms around my neck. I lose sight of the table when her curls hit me in the face and my arms go around her tiny body.
“You’re going to be the bestest second daddy in the whole entire world,” she whispers in my ear.
I HAVE NO CLUE HOW Molly has kept our secret this long, but one week turned in to two, and then two went into three. Before I knew it, work had kept me from executing my plan for a month. Somehow I had gotten roped into working every weekend for the last four straight. When Barnes, one of the other HTPD officers, asked me to work tonight for him, I gave him not just a no, but a hell no.
With our schedules being as crazy as they are, by the time I would get to Megan’s, Molly would either be going to bed, or already asleep. What little time I’ve had with her, has been rushed.
I had been hesitant to start spending the night more than every once in a while, but it wasn’t Megan who had put an end to my reluctance. Two weeks ago, it was Molly.
“Never leave us, Daddy! Never, never, never, ever! Please don’t go. Stop going. We need you.” Molly sobbed against my chest, where she had launched herself when I tried to leave the house two weeks ago.
Megan gasped, her hand going to her mouth and her eyes filling with tears. She had heard Molly call me Daddy a few times, but they had been infrequent as if she was testing the waters. There was nothing unsure about the way it came out of her mouth this time. Unable to do anything else with a small human attached to my body like she was trying to fuse herself to me, I sat back down on the couch I had just climbed up from and wrapped her in my arms.
It was very rare for Molly to have any sort of temper tantrums. Even more unusual for her to cry. I’ve only seen her cry a handful of times. She fell off her bike a month ago and tore her knees to shreds, not one tear. But what’s coming from her right now is rivers of tears.
“Sweetheart, what’s going on?” I ask and rub her small back, willing her to calm down.
“You can’t leave us. Please don’t go. We want you forever,” she pleads.
Hearing her little voice while it begs me to never let go, killed. I look over to Megan to see her shake her head, her eyes red with the strength she’s putting out just to keep her tears locked tight.
“Molly, look at me, honey,” I request, feeling her body shake with sobs. “Baby, look at me.”
Her head comes up, brown eyes red rimmed and her nose and cheeks reddened. I reach over, grab a tissue off the side table next to the couch, and help her dry her face. She sniffles a few times and I give her what I hope is a reassuring smile.