“I know it’s not easy for you,” Kyle said. “I feel bad sometimes.” Then he patted him on the shoulder and went into his bedroom.
At three o’clock in the morning Elroy felt the sofa bed move. When he opened his eyes and looked up, he saw Jeremy sitting at the foot of the bed. “What the fuck are you doing in here now? Your wife is practically in the next room.”
“We have to talk,” Jeremy said. His eyes were heavy and his breath smelled of beer.
“Just go back to bed, Ricky, and let’s get through this holiday,” Elroy said.
“Don’t start that Ricky shit with me,” Jeremy said. “You told me your name was Mike. What am I supposed to think now?”
Elroy sat up and moved farther away from him. “You’re not supposed to think, Ricky. You’re only supposed to fuck on command like a good stud. I’m sorry, Jeremy. There’s nothing to think about. So go back to bed with your wife and leave me alone.” He knew sleeping with married men could be dangerous. He never thought he’d wind up in this position. He’d always hoped his life story would wind up interesting. But he didn’t want it to be this interesting.
“I’m talking about us,” Jeremy said. “You know I can’t get enough of you.” He had a helpless expression; he seemed to be pleading. He looked rumpled and scruffy in his boxer shorts and white T-shirt.
Elroy closed his eyes. “What about us?” He wanted to tell him he’d been planning to end their affair before New Year’s but decided not to get into that now. It wasn’t the time or the place.
“I thought we had something special,” Jeremy said. He moved closer and reached for Elroy’s leg. “Can I come into bed for a minute? I’d like to hold you for just a minute.”
“The only thing we have is sex,” Elroy said. “That’s not something special. We both know that.”
“Can I get into bed with you for a minute?” His full erection was now sticking out of his boxer shorts. He made no attempt to cover it.
Elroy did not reply as fast as he should have. While he hesitated, staring at Jeremy’s erection, Jeremy’s hand slid under the covers and rested on the inside of his thigh. The next thing Elroy knew he was on his back with his sweatpants off and his legs wrapped around Jeremy’s waist. By that time it was too late to answer. Jeremy had already put on the condom and pinned him to the bed.
* * * * They did it again the next day in the back of Jeremy’s pick-up truck. While the rest of Kyle and his family watched the kids open Christmas gifts from Santa, Jeremy and Elroy went into town. Jeremy made up an excuse about going into town. He said he thought he’d left the lights on at the house where they’d been renovating the kitchen and he wanted to go back and check to see if he had. Oscar told him not to worry about it. But Jeremy refused to relax until he knew for sure, and he asked Elroy if he wanted to take a ride with him.
If Kyle thought there was anything unusual about this he didn’t show it openly. He seemed more relaxed than Elroy had ever seen him since before Lev Godwin’s death. Aside from Babe’s snide gay comments, the rest of Kyle’s family seemed to be accepting the fact that he was gay.
Babe didn’t care about them going into town. She was too busy with the kids. Oscar wanted to take a nap and Patty had been in the kitchen since dawn roasting a turkey. So Jeremy and Elroy left the house and drove down another back road that looked even more isolated than where Kyle’s family lived. Jeremy parked in a small turnaround between clusters of tall pine trees. Jeremy didn’t even remove his clothes this time. While Elroy took off all his clothes, Jeremy just pulled down his zipper and put on a condom. When it was over, Elroy told himself this would be the last time they’d do this.
Before they left Vermont for Boston, Elroy and Jeremy did it again in a shed at the back end of the property. Neither of them took off their clothes this time because it was too cold. Jeremy grabbed Elroy by the neck and forced him over the tire of an old tractor. Then he pulled Elroy’s pants down to his knees, pulled out another condom, and fucked him so hard there were black marks from the old tire all over the front of Elroy’s jacket. Prior to this, Elroy had told everyone he was going out for a walk in the woods. Jeremy had told everyone he was going to the garage to work on the generator. When Elroy returned, he said he’d tripped and fallen on a tire and they all believed him.
The day they left Vermont, Elroy had a short talk with Jeremy. Enough was enough and he had to put an end to this. He cornered Jeremy in the family room while the rest of them were helping Kyle pack the car. “This is over,” Elroy said. “It was fun while it lasted. But I’m done. If Kyle ever found out he’d never speak to either of us again.”
“Why do you care so much about Kyle?” Jeremy asked. “He doesn’t seem to give you the time of day.”
Elroy shrugged. “I care about him, that’s all.” He didn’t owe this man any explanation.
“You don’t care about anyone but yourself and you know it,” Jeremy said. “And we both know it takes a man like me to keep a man like you happy, not a pussy like Kyle. I know your needs.”
Elroy thought about that for a moment. The part about Elroy not caring about anyone but himself was true, so he made no attempt to deny it. He simply smiled and said, “You’re wrong about one thing. If there’s one thing I care more about than myself, it’s Kyle. And, just so it’s clear, he’s the only one I’ve ever felt that way about and I’m not going to hurt him.”
“What if he finds out about us?”
“I didn’t plan this with us,” Elroy said. “I didn’t know you were his stepbrother when we first met. If I had, nothing would have happened.”
“You sound so sure of yourself,” Jeremy said. He moved closer and tried to put his arms around Elroy. “I think something would have happened even if you knew I was Kyle’s stepbrother.”
To show him he meant business, Elroy grabbed his collar and yanked him forward. “That doesn’t matter now. All that matters is that Kyle never find out about us. Do we understand each other?”
Jeremy seemed more than amused. He laughed and said, “We understand each other.”
Elroy took a step back and said, “Kyle is the one thing I am sure of, Jeremy. Trust me. Nothing would have happened if I’d known you were his stepbrother. And that’s not going to change. So be a good boy and make sure this never gets out. We both knew it would end anyway.”