For a moment, the two friends squared off, taking each other’s measure. Then slowly, wordlessly, Brent braced a hand on his shoulder. “If you were to get there in time, you’d have some serious convincing to do, man. She already accepted the job. You better be up for it.”
Convincing? After everything he’d said…done? Panic rolled through him, blood rushing in his ears. He’d let his insecurities rule him, positive she’d run because she didn’t like what he’d shown her. Had he been wrong?
A sickening feeling opened up in his stomach as he recalled every word he’d spoken in the darkness their last night together. We can’t keep sneaking around like this. I need to do the right thing. He’d still been holding back, not giving her a hint as to what he felt, beyond wanting her in his bed. He’d opened up his past as a way to give her his trust, ask for hers in return. She’d likely seen it as an excuse he’d been giving as to why he can’t trust. He’d only confirmed it for her by neglecting to show up at the bench on time yesterday.
She’d thought he’d ended it with her.
Oh God, he’d made a massive mistake. She was getting ready to board a plane, thinking he wanted nothing more than casual sex from her?
No. No. This couldn’t be happening. Matt barely registered moving toward the locker room door when Brent laid a hand on his arm. He turned and met his friend’s grave eyes. “JetBlue terminal. I’ll text you the flight number. Go get my sister and bring her home.”
Chapter Nineteen
Lucy stood at the ticket counter waiting for her boarding pass, every click of the computer keyboard feeling like a nail driving into her skull. It had taken every ounce of her energy to convince her brother that leaving for France so soon was necessary. That the job wouldn’t be there unless she jumped on it immediately. In truth, she would have had to make the decision in the next few days, anyway. Putting it off would have only increased the likelihood of her running into Matt again and she simply couldn’t handle the emotional fallout from that.
“Paris in June.” The attendant, a kind-eyed redhead, smiled pleasantly. “I’m sure it’s going to be beautiful. Any reason for the last-minute trip?”
She started to give some generic answer about giving herself a graduation gift, but the truth picked that moment to set itself free. “Kind of…yeah. Some dickhead decided to use my heart to make fertilizer. I’ve only known him for a week, but I can’t turn the corner in this city anymore without thinking about him and his stupid, stupid gorgeous face. And the way he looked at me.” She blew a breath toward the ceiling. “I guess I just had something in my teeth the whole time and he was embarrassed to tell me.”
“Now, I’m sure that’s not true. You seem lovely.”
“Well, I’m not. I’m a liar and a nuisance. Ask anyone.”
The attendant’s fingers began to fly across the keyboard at a frantic pace.
Lucy took pity on the poor girl and shut her mouth, glancing casually at the television in the waiting area, which had a twenty-four-hour news station playing. Several people had gathered beneath it, pointing up at the screen and talking to each other. For the hundredth time that day, she saw the footage of the explosion in Lower Manhattan. It had been everywhere she looked, on the cover of every newspaper, playing on every channel. She’d found it extremely difficult to look at, knowing how much worse it could have been. What she could have lost. Whom she could have lost. Lucy started to look away from the screen, then did a double take. Matt’s picture suddenly took up half the television, underneath the words Matthew Donovan, ESU Sniper, Saves Hundreds of Law Enforcement Lives, Hostages.
Her scalp prickled as she reread it. Why hadn’t he said anything? She remembered her brother’s words then, when he’d returned home yesterday. Let’s just say Matt picked a good time to start speaking up. She’d been so relieved to hear Matt was unharmed, she’d completely let the cryptic statement slip her mind. After saving the lives of so many people, he’d come to her directly afterward, holding her close as he slept. As if he’d…needed her. Yet he’d never said why, just kept it all bottled up inside.
What else had he kept to himself?
She was distracted when the attendant pressed her boarding pass into her hand. “You’ll want to get to the gate quickly. They’re already boarding.”
Nodding absently, Lucy began weaving through the crowds of travelers, wheeling her suitcase behind her. Thoughts of Matt continued to intrude on her brain. A new voice telling her she’d missed something. Matt wasn’t the type of man who showed up with flowers and fed a girl recycled lines. He communicated in his own subtle ways. Ways that were easy to miss when you were so focused on what he wasn’t saying. What she felt for him wasn’t casual in the least. She’d needed to hear him say the same thing that night in the kitchen. Had his opening up about his past been Matt’s way of telling her he cared?
Or maybe she just wanted an excuse not to do the best thing for everyone and get on the plane to Paris. Yes, that’s what she needed to do. She wouldn’t stay in New York on the off chance Matt decided to—
“Lucy!”
She’d just reached her gate when Matt’s shout washed over her. The hand holding her suitcase handle went slack, sending her luggage crashing to the floor, but it took her another ten seconds to turn around and face him. He stood a few yards away, stillness in a sea of chaos, the way he’d been the night of the engagement party. Perspiration dotted his forehead, eyes a little wild as they scanned her head to toe, snagging on the boarding pass she held. As always, his distinct, male beauty made her chest hurt. He looked out of place in such drab surroundings, his gray eyes cutting through everything in their wake to jump-start her heart.
She waited for him to say something, but he just continued to look at her. Anger prickled along her skin. She’d made it this far and now he was holding her up. For what? More silence?
“What are you doing here?”
Pain clouded his features. “I’m sorry you have to ask me that. You should have zero doubt as to why the hell I’m here.”
Lucy shook her head. No, she was done trying to interpret vague declarations. Done with trying to read between the lines. She needed words. Something to reassure her that this thing between them existed outside her imagination. She snatched up her suitcase and kept walking. “Try again, Matt,” she called over her shoulder.
Doing her best to ignore him, Lucy got into line, readying her boarding pass and identification, even though every fiber of her being was screaming at her not to get on the plane. She could feel Matt’s gaze on her as he drew closer. “Don’t get on the plane, Lucy. Please.”
She looked up at the ceiling to keep the tears in her eyes from falling. “Why?”
“I went to the bench.” His voice sounded raw. “I’m sorry I was late, but I was there.”
Oh, she wanted to believe him, but with so much uncertainty dancing around them, how could she? “How can I know for sure?”
“Virginia and Frankie Mason Until the World Stops Spinning.” His gaze pled with hers.
Lucy’s heart leaped into her throat. She wanted to go to him, bury her face in his neck and hang on for dear life, but she needed more. Needed to know this thing between them was real. More than just a convenient itinerary with chemistry thrown into the mix. It had always been more on her end, but what about him?