“I do. I want to be out on my own. I’m just so frustrated. I thought I could come back and have it all. I realize now it doesn’t work like that.”
“You can have it all.”
“Not here I can’t, Beau. I need more independence. I’m thirty-five years old. What am I doing with my life?”
The room falls quiet between us, our dinner growing cold in the unease of the conversation.
“You want out, then move into my place.” The words leave my mouth before my brain can think it through.
“What?” Her brows furrow in confusion.
“You want out of here, I want to keep you safe. Move in with me.” Again with my mouth blurting before I can think. Fuck.
“Beau—”
“Mackenzie, I promised you the night I saved you I would protect you.”
“And you did.”
“And I will continue to, darlin’. I can’t stop you from leaving, but I can offer you a place where I can protect you.” I can’t let her move out on her own, not when I know Chad is just waiting for the perfect time.
“Beau, you’re not always going to be able to protect me.”
“I will if you let me.” She draws in a deep breath, her hands going to her temples.
“We’ll drive each other mad. Have you ever lived with a woman before?” I can tell she’s clutching at straws; this back and forth is almost funny. But I’m going to keep coming back at her.
“I have a big place, and we’ve practically lived together here since you’ve been back.”
“I don’t think it’s a good idea.” She’s fighting it, but the more I let the idea grow, I think it’s the best idea I’ve had.
“You stay with me, or you stay here. I’m not budging on this.” I need to be able to keep her safe, and I can’t keep her safe when she isn’t close.
“Do you really think this is the best idea?” She folds her arms in front of her, and from what I’ve come to learn about Mackenzie, this move means she’s ready to argue with me.
“No parties, no women. You have your own space and I’ll still be looking out for you.” I hit her with all the pros. She doesn’t reply straightaway and I can see her resolve start to slip.
“What’s happening here? Between us, Beau?” I don’t know what to take from her question, so I answer it like I would if Nix had asked.
“You know what’s happening here, darlin’. I’m just doing what I promised,” I lie, not sure what I really need or want from her. She is nothing like I’ve ever wanted before. Part of me knows offering her this is too fucking dangerous, but the other part of me—the part that connects my dick to my heart—thinks it’s the best idea ever.
“So we’re just friends?”
“You want to be friends with me?” I tease, not impressed with labeling us as friends. Do friends want to fuck each other’s brains out? I don’t think so.
“Quit playing. I’m serious, Beau. Living together, it’s not something I thought about, so you can’t just come in here and demand I live with you. I need to know how this works.”
“Nothing changes. You stay at my place until Chad is found.”
“Until it’s safe.”
“It’s only going to be safe when he’s found, darlin’.” She diverts her gaze like she wants to argue, but she doesn’t.
At this moment I’m torn. As much as I want the fucker found, I’m not sure I’m ready for Mackenzie to stop needing me.
“And I’ll be free to come and go as I please?” she presses for more leeway, darkening my mood.
“You let me know where you’re going so I don’t worry.” I’m not okay with these stipulations, but if it means I have her in my home, why the fuck argue? She won’t know I’ll have a tail on her at all times.
She thinks about it for a few moments before she holds her hand out for me to shake. “Deal.” I raise a brow at her, but she doesn’t drop it. “Shake on it, Beau.” I give in and place my hand against hers. Her touch is soft, but firm and my mind moves straight to how it would feel wrapped around my cock.
Shit, down, boy.
“Thank fuck we’re done with arguing. Now, can we eat?” I release her hand and pick up my fork.
“Yep, dig in.” She picks up her own fork and places a small mouthful of pasta in her mouth then follows it with a soft moan and all I can do is watch.
Jesus, I’m a fucking idiot.
This woman will be in my home. How the fuck will I control myself then?
“Okay, I’m heading to bed.” Mackenzie breaks the silence an hour later. After eating dinner and our normal light conversation, I managed to convince her to leave me to wash up. As with everything else, she put up a fight, but eventually gave in and ended up sitting on the counter telling me about her day working for Nix, and about a girls’ night Kelly and Holly invited her to next week.
Like I’d be okay with her going out for a girls’ night right now when she’s meant to be laying low.
I kept her talking and we moved it out to the back deck to have a few beers.
“Yeah, I should too.” I stand from the chair and start picking up the empty beer bottles. She walks inside while I check everything over one more time. Security fencing surrounds the club, but having Mackenzie here has opened us up for an attack. By who, we don’t know, but I wouldn’t put it past Chad to put a hit out on us.