Fight like hell to fix what you've done wrong."
"Please, Anna," he said, their bodies still connected, "please give me another chance. I know you deserve a man who hasn't lied, cheated, and stolen. I know you deserve a man who doesn't break bones for a living. But Anna, can't you see that I'm the man who's in love with you? I'm the man who will do every single thing he can to make you happy for the rest of your life. I'm so damn sorry for every mistake I've ever made. But especially this mistake. Because hurting you is the worst thing I've ever done. The stupidest. Please give me the chance to prove to you that I can love you right this time. Please give me the chance to prove to you that I'm not going to blow it."
"Why should I?"
She was angry now and he could feel the tension thrumming through her, through muscle and bone and skin covered in sweat from both their bodies.
"I gave you the chance to love me. I gave you the chance to be a real husband to me. I trusted you, Cole. And you still hurt me. You still did the one thing you knew would tear us apart.
You made sure it would happen. You taught me more than pleasure. You taught me how to close down my heart. How to protect myself from pain. You taught me how dangerous it is to trust."
Her br**sts rasped across his chest as she finally let go of the anger she'd been holding inside, her hands fisted on him as if she wanted to beat him off her.
"You've already had every chance in the world to love me right. So why the hell do you think I would possibly give you another?"
Fight. He needed to keep fighting. For love.
For Anna.
"Because you're brave enough to trust me. Because you're brave enough to know the truth when you finally hear it."
She blinked and he could see droplets on her eyelashes. "Whatever you think you saw in me, it wasn't bravery. It was stupidity."
"No, baby, no more lies."
Still hard inside her despite his climax, he shifted her closer with his hands on her hips, and heard her gasp.
But she didn't pull away.
It wasn't much. It wasn't forgiveness or redemption, but it was something.
And he'd take any little bit of hope he could get.
"People have been running from me my whole life. I've got scary down to an art form.
But you--you've never run." Her eyes widened with surprise. "You've never let me scare you away." He still held her close, their bodies still connected in the most intimate way possible.
"Don't let me scare you, sweet girl. Not when telling Ty those things was just a stupid act, just me trying to pretend I was too tough to fall in love. Not when you're the bravest person I've ever met."
He could barely breathe, the blood rushing in his ears making it hard for him to hear himself say, "Be brave for me, sweetheart."
Chapter Twenty-Three
Anna's family crowded the VIP box, along with her friend Virginia. She'd asked them to come and even though she could see they didn't understand why she was here at Cole's game, they came.
She didn't understand it, either.All she'd known was that she needed to do this, needed to prove to herself that she really was brave. Cole had said the words to her again and again, but believing it for herself was something else entirely.
Last night, after their crazy floor-sex, he'd gone back to his house. And she'd been so lonely she was surprised she'd survived the night.
Since graduating from college, she'd lived alone. She'd liked the silence, enjoyed reading or listening to whatever music she wanted. Sure, she'd sometimes longed for a partner to share her life with--more as the years went by--but she'd never once felt lonely.
Not until Cole had gone.
Cole had only been in her house twice, but she could feel him everywhere. She'd never look at the entry the same way again, or the kitchen where he'd picked her up and carried her the afternoon after their wedding. And her bedroom...well, she simply couldn't go in there. So she'd slept on the couch.
And wondered all night about Cole.
If he was sleeping.
Or if he was as tormented by loneliness, by desire, by regret as she was.
If he was barely able to keep himself from grabbing his car keys and coming back, just as she was.
If he dialed her number dozens of times, hanging up before the seventh digit each time, like she had.
If he missed her as much as she missed him.
Sunlight streamed into the box as Anna yawned. Even with her new dog--the name on his tag was Lucky, amazingly enough--she'd been so lonely, she'd woken up both herself and him from crying more than once during the night.
Frankly, the hardest thing of all at the moment was trying to act like her mother and father and sisters and brothers-in-law and her friend weren't all looking at her like she was going to break in two.
Julie walked in and came over to introduce herself. "Hi everyone. I'm Julie Calhoun. My husband is one of the guys down there."
Alan, one of Anna's brothers-in-law, all but leapt out of his seat to shake Julie's hand.
"Wow, so nice to meet you. Ty is a legend. Congratulations."
If Julie was at all overwhelmed or amused by this greeting, she didn't show it. "I'll be sure to pass on your thoughts to him." She shook her head, laughing. "Although, frankly, that head of his doesn't need to get any bigger."
Knowing exactly how in love Julie and Ty were, Anna's heart squeezed with such longing she felt choked with it.
"Do you have a moment to chat?" Julie asked her quietly, after meeting the rest of her family.
"Sure." Anna forced a smile, knowing her family's eyes were on them as they moved out into the hall.
"How are you doing?" There was no pity in Julie's voice, and none in her eyes. Only natural concern.
"I'm here." Anna honestly didn't know how she was doing, just that she'd had to come to Cole's game.
She was surprised to see Julie smile. "I think they must put something in the Outlaws'
water bottles to make sure they're irresistible." Her smile fell away. "Ty wanted to call you to say how sorry he was for his part in all of this. But I knew he'd only make things worse."
"None of this is Ty's fault." Anna shrugged, trying to act like she was more okay than she was, just as she'd been doing all morning. "It isn't even all Cole's fault. It's my fault, too."